ANSWERS: 9
  • Honey, no one but herself can make her stop, or make her listen. People - no matter if they have a drinking problem, a drug problem, a gambling problem - don't like to be told what to do or that they're hurting other people, no matter how gently you do it. She will brush aside your comments until she is ready to listen. Maybe she will be one of the lucky ones and just stop, but in all likelihood it's going to take some time before she'll realize that she's upsetting the people closest to her. The best you can do is to just be supportive for her and the rest of your family. Talk to your dad and your brothers. Don't tolerate poor behavior from your mother if it occurs, but don't hassle her about it, either. Most of all, worry about yourself and your own sanity above everyone else's. If it becomes more than just a bother to you, talk to a friend or a therapist about the stress it's causing. Best of luck...
  • a little acting may help. many are blind to themselves and think they have no problem. I would drink a little and act a lot show her what drunk looks like but make sure she is sober when this happens. It helped one of my friends when I showed him what drunk looked like to those sober.
  • Maybe you and your family members should contact Al-Anon. It's basically a support group for people whose loved ones may be alcoholics. The sad thing is, if your mother's behavior is embarrassing now at parties, there is every possibility it will at some point affect her job and the safety of all of you. It's affecting your family now. It's also destroying her health. Since you have no power over her decisions, maybe Al-Anon can help you empower yourself so you can deal with this. I'm sure this is difficult for your family and my heart goes out to you.
  • I saw this show where they did like a family intervention meeting in their own home and each got to speak to the person about how they felt, it looked like it was very effective, heavy on the heart and it wakes the person up to what/who they are hurting. You have to do it with a counselor for the best effectiveness. (Both my parents were alcoholics) Best of luck to you,
  • Dear Heart, you have received good advice - especially about Al-Anon (or some other support group for co-dependents). I just wanted to add this note to give you support and encouragement.
  • My mother was an alcoholic and addict all my life. You know instinctively when a parent is doing something harmful, and it sounds like your mother has a problem and you're feeling the effects. The thing is, there's little you can do to affect her behavior. You could tape her and show her what she looks like, but that's not going to solve the fact that she may have a serious addiction. What you can do is protect and nurture yourself. As others have mentioned, Al-Anon can be very helpful. You can listen to the stories of others and say out loud all the thoughts you've probably been struggling with to people who understand. Know this. No one wishes you mom could stop drinking more than your mom does. This is an illness. Even if it's become a bad habit and not a full-blown addiction, your mother is in a precarious place. Nurture your spirit so you can help be strong for her and your family. Educate yourself about alcohol abuse. Best of luck to you.
  • My mother was an alcoholic and addict all my life. You know instinctively when a parent is doing something harmful, and it sounds like your mother has a problem and you're feeling the effects. The thing is, there's little you can do to affect her behavior. You could tape her and show her what she looks like, but that's not going to solve the fact that she may have a serious addiction. What you can do is protect and nurture yourself. As others have mentioned, Al-Anon can be very helpful. You can listen to the stories of others and say out loud all the thoughts you've probably been struggling with to people who understand. Know this. No one wishes you mom could stop drinking more than your mom does. This is an illness. Even if it's become a bad habit and not a full-blown addiction, your mother is in a precarious place. Nurture your spirit so you can help be strong for her and your family. Educate yourself about alcohol abuse. Best of luck to you.
  • call your local alanon or alateen - remember, you cant do anything about her making decisions to destroy her own life but you can save yourself.There are ppl there who are going thru the same thing you are. let me know how you do ;)
  • not much you can do about it, you cant stop her from drinking

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