• I expect to be grilled about any police record I may have, drug or alcohol dependency, social disease, what religion I am victim of, and am I stupid enough to think party politics is a sport. Beyond that, effective first date interrogation should continue with an hour's haranguing about what do i plan to do with my life and just who the hell do i think i am anyway? I cant have any respect for a father who wont introduce himself properly like that. He should then offer me a condom and a beer, and tell me a joke I can use later, and make an off-color remark about his own wife's ass, or else he has failed the interview. If this seems strict and elaborate it's only because it needs to be. Mating is a serious business, matey!!

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