Maybe it's time for a calm, heart to heart, civalized conversation with grandma. Ask her exactly why exactly she feels the need to criticize your every move, and let her know it hurts when she does that. Try not to blow up, but calmly explain this to her. Like adults. If she still doesn't get it, maybe it's time to, you know... let distance make the heart grow fonder.

You can say to her. "Grandma, how would you feel if I decided to stop visiting you because of all the things you say that hurt my feelings?" Then wait...wait for an answer. If thirty seconds pass in total silence, ask same question. If nothing else, she'll think about it. Then you need to do some deciding.

Ask her about herself. How she's feeling, maybe ask how her day was. Try being nice, maybe she will be too, eventually. It's not easy getting older, have a heart.

I'm sure this is a hard thing to live with. It's a good idea to try to set "boundaries" with those you live with -- regardless of who they are. You're not obliged to just let her walk over you. This can be tough to do sometimes, but it's important for your own development and well-being. Ideally, you want to be able to be firm but respectful. For example, you can say "Grandma, it's not OK for you to talk to me that way. I want you to stop doing it and don't do it anymore. I have feelings and you're being rude". Then walk away. You may have to do this sort of thing many times: if possible, don't get too upset and start shouting, and don't go into long-winded speeches about how terrible she is. There's a difference between defending yourself and attacking someone else, and you would be best off learning about this difference. Imagine that you have a sort of "territory" around you -- people aren't allowed to say nasty things to you, or push you around -- but when you push them back to the edge of that territory, you should stop yourself. Don't keep going and start attacking THEM. This can be difficult, because often you'll be angry and want to punish them. But if you can learn to defend yourself and then restrain yourself, eventually most people around you will learn to be respectful and appropriate... and even if grandma never learns, you'll end up with more self-confidence from practicing this approach.

We'll think about this. Do you want to have some type of realtionship with her. Or do you want to cut ties. If you want to have a relationship with her I would learn how to tell her in a nice and respectful way. . "Grandma it hurts my feelings when you. . ." It is very difficult for anyone to changer their personality much less someone who is elderly. Also to look at it from her perspective she may be lonely and depressed. Which would make the personality qualities that you talk about worse. My grandmother could be very negative and hard to deal with. But now that she is very ill and I can't talk to her at all I miss her very much. It could be that your grandma is simply not a nice person and there is nothing that you can do to change that but it could be she needs some understanding and limits set in a loving way.

I wouldn't. My grandmother USED to be like that with me. But idk, I'm really crazy about my grandparents, I've never told them anything negative or ANYTHING. I just couldn't bring myself to.