ANSWERS: 4
  • up to two million gay, lesbian, and bisexual adults in the United States have been in —mixed-orientation“ marriages. In turn, their 2 million heterosexual husbands and wives and 3,500,000 children were impacted by the denial, discovery or disclosure of their spouse or parent‘s same- gender attractions and sometimes sexual behavior. These couples can be found in every sector of society across the country, age, educational level, socio-economic class, racial and ethnic group, and faith community. For heterosexual spouses, finding out that their husbands or wives are gay, lesbian, typically causes shock, denial, and, for some, relief to find an answer as to why they believed they were not sexually appealing or unattractive or why there was little sexual intimacy, unexplained absences, or changes in behavior. After the initial shock, that is often devastating, every post-disclosure story of coping and outcome is different.
  • Yes, I was gay as a child, I always knew that, but I was married for a number of years in the early 1990’s. It was a genuine attempt to live as a straight man, it's what my faith expected of me. It's what my parents expected of me. It's what everybody around expected of me. It was an attempt to try and deny my sexuality and to 'do what for others was “the right thing”. During that period it became increasingly apparent that I was never going to be at ease with myself unless I was honest about my sexuality.
  • bisexual partners may not even be aware themselves. A minority of individuals enters knowingly into such mixed-orientation marriages, but they are often unaware of its implications for their relationship. For those who do support same-gender marriage, the reasons are many and varied. A major reason , I think is to prevent anyone else, the heterosexual spouse or his/her gay/lesbian/bisexual partner from having to suffer the pain and grief, depression and sometimes illness that both spouses endured because of the legal and societal sanctions against a gay, lesbian, or bisexual person's forming a relationship with a partner of the same gender. Other reasons relate to the importance of truth, integrity, love, and societal acceptance. Sometimes, a marriage between ”one man and one woman‘ is a recipe for disaster, tragedy, and heartbreak: when one of them is straight, and one--openly or secretly (perhaps unknown even
  • Some gay men an lesbians want that committed, open, loving, and lasting relationship so bad they force themselves into a relationship with the opposite gender, get married and have kids. As you can imagine this causes a lot of pain and suffering for everyone involved, most importantly, the children. It would be so much easier for everyone ifblaws limiting marriage to a man and a woman did not exist.

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