Would you or do you teach your children to "hit back" or "turn the other cheek"?
by 
Pinkheavens
ANSWERS: 31
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I'm torn on this question because I'm a firm believer in the golden rule, but I'm also against violence ... for the most part I want to raise peaceful children, but I hope they don't end up being pushovers
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I taught them to never start a fight, but to end it quickly and decisively if they were attacked.
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I would teach them to choose their battles wisely, sometimes it is best to just let things slide but sometimes you have to fight back.
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Since kids can be such bullies I told them if they get hit first then by all means protect yourself and give as good as you got.
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I do my best to teach them how to avoid the situation, but not to ever be a victim. They are good kids and stay out of trouble but they will fight if provoked.
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If I had kids, I would teach them to duck and run.
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If they get hit first, they better hit back...unless they're already knocked out. Next time sonny...next time!
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I'm teaching them to never start a fight, but to not run from one either.
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The painful truth is that sometimes children are physically just not capable to fight or to defend themselves effectively against bullies. So children that are taught to be clever, street-wise, will be more likely to get out of tricky situations without getting themselves hurt.
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When I have kids I will teach them to never ever swing first and to use their words in order to avoid a fight as best they can. But if someone hits them first, to always stand up and defend themselves. My mom always told me to never start a fight, but to damn well finish one.
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Hitting back will NEVER be punished in my house. I teach my daughter to never start a fight, but if she has to fight she should finish it. I was taught to not stop hitting until they stopped moving. I won't teach that, but I celebrate self defense.
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I taught my daughter to never be the first one to touch & if someone hits her, give them a warning but if they do it again to use her karate training to beat the living hell out of them
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I'd teach them to hit back, but never hit first. Turning the other cheek just helps getting beat up more.
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There are lessons to be learned from both philosophies. Children must understand when it's appropriate to use force and when it's not.
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both philosphies are excellent..what I would like my children to do would be to be able to differentiate when each type of behaviour was appropriate
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I was taught to be peaceable as much as it was possible on my part. And not to be aggressive. If someone picked on me, I found a different solution than hitting back or retaliation. Sometimes it meant telling someone else, like a teacher, sometimes it meant finding a different way home, and sometimes it meant standing my ground and showing them I was not going to be deterred. But I never assaulted anyone or had to fight back. I think my parents were very wise and reasonable and I learned that there are many solutions to a problem.
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I taught my children to not start fights, try to walk away, but if you cant, then you need to defend yourself.
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I teach my children to never hit first. If someone hits them then I tell them to fight back, and always hit harder than you were hit. It is self defence, and children need to know how to defend themselves. Self defence will never be punished in my home.
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Hit back, dont run from problems, stick it back at them. I think turning the other cheek can jsut make you a pushover. My kids will not be pushovers.
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I raised them up believing to "turn the other cheek."
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This is my hubby's jurisdiction. He is a FIRM believer in "avoid getting hit if you can". He will teach our kids to "Never take the first hit if you can help it." If you KNOW someone is going to throw a punch, you better knock 'em out first and end it quick. Generally, whoever gets the first hit in wins the fight, and you don't fight unless you intend to win.
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I thought my kids to hit back. Nobody has the right to attack them, and if they do, my children should defend themselves. I hope they knock the little bastards block off!
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I've explained to my daughters that They NEVER have the right to be the agressor. If someone punches them, suck up the hit and we'll deal with it later. If someone punches them repeatedly hold nothing back, let them have it with everything you have UNTIL the point is reached where she would now be considered the agressor. At that point she would be wrong. Then we'll deal with it later. NOONE has the right to beat anyone else to a pulp and my daughters have every right to defend themselves. "Turn the other cheek", but within reason.
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This is a good question Pinkheavens!My children know it is never right to hit another in anger,meaning Do Not Ever start a fight!If they can walk away from someone who has hit them do so!If they are the subject of a bully by all means kick-butt! They do sometimes punch ea. other on the arm and I won't interfere usually but,if it is in anger they know they will be grounded and not just for a week!
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I am working on a median answer, my goal with my kids is to develop a strong sense of what is right versus what is wrong. I teach my kids not to "start" fights, I teach them to try and reason, and I teach them to NEVER let anyone continue to hit you, there comes a time when you simply have to defend yourself, so fight back and fight to win. It's tough out there now and kids have to find a way to deal with very dangerous minded bullies who want more out of you than your lunch money.
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I tried to teach mine to hit back as a LAST resort. with the youngest, I put her in Martial Arts at the age of seven. She now has a 4th Degree black Belt in Tkd,(Champion in forms, sparring and weapons) a yellow belt in Brazillian Jui Jitsu and some background in Hapkido, Judo and Krav Maga. She has never used it on anyone outside a class or tournament, but if she needs to she can defend herself in almost any situation. She is also very proficient in an array of weapons (sticks, chucks, sais, sword, kamas, bo staff and she is even pretty good with fans). The most valuable thing she has learned in her 10 years in martial arts is how to avoid most situations that would require her to defend herself. She can prevent most people from hitting her in the first place so there is no need for her to hit back. (sorry for the *bragging* but it's Mom's rights, ya know..lol)
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I would go with the rule my parents taught me and I in turn taught my kids, if someone hits you once leave it as it could have been an accident or something they immediately regret doing but if they do it again then kick their butt.
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I was taught from a very young age how to defend my self and I learnt very very well..but I also learned how to finish something very quickly, I was also taught to ask the person who hit me to please stop and if they didn't to stop them hard fast and with a minimum of fuss... so to answer your question I would teach them how to defend them selves and to always give the other person a chance to stop ...to me thats turning the other cheek..if they don't choose to stop ...then you make them ..hard fast and without fuss
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... to run (sounds chicken-like, but everybody involved in personal security would say right that) in a more general sight: "hit back" in a sense of "Face your problems" and avoid to be the "Other cheek"...
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I have a 7-year-old son and about a year ago, he had a problem with one kid hitting him all the time. He'd come home with scraped knees from being pushed down, bite marks and one time, a black eye. I got tired of it, so I told my son to hit him back if he hits him again. The next day, he punched my son in the arm and he hit him back, in the face. It seemed to have worked since that kid doesn't hit my son anymore. Bullies, even young ones, seek out weak kids who won't stick up for themselves. So now if someone hits him, he's going to hit them back.
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We've told ours that they are to Never hit first, but if someone else hits them first, then by all means you fight back. Of course schools now have this "zero tolerance" policy wherein both kids would be tossed out of school, which I think is crap. But I'm not going to teach my kids it is ok to let someone else hit them or otherwise bully them.
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