ANSWERS: 75
  • I trust my husband completely, and if one of his female friends was going through something and needed his help, I would be glad he could be there for her.
  • Only if he would leave his penis behind for safe-keeping.
  • I'm male, but if a femail friend needed me, if she felt unsafe etc., then I don't think it would be a problem for anyone, if I did it every night I'd be a dead man :-)
  • It's not a question of allowing..I am not his mother. I don't think I would like it very much and his female friend should not call on a married man or someone who is in a relationship in the middle of the night. She needs to have other people she can rely upon besides someone's husband. Hubby or boyfriend should not make themselves available for things like that either.
  • Yes it wouldnt bother me i trust my husband 100%
  • no... i trut my bf.. but out of respect for me.. no.. he can call her.
  • If he had a female friend that needed him I am sure that he would go to help them. I do not think I would have tried to stop him going and my allowing would not be a factor he is /was a man not a child.
  • I would prefer my boyfriend to not leave his house in the middle of the night to "reassure" a female friend of his. That just doesn't seem right to me.
  • Reassure his girlfriend of what? Sounds like there is hanky-panky going on. Why not go with your boyfriend and be a consoling back up? If your boyfriend objects, he is cheating.
  • Hell no!! If she needs him that bad she can come to OUR house and discuss whatever her problem is.
  • Well, we've been married for a long time and NOTHING like this has ever come up before. My husband and I do not allow or disallow each other to do things. Whether or not I would be comfortable with such a thing would depend on how I felt about the woman. I have pretty good instincts about people. Once one of my husband's employees (a young woman) called our home at a very early hour because her father died. She was basically calling to let him know she had to leave town to go to her family, but she was obviously upset and needed to talk to someone. Hearing him comfort her the way he did just made me fall in love with him all over again. Generally though, my husband doesn't really make himself available like that to women for reasons that are his own. If I had to guess, I would probably say that he believes that he wants to stay focused on being there for me and our kids, our parents, siblings, nieces, nephews, grand-nieces, grand-nephews... He's already got a big enough job!
  • This happened once several years ago to me and my hubby. A wife of one of his friends called around 12 am and said she needed my hubby to come over because she needed someone to talk to. My hubby said "here talk to my wife" and handed me the phone. It was all innocent. She thought her hubby was cheating on her but he actually wasn't. While my hubby would do anything to help a friend, he does respect boundaries and knows to avoid anything that may appear inappropriate.
  • We do not grant permission to do anything at my house. The wife and I are both adults and are capable of making adult decisions, just like we are capable of dealing with the consequences of these decisions. Aside from that, anyone who calls our house after 9 pm knows that it had better be very important. We are talking dead or dying important. In light of that, I would have no problem telling the wife to go and reassure a male friend of hers who needed help. I am sure that she feels the same way about me. Good question.
  • This is a situation that has happened many times for us as before we were together my husband was the fix-it guy for many of his female friends and even ex-girlfriends. After we were together if they would call we would go together, as i knew a lot of them. In time the ones who were sincere would respect us and start calling during more appropriate hours and the ones who were insincere got annoyed at me and finally stopped calling. LOL now after 2 years the ones still around just call me instead of my husband.
  • this happend with my ex, a lot ( i was with him for 4 years) turned out he was cheating one me, not only with her, but several others. i'm not saying this is your situaltion, but trust your instincts,
  • Yeah sure, but I'm coming - I'll make the coffee.
  • I don't know about ALLOW, but if my husband wanted to leave MY bed to go "reassure" anybody, I think we've already got bigger problems then a female friend...
  • My boyfriend is always helping someone, it doesnt matter what time of day or night it is one of the qualities I love about him, if you trust your S/O there shouldnt be any problem. P.S. Allow him???? I dont own him. He is an adult, capable of making his own decisions.
  • If I'm in a relationship with someone, it means I have good reasons to trust them and know them. So if I was in that situation, yes I would, and I would do anything to help her as well.
  • There is no correct answer. Everybody has different types of relationships and trust, or lack of. Personally I would never do anything like that unless my mate came with me. What did he actually reassure her about? Hopefully is wasn't that she has the power over him enough to leave the bed of his mate in the middle of the night. Sounds like BS to me. If he takes a shower when he gets home or you can tell he did over there, you know what happened. Or does he smell like sex? Those are the dead give aways.
  • I would have no problems with that. My trust my husband.
  • Allow? Yeah, I don't own him. But I would sure rethink my relationship if he would even do such a thing. How disrespectful to me. If it were truly an innocent situation, I'm sure he would make accomodations to make me feel more comfortable about the situation. He sure as heck wouldn't want ME trying to pull something like that!
  • Allow? One cannot own another person - so, I'm not sure what you mean by "allow"....?? the attitude I'd have is simple, said as follows, "If there is anything I can do to help, let me know, otherwise see you later." *later - might equal 2 hours, tomorrow, the day after - unless we have plans, I really don't care, nor would I care what she does to console him...; if it becomes sexual, she would know to alert me when she returns if there are any health issues for us to consider...before we get together again....; other than that, i'd hope she had a good time and so did he....
  • I can't "allow" him to do anything as he has his own free wiil. That said, Um..,...no. First of all, my husband doesn't have female friends who aren't married to his male friends. Secondly, he respects (and darn well better continue respecting) that our relationship, his time and energy, and the sanctity of our home and marriage comes before all else. Unless she was friends with him before we married and I knew her well, what would a married man be doing having that *close* of a relationship with a single woman, anyway?
  • Of course I would
  • I would have to say no...she can be reassured in broad daylight...at a reasonable hour, preferably in my company.:)
  • The word 'allow' doesn't come into play, but would I be OKAY with this? Yes. I have and would again. I might even go with him, if I thought it would help. I trust my husband, and admire his desire to help others. We both have friends who are male and female, and wouldn't limit one another in this way.
  • I would feel very weird about that. I'd be asking a slew of questions & also if I could come along. That sounds really suspicious.
  • No way! It couldn't bo so important that they can't wait a few hours and see each other in the morning. That sounds a bit suss to me.
  • HELL NO. This just isn't right.
  • I don't own him, but no i wouldn't try to stop him either
  • I can't tie him down.....has for being happy with it, it depends....if it's a long time friend that I know: sure go ahead, I don't want to get up.....if it's his new secretary....never mind, stay asleep honey, I'll go
  • HHEEEEEEELLLLLL NO YO!!!... (And I'm a guy.)
  • Let's see... middle of the night + single female= HELLLLLLLLLL NO! My husband doesn't have female friends but let's say he did then they would have to be my friend as well, so neither one should mind if I tagged along. In the middle of the night too? She better take her arse to sleep.
  • I would reassure him that he won't be seeing me around anymore.
  • you might want to consider the word "allow"...people can do whatever they want, they don't need permission. the only thing you can do is determine if what your s/o does is acceptable to you in your life. If it is not perhaps let that person know, in a nice way, how it makes you feel and they can determine if they are willing to alter some things for the greater good of the relationship. that is how you determine if the relationship is right for you. AND...no, I would not be comfortable with that situation and I would let him know.
  • If I was the boyfriend / hubby, I'd probably be asking my girlfriend / wife to come with me. 1. I'd assume that they would relate better to the other woman than me. 2. To reassure my girlfriend / wife.
  • I really would like to say yes, but honestly, it depends on the female friend. Besides, the way we do things, we would probably go together. Not because of jealousy, but because we tend to do almost everything together.
  • He really only has one close female friend. They have been best friends for longer than I've even known him. She also lives 4 hours away, so I doubt he'd drive the four hours in the middle of the night..unless she was in the hospital, then he'd ask me to go with him. BUT, to answer your question if she lived nearby, I would fully trust him if he preferred to go comfort her...because I know that if he needs to, it's something pretty bad. *edit* EVEN THEN, he'd probably ask me to go with him. Knowing him, he still wouldn't feel right leaving in the middle of the night to go see her. :P
  • I trust my fiance a lot, so I know he wouldn't do anything with any other woman. He has quite a few female friends, and they've known each other longer than we have, but I know that we would go together because that's mainly how we do things and besides his friends are my friends and my friends are his friends :)
  • if i know her, sure. other than that, no.
  • hell to the no. if u put a steak in front of a dog, he'll eat it if hes hungry or not.
  • i allow my bf to do anything he wants. thats really the only way to get to know who he really is and decide if you like it or not.
  • he can leave but his balls are staying where they belong, in my purse (along with his man card) *dont tell him i said that. lol
  • id trust my boyfriend now... but there are definitly certain guys i wouldnt. personally id like to tag along.
  • I don't "allow" anything. He makes his choices and I make mine depending on his. We're all big kids here. If he gets up in the middle of the night to "reassure" a woman- I'd have to think about this- would he tell you that he was going over there if he was boinking her? What happened to make him go over there, did she call? Or did he just wake up in the middle of sleep and decide to go over? I'd talk to him about it and see what his response is, and ask to meet her. See where it goes from there.
  • Try not to flame the question writer too much for their choice of words. My husband and I give each other a lot of space and plenty of freedom, but there are SOME things outside either his or my comfort zones and those are things we ASK each other a sort of permission for. "Babe, can I go hang out with (insert friend name here) for an over nighter?" Here is an example. We are also both very respectful to one another when it comes to our opposite sex friends. My male friends must be accepted by my husband or we part ways, and the same goes for his female friends. This is because before he and I are ANYONE else's friends, we are each other's best friend. I actually had a male co-worker (we were also good friends at work) call me drunk needing me to help him get into his house. With my husband's blessing, I drove out to his house to find him blacked out in his driveway. When I got him coherent again and walking, and inside his house, he took my car keys from me (drunk or not, I'm 4 foot 11 and he was a big guy), threw them out a window, then grabbed me and proceeded to try and kiss me, tell me he was in love with me, and then throw up on me AND himself. SO.. I guess my point is, if either the wife or the husband has a friend call late at night needing help, either go together, or kindly let the person know that it would be more convenient if they just dropped by YOUR house.
  • Not at all. Wait till morning and always have your partner with you . This is inapporpriate.
  • no! What is wrong with her??? Let me guess, no boyfriend, but so high maintenence she expects OTHER peoples boyfriends to run when she calls. No, she needs to get her own boyfriend.
  • No. My husband and I do not spend time around the opposite sex alone (other than our children/family). We do this out of respect for each other, to avoid any temptations, and to leave no doubt in the others mind. We try to keep as much of the drama out of our marriage as possible.
  • Absolutely not! That is asking a bit much of another persons patience and trust. Anyone who would, simply didn't care enough to begin with. My husband would find his stuff at her doorstep the next day with a not that said... "Stay there! She needs you more than I need to put up with your crap."
  • If Im allowed to go too.....I will be right there by my husbands side to "reassure" this female friend.....=)
  • No, OUT OF THE QUESTION. Would he think it's ok to let you go to a male's friend in the middle of the night? If he doesn't care, then is he worth stayin with anyway? Probably not.
  • Hella naw. Unless theyre related.
  • yes, why not, he could reassure her that shortly after he arrives I'll be pulling up behind him prepared to let her have it.
  • No!Would your bf or hubby allow you woman to go and assist another man in the middle of the night.
  • It depends on who it is... but most likely no, unless I can come along.
  • Sure I'm up for a field trip!!!! Lol
  • If this were happening, then the two of them already have way too intimate of a relationship. If he wasn't physically intimate with the friend at that point, he likely will be soon. It sounds like he's going over there to score himself some pity sex.
  • Not without him taking his clothes and expecting me to file for divorce. As he will not be coming back into my house. If she need help that bad then she can go to the emergency room at the hospital. My husabnd is a friend not a doctor or head doctor or a counseler.
  • well let me put it this way...any friend of his, I will know and if i don't we already have a problem right there. And if he needed to leave to reassure her, he would ask me to come with or we would have a big problem.
  • Oh sure. I'd encourage him by saying something like "You need to support your friends, honey. Now let me get my purse and we can go."
  • If it's his sister then yes...or a relative. If it's a friend than absolutely NOT. Why would a female friend need a married man to come over to 'reassure' her...I can gaurantee that if she's got one friend she's got a dozen others to choose from, preferrably one that isn't married. Do you think my husband would like if I were to leave in the middle of the night to go and 'reassure' a single man? Hells to the no, he wouldn't "fall" for that!
  • Bad idea.
  • Women are just as important and trustworthy as men. Why wouldn't a man be able to help a female friend just like a male friend? I don't see any issue with it, have done it many times, and will continue to.
  • i'm a guy, but unless the chick is 70 yrs old, i wouldnt let him go. i wouldnt let my wife go console some guy in the middle of the night.
  • Of course I would - and I would be right there with him reassuring her that he is MY husband, assessing her need for reassurance and then making sure she is really clear on how much help she'll need if she pursues my husband any further!
  • This is how affairs begin. A man being sympathetic to a woman. And some women know this and play it for all it's worth. To a guy a female friend is just someone they haven't slept with "yet". (Watch the Movie: When Harry Met Sally) If everything is really just on a friendship basis, she should come over to your house. This middle of the night stuff is for the birds. Better yet, why can't he just talk to her on the phone? If it's just comforting words she wants to hear he doesn't need to be there in person.
  • NO! They make toys for that.
  • "Allow" How can you stop him if he really wanted to go? But I'll tell you what... His ass wouldn't be getting back in any time soon.
  • allow him?yes believe that bullshit story? no think he was cheating? yes
  • I don't think so. It's not that I'm possessive or anything, I just don't think there's anything so urgent that he would have to leave in the middle of the night for with another female.
  • only with a broom stick up his azz lol
  • well,, my fiance was texting a female because he said she needed to 'talk' and needless to say I am a very easy going person,, but it was the one time he saw the nice sweet easy going love of his life had it in her to get highly pissed off and believe me if he were to have gone to her in the middle of the night,,, well that would have been a way different side of me he would have seen and it would have been really ugly and I would no doubt have 'lost my religion' on him so my answer would be NO!

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