ANSWERS: 9
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  • If you go by what the psychiatrists say, yes it will be normal. But beware! If You'll take it lightly at this stage,you'll be risking their future,'cause their explorations might land them in trouble.Any shrude family member of yours can turn their inquisitivness into sexual abuse. It's time when you must discuss all about sex and her body growth in a scientific manner,making her realize that sex is not for 'fun' but bringing a new life on earth.Also make it very clear to her that it is something meant for after marriage. Being a spiritual person,it's my sincere advice,that keep your children away from pornographic material,and give them something spiritual to read.If possible,get a book on this topic from some Indian saint's ashram like Shri Asaram ji.These books ridicule pre marriage sex and very elegantly explain all about sex and it's importance.
  • Wow, who would've thought all that stuff from that Human Sexuality course I took last semester would actually come in handy? In theory, this CAN be considered normal. Many young girls begin to experiment together with their sexuality, usually between the ages of 12 and 14. However in recent years, that age range has dropped to as low as 10 years old, since kids are maturing earlier and earlier as generations progress. The most agreed upon observation at the current time is that girls reach sexual maturity faster than boys. This behavior between your nieces is an example of early maturation, particularly given the fact that the one niece is only 11 years old. Its not likely that an incestuous lesbian relationship will occur between your nieces, but you should be mindful that it is a possibility. If you are concerned about your nieces, you should tell their mother and father, if you aren't their legal guardian. Since i'm not sure how you found out...reading one of their diaries perhaps, having one of them tell you, maybe someone else found out and told you...you should think what it would mean if you were to tell their parents. Also, you used the term 'frequently'. Since I'm not sure how many times would be considered frequently, that is also a factor to take in. If happens every other week, then it is probably only a normal experimentation. However, if it happens multiple times a week, or in a more extreme situation, a daily basis, then there is something happening. It may be a psychosexual disorder, which usually results in frequent urges to masturbate and have sexual encounters. Since your nieces have begun this habit with each other, one or both of them may be experiencing a psychosexual disorder, resulting in the both of them fulfilling their every sexual desire with each other. As I said earlier, most of these sexual relationships that happen between sisters tend to stop before they go too far. But do keep in mind that if these encounters continue in high frequency, there may very well be a development of a sexual/romantic relationship that could potentially tear the family apart. If you beleive that these encounters are happening too frequently, or if you are just disturbed by it, let their parents know right away so that they may begin councelling. Also remember the age-range difference...the 14 year old sister may be able to easily persuade or convince the 11 year old sister to do this, and the younger sister may very well enjoy it. Also remember that just because they are experimenting with each other, it does not mean that either one of them is a lesbian...while it certainly is a strong possibility, most young girls who have these encounters together do it for fun, for psychological gratification, sexual gratification, practice, or many other reasons. But most psychiatrists will tell you that this is a normal and, in moderation, acceptable behavior between sisters. While certainly not common, it isn't unusual. Decide for yourself, based on what you know about their relationship, whether or not you need to put a stop to it. It would be best to act immediately before this goes too far. There's actually a study that suggests that many teenage girls(roughly 30-65%) between the ages of 13 and 20, are frequently experimenting with same-sex encounters. In fact, the study suggests that teen girls are having sex with each other up to 60% more than sex with guys. Experts are predicting that this will lead to a massive increase in lesbianism and bi-sexuality among young girls. Same-sex encounters between sisters are included in these statistics, and make up a large percentage of these encounters.
  • From the time I was about 8 until I was 10 my (female) friend and I would touch each other and lie on top of each other - anything to stimulate each other, which included humping. We kept it hidden and just stopped after awhile. I am not gay, nor do I have a desire to experiment with girls. I think at the time we both were discovering our sexuality and learning what felt good. Probably shortly after we stopped we both discovered masturbation and realized that you could please yourself. I do have a question though, are your nieces sisters or cousins? Because if they are sisters, I would think that that is not quite normal...well, what do I know. Hope I helped a little.
  • Where the line? It seems like a vast grey area, but those with power establish their line within it. My sister and I at ages 6 and 7 liked to jump on our own beds with nightgowns on and no underware. It started in the summer living near the border of basra. Well we got a good wipping. It stopped. I do remember that I had no sexual thoughts though.
  • No, this isnt normal at all. Homosexuality is abnormal to begin with. Now add incest to the mix and you really have something that is not normal at all especially when it happens on a regualr basis.
  • Hard to say what's normal; it's probably not as rare as we would imagine, given that a fair amount of same-sex physical experimentation is not unusual. It seems to be a way of exploring without the risks of involving an other-sex partner. Query whether there is any such thing as "incest," a strong taboo generally thought to be grounded in the dangers of too-close inbreeding, where dna is not being merged. Recreational activities may jolt you, but at least none of the manifold problems that can follow on actual sex are present. How seriously you take it depends on your moral and ethical alignments, religiosity, etc. Your nieces are certainly not too young to have the basic facts of sexuality put before them, if they haven't been already, including that no sort of coercion into a sexual or quasi-sexual relationship is ever acceptable. (I'm wondering how mature the 11-year-old is -- 11 to 14 is kind of a spread. That's an issue no one out here could advise you on.) But that would be true of anyone that age. Incidentally, you don't say how the information came to you or what kind of setting they're living in, but make sure any response you make doesn't do more harm than good.
  • Thank you all for your input. After taking in many of these answers I have acted, and now allow me to answer my own question based on what occurred: There have been requests on clarification to this question, so I will begin by telling you that my nieces are in fact sisters. They are blood related from the same mother and father (my sister and brother and law). They come from a very good home, my sister and brother-in-law are very well to do, both of them having very good jobs. The girls were raised very well with lots of attention, though my older niece was always a bit of a troublemaker. Though personal information it may be relevant that I am a young lesbian (and I take Jack Scotty's comment to be rather offensive, btw), and my older niece has looked up to me for most of her life. I came out to my family when I was about 15, which was roughly 9 years ago, so the knowledge of my orientation has been around for some time. I have had many girlfriends in the past, and when my sister used to visit with the kids I didn't know if my nieces completely understood, but it may have had an effect on my older niece. Based on all of the advice given here, I acted by informing my sister of the situation. I had found out because I accidentally walked in on my younger niece in the bathroom because she hadn't closed the door. It was about 1am and she was unclothed from the waist down, washing herself. She seemed terrified that I discovered her and began 'spilling the beans' so to speak, immediately. She told me that her sister had begun influencing her to partake in sexual acts two years earlier, and it started as somethign that happened only once or twice a month, but then became as frequent as 4-5 times a week in the past year. I of course did not beleive her despite all the tears, but she retrieved her sister's diary for me, where I was able to confirm her story. After debating whether or not to tell my sister what had been happening for a while, I followed the advice on this website and informed my sister. We confronted my niece, and after several hours of 'interrogating' she broke down. We learned that she had not only done this with her younger sister, but she had seduced the 9-year-old sister of one of her close friends and convinced her to have oral sex, as well as two other girls that were closer to her age. She apparently turned to her sister for sexual comfort becuase they had always been very emotionalyl close to one another. Though my younger niece was confused about what was happening, she had always followed her sisters' lead and so didn't question her sister when she tried to manipulate her into sexual situations. We have taken my nieces for counseling, and the doctor beleives that my older niece is a homosexual, and has been confused as to her orientation and probably tried to cope with it by giving in to sexual desire. Why she chose her younger sister we did not understand. My younger niece does not appear to have homosexual tendencies but the two years worth of sexuality with her sister has undoubtedly left a mark of confusion in her. The doctor told us that if this had happened on and off for two years on the basis of once a month, then it would have been considered somewhat 'normal' exploration behavior. However, her tendency to manipulate much younger girls into sexual situations (the 9 year old girl may not have been the only under-12 girl that she manipulated) is a cause for concern. Homosexuality seems to run in my family (I am a lesbian, and I had an uncle and a great aunt from previous generations who were homosexuals) and it seems that my niece may need help in dealing with her sexual desires. My advice to anyone with a situation similar to mine would be to not wait...act on it immediately. It is not normal by any means, and even though sisters DO sometimes turn to each other for emotional comfort and at some times exploratory behaviors, frequent sexual contact and manipulation is a bad sign. Don't wait...if you see a problem liek this, act on it. Thank you again for all your help!
  • I honestly do not think this is normal. If they are at the ages of 14 and 11 they should know what is right and wrong. Maybe you should talk to them about it?
  • Without knowing any further details I would say it is just sexual play. They are discovering their bodies - how their bodies work. I would not be concerned unless they start forming an attachment to each other that prevents them from being social and forming other attachments.

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