ANSWERS: 32
  • Because you're picky. Its easy to get into a relationship...they're really common and come in lots of varieties (sexual, abusive, boring, long-term, etc). Here's how you go about it: You pick someone who has some of the personality traits you like, you flirt with them, you hang out with them, you date them, you get into a relationship with them. Then you find out what kind you get! It's like an easter egg or gambling.
  • Maybe you are like me ... I am VERY choosy about someone to be in a relationship with .... I do have very high standards and I expect anyone I am involved with to have the same or at least very similar standards .... Perhaps that is why I am single again ... LOL ... BUT: I will not compromise my standards or ethics for anyone ...
  • My god you sound like me.I am in on a saturday nite because all my friends are with their boyfriends! I hate it-so depressing.I broke up with my bf two yrs ago and always made time for friends.I know i am fussy now but what is the point of settling for less than you have had in the past...my motto is always aim higher and never compromise on standards.
  • You have high standards,
  • second that
  • You're not looking and if like most females you are waiting for someone to find you.
  • I can understand that's frustrating. But I can't help wondering, based only on what's evident in your question, what is driving your quest for a relationship? You're fed up with "the single life", whatever that is... is there a Single Lifestyle Council which declares what a single life is? You mention that your friends are in relationships -- are you feeling like they're leaving you out now, or is there some envy of them? And why are you trying to "find somebody"? What does "somebody" have that you need? Here's my suspicion: you have a lot of ideas about what a relationship is, you think you're incomplete or can't be happy without that, so you want one. It's sort of like that you have a job opening, and you've put up ads, but aren't getting qualified resumes or something. What does any of that have to do with connecting with a specific person? Love is what happens when there is a mutual experience of knowing and appreciating another very specific person at an extraordinary level. It isn't the solution for a job opening. A generic "search for mate" is like scanning the horizon for a ship of appropriate dimensions, rather than actually relating to a specific human being authentically. You have to stop treating it like some sort of factory order you're trying to fill. Live your life, and enjoy your freedom. If you aren't fulfilled by that, find out why. Then, if you happen to discover someone whom you really connect with, let that connection grow. There's no schedule that needs to be met.
  • As someone who faced your dilemma and had to settle in life later for someone I didn't really love simply because I didn't want to live my life alone, please take a close look at yourself and try to understand why you feel so incomplete. This is not a failing on your part, just your coming to terms with what really it might be. Perhaps something happened to you in your youth. Evaluate your life. Are you doing what you want to do? Going where you want to go? Growing into the person you feel you need to be? Only when you are happy with yourself, only when you are connected to your soul, will you attract your soulmate.
  • I remember feeling that way only too well. Then I looked at their relationships and none of them had what I wanted. I wish I had waited.
  • I seem to be in your situation, but as a boy. Its horrible.
  • I'm single too (not fed up with it though) but I just haven't found anyone who I want to be committed to. I can't find anyone 'Real'! +3
  • maybe you not looking hard enough or your looking in the wrong places
  • not me...and you may be the lucky one...give it ten years or so before you start feeling left out
  • It's a big world, you just having met that "right" person yet. In the meantime, you should enjoy your life being YOU! I've seen that the best relationships happen when you're not really "looking" ... Life is too short to fret about what you don't have ... enjoy what you have and make the most of it!!
  • I don't know hon... When you figure it out, let me know too. I suppose I haven't found anyone yet, because in the back of my head and heart, I keep hoping my ex will love me again. But I know that isn't going to happen because he lied to me and used me and never did in the first place. My mother called it; "Living in hope and dying in despair."
  • I have one piece of advice for you that is invaluable. Don't play the victim. You have a problem, you want a relationship. You can sit around stewing in your own anger right now, or you can go somewhere and see if you would be able to meet someone. It's very easy to blame life for not throwing you a bone, but it's actually our own fault for not fetching it. Sorry, I know I'm being a little harsh. But it's a thing that I realized a few weeks ago that has changed A LOT for me.
  • im in the same boat as u, i guess were suppose to be patient, but ur right it does suck lol
  • I could be a blessing in disguise. Relationships are a pain in the ass and a lot of work. Being single is the best. I wouldn't be in a relationship for a million bucks! You should being single...ahhhh the freedom!!!!
  • I offer up my 28 year old single co-worker... come to Northern NJ and I will introduce you.
  • I joined an internet dating service! Using an ABUNDANT amount of caution, it worked GREAT! Even married the guy!
  • The older I get the more I enjoy being single. I raised my kids and partially grandkids. I no longer have to listen to a woman snore or whine about things i could care less about. I watch what I want to watch on TV. If I feel like masturbating I can guilt free, I eat what I want, I can make messes and not worry about whether I clean them up or not, I do as I damned well please on my computer, sleep as late as i like, go to bars if I want even though i no longer drink, can flirt with impunity and can look at other women whenever i want without getting the elbow to the gut..I mean...where's the down side? We split up about 4 yrs ago and the more time goes on the less i miss her even though I do miss her from time to time.. We were together 22+ years and we both put up with each other all that time and in retrospect i really have no idea why. There were so many times i wanted to just belt her a good one, but never did. In short, my life is much more peaceful, less stressful and I sleep much better than ever before.
  • i wouldn't worry about being single. as far as relationships, maybe you could start dating men outside of your expectations. i don't mean to lower them but some women want only a particular type of guy physically and eliminates others. after all its just a date. the more different types of men you date the easier it will be find Mr. Perfect.
  • I've been single 57 years and don't regret it at all. Maybe you just think too much about it. Try to engage in some activity that takes your mind off it for a while. If that doesn't work, you can always try counseling.
  • As for everything else in life, the right relationship will happen, but only at the right time. So don't pressure yourself about meeting someone because your friends have. I think it's wise of you to set uncompromising standards for yourself, because in the end you'll get exactly what you deserve. And often times the bigger requests in life takes the longest time to come to fruition. A wise woman once told me that if you look for love you'll never find it, but as soon as you stop looking that is when it will find you. Don't lose hope because you could be alot closer to meeting the right man than you think.
  • I am exactly like you.Try to be happy and enjoy your time ,it will come to you only you have to have patient.Br happy and look good then it will come to you.that is my advise to you. thanks
  • no...i'm better off than 90% (or more) of the people i know that are in relationshps.
  • Probably because you're single. If you had someone, you wouldn't be anymore.
  • if your still looking my e mail is cemteryman@yahoo i am a good man just cant find my miss right i keep finding miss wrongs
  • ugh! i know how that feels and its not a great feeling it rather brings you down. i ask the same question everyday "why cant i just find some one" but i guess things happen for a reason or maybe were just not ready for it but i hope sooner or later we find some one who will cherish us.
  • I'm single for a long time. My life is full but sometimes I get the feeling it is not complete. Often I look at friends, neighbors, etc who are married and realize that my life is different than their's. I'd like to have someone to come home to, a partner, someone supportive , in my corner, someone to share my life with. On the other hand, I'd be giving up a lot of freedom. I go where and when I want to. I'm independent & I enjoy being alone sometimes. If I want to blow my money, I'm the only one who will benefit or suffer by it. My time is my own. When I see couples that are well-suited to each other, which is rare, I wonder if I'm even capable of being half of that- assuming that I could find someone.
  • Well I kind of feel the same way. Where I go to school, everyone seems to have a lovey dovey but me. I have considered that perhaps I am very picky. I also realize that the girls I am attracted to are outside of my social circle, in other words, they are girls I might see in the hallways but that I have never talked to or even met before. So maybe I have a tendency for girls who are out of reach??
  • Just join a BDSM group and get a 24/7 TPE slave with no limits and no safeword. That way, you call all the shots in the "relationship" and you don't have to compromise your standards.

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