I am 44, female, and have been single 10 years. I can't seem to meet a nice guy. Men say I am beautiful and I have a great job. I am kind of old fashioned and don't hop into bed until I've known someone a while. What's the secret?
by 
Happy Lady
ANSWERS: 23
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Secret? There's a secret? I think the truth is.......... some people don't know when their better off! You sound like you have the world by the tail. Enjoy your freedom, pick and choose, he'll come along. Better to have yourself and be happy, than to (think) you've met Mr right and be wrong!
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There's no secret to finding men - they advertise them on the Internet! To be brutally honest at our age the men are either damaged goods and equally frightened that they will be alone forever and convinced that all women are after their wallets.... or still married! Not hopping into bed is nothing to be ashamed of - pat yourself on the back and never let those standards drop! If you aren't meeting the right people perhaps you aren't going to the right places - if you like to keep fit go swimming or to the gym on adults only night, join a club to further an interest, look out for singles evenings in places near you. Understand also that some men will feel intimidated by a beautiful woman with a great job - maybe aim a little higher than you have been?
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you are doing the right things. Now you must put yourself where the right man is. You need to hunt for him.
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Hi HL. Let's start with learning to accept yourself as you are...without judgment. You are a mature adult female, physically attractive with a good job and a good feeling about yourself. That's great. There aren't enough people who can say that about themselves...of any gender. Of course there are men out there with whom you could have an excellent relationship...and they're looking for you. Hooking up is difficult. Two things. First, focus on yourself, on how great you are and how you are complete within yourself. Then focus on what exactly it is you want. Be specific in your wish list. Imagine yourself with "him". Put some energy into your dream, your ideal scene and in many cases the universe will surprise you. Good luck. Moving to an area with a larger gene pool is also helpful.
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When you find that secret out Hon, give me a call? :o)
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KNOW MY MIND BEFORE MY BODY1
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You are going about this wisely. Read "Red Flags" and any book by Van Epp. Maybe you are giving off fear .... look within as well.
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First, don’t even mention you are 44. Who cares about your birth certificate? Second, looking for a roommate, male or female, good decent accompany. Then, you will get what you really want, a good accompany for life and never be alone again. How does it sound?
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I'm going to be 44 this month, I have been single most of my adult life. I fell in love the first time this year, but it didn't last. I am independent, smart, funny, they say I am pretty, I just don't get it. I don't think I will ever find love.
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Happy well adjusted people, with a love and passion for life and the world and humanity tend to attract and receive the same love and affection in return. It is a simple principle upon what the premise of good fortune is based. The ability to rise above adversity with an understanding of others mindful of owns own impact and careful to be sensitive and considerate accrues the same measure in kind. If you seek to appease or satiate a desire, need or to fill a void, you will undoubtedly find others will facilitate you in the same manner, to fulfil a momentary and temporal need. If you love with a deep and sincere kinship you will find people tend to be open and as considerate as the time you expend and the empathy you convey for their needs, wants and wishes. Life, the world and humanity are a mirror of our own soul, reflected.
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Hm. Can you join a church? Are you religious? Sometimes people meet people in their religious circles. Do you have a photo of yourself you can post? But I have to say, I have had a nightmare of a time dealing with jerks for the past ten years. They can really make you suffer if you pick the wrong ones like me. I was an idiot.
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Hi..... I'm in the same boat!! I don't know why? I have had offers but they have not been right for me. I blame my ex. Sometimes I wished that I had never met him! Having said that if the right guy came along I'M SURE I would give him a chance.......... There has to be some chemistry. Maybe that's why? Quite honestly, I haven't gotta clue lolx Wished I had cos sometimes it can get a bit lonely......maybe a man might be able to explain why??? Hope you enjoy yourself in the bigger city......and hope you find what you're looking for!!!!
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the secret is - you are fabulous there aren't enough fab guys for you if you dont want to waste time on the wrong ones its ok but sometimes its ok to have a little fun :)
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dont go looking for mr right let him look for you when i was lonely i just gave up 2 days later in town a grate guy came alone offering me anything now we know each other well. im like you i cant jump into any mans bed i have to know them first
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Hey, understand was single very long time before I met my husband. Be picky and get to know someone slowly . It will come. Are you getting involved in the community or church or someplace to meet a man? Do you have friends that know someone. You got to be in places to meet someone. But I totally hear ya on not getting physical. A man who knows your old fashioned is a keeper. That shows respect. Plus you really want to get to know someone by who they really are and not focus on the physical as of yet. I met my hubby in church and in a singles group . But you may have another way or choices of places you can go. Its almost when you are not looking it comes. Good luck to you.
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Maybe your standards are just to high. Im nice. I just dont drive a mercedes. Your focused to much on economical issues rather than just finding love. Or sex. It could be to late pretty soon.
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I'm a bloke, spent alot of time alone (but I got someone now). When was the last time you saw a man? When was the last time you spoke to a man? What did you say to him? I used to ask myself the female equivalent of those three questions all the time. Usually the answers were: "A long time ago", "an even longer time ago", and "nothing significant". While it was never a pre-requisite, when I got a girlfriend, I usually ended up in bed with her not long after. In hindsight, it was probably the sex that let me know that she was interested in seeing me again!!! No, I'm not asking you to compromise your standards, just letting you know what you're up against. Some of us men-of-low-self-esteem really can't take a hint, so make sure you spell it out! Again, I'm not asking you to lower your standards, I suppose a "When can I see you again?" would work. Good luck, hope you find what you're looking for.
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Hey maybe you already found him and just don't relize it yet thats how it was for me I was single for 7yrs and all a long he was right there.
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it depends on your attitude towards the opposite sex...well dunno much but anyways i am single...
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Well dont feel too upset-- I'm 43, and I've been single for 10 years myself; you can get bitter after awhile, I know. Its hard to keep putting yourself out there and getting discouraged and it makes you want to give up --- but I'm a firm believer in looking at life through a glass half-full, not half empty. I am grateful for what I do have-- though I never met a husband, I did make some good friends, had some great sex, and some good companionship. I also made some good business connections and learned alot about myself meeting new and interesting men. The single life can be lonely, but it also has its plusses too! I think its hard to know what the "formula" is for finding a good man and maybe there really isnt one..but if there was, its probably just hard work, regular dating, luck, and determination, with a pinch of faith and a dash of believing in yourself and your desireability :) Hang in there hon .. there are many many women going through the same issues and it gets harder as we get older, but that doesnt mean the game is up! So keep playing and keep believing :)
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Old fashioned is you don't hop into bed until marriage. It's also the correct way to do things. It's also the only acceptable way to have sex in the eyes of the Creator who created it. All other roads lead to hell. But you don't want to marry just anyone. Dating is to find out who a person is before you tie them to your life and the lives of your loved ones forever. www.youtube.com/openairpreacher
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I don't know the secret to finding a keeper...I've given up. I rather like being single.
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