How do you negotiate that fine line between "want & should"?
(ex: you want to do ___ but should do___)
by 
aloha girl
ANSWERS: 3
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First thing, I consider who will be affected by my decision. Then I look at the "shoulds" that will be "put on the back burner." If I am sure that "down the road", I won't regret my decision, I get the "want." Life needs a "want", once and a while.
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"Want" and "Should", I think, are verbs that qualify how somebody should go about doing something. It speaks to one's motivations and relationship to the outcome. You want something, and this is somewhat selfish, but not necessarily selfish in that bad way. It just means that the ends are justified because you will get something out of it and therefore derive a sense of satisfaction from the outcome. With "should", I feel that is governed by a sense of higher moral value... not just what you are seeking in the outcome. You feel obligated to do something because it is the right thing or good for you. I think it is very lucky when what you want and what you should do end up being the same. But life is not fair, and this is not always the case. I think I am in favor of doing what you should do, because it speaks to strength and integrity. But there are times when you should just do what you want :-)
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You ask pretty deep questions:) For me, as I can only speak for me, I usually do an accountability check. I may want to do something but I look at the consequences.. i.e. maybe I have a term paper to do and if I do what I want, it wont get done and I may get an F. Or if turn down an invitation to a birthday and I go to the movies I may be seen by someone who might tell the birthday person where I was, then I may not have a friend... lame scenarios but you get the jist I am sure. I usually do what I should but I have been known to do what I want :)
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