In your opinion and/or relationship, what constitutes cheating? Take into account everything from the physical to the emotional. *I would love to hear from people from one end of the spectrum to another (aka closed to open relationships)*
by 
altgirl84
ANSWERS: 9
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Well personally for me and my husband we have quite strict guidelines for what we class as cheating, only because we have both seen our families destroyed by affairs. we both feel that if we have emotional feelings for someone else that ae leading us to want to be with that person, that we should face up to it and get out of our marriage before it goes any further. when it comes to physical acts, i always think would it look like you were a couple to a complete stranger if they observed your actions. if it would then that is cheating. we choose to have a completely closed relationship, just the two of us forever and ever. however if i had met someone different who openly admitted that they were not likely to be monogamous i would have considered an open relationship i think. at least you know then where you both stand and there is no deciet, so i don't suppose i would feel cheated on.
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Well crap. This'll be hard to answer, considering my life style. As you know, I have no problem with having multiple partners, and I have no problem with sharing. But, it'd have to be with someone I can trust. And someone my partner can trust. If my partner went with someone I can't trust, I'd feel betrayed. Emotionally, I'm closed. I don't like letting others in. There's only like... two, maybe three people in my entire life I can open up to, and one of them is my brother (so there's no relationship there, obviously). So if I do let someone in, I *have* to trust them. If they betrayed me emotionally, I'd pretty much break.
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In our group of friends we have Single, Couples and several Married couples and we all talk about pretty much Everything in the house. The Rule is- If it's spoken IN the house it Stays in the house, everyone pours out there feelings in depth and get comforted so they can go out into the world ready. Mistrust tends to happen outside the house with drag-out fights in public with people screaming as they run down the street. Six months ago we had to Invite someone OUT of the house because he was having a relationship with someone secretly and his gf saw them at a park curled-up under a blanket. He was told to go to her and he had only done it four times- there is only ONE chance in this house. Otherwise in the house you can cuddle with anyone without emotional guilt.
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anything goes as long as there is no lying about it.
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It really depends on the relationship in question... with one of my exes, I had a really open relationship -- we both could have sex with other people, and trusted eachother to love eachother (bad sentence structure) despite that. I guess in that case it would have been a problem if one of us started loving somebody else as much... My current relationship is a lot more closed -- and a bit indefinite, but from I understand both of us would be uncomfortable with the other person flirting with someone else (and things going from there -- kissing, sex, etc.), but we can point out to eachother who we think is hot and so on. It's a bit odd, but I was/am comfortable with both of the relationship's boundaries. I guess it depends on who I'm with and the amount of trust issues I have at that point in life. :P
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Very heavy quesion. Well, I feel personally that if a person stays dedicated, and doesn't physically stray, or emotionally establish another relationship is not cheating. For instance, chatting, flirting, anything that doesn't involve touching another person, or connecting as if in a relationship with them is fine. Beyond that there will be consequences. My wife, on the other hand believes that anything that involves a quiet interaction (emails, texting, online chatting, etc...) that is not openly discussed is cheating. As such, my definition doesn't matter. I guess cheating in a relationship is defined by the stricter of the viewpoints. If I were to engage in something she doesn't approve of, I'd have to answer for it, regardless as to my stance on what classifies cheating.
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I was once "cheated on." Very unconventionally, but I still consider it cheating. My boyfriend at the time has a "friend" whom he would have regular phone sex with. He had never met her, it was purely phone sex friends..(i spoke to her)..but it was enough for me to say, ta-ta! (Even though I found out after a year and a half of being with him)
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When I found out my wife was getting plowed by my best friend, That's cheating! When I gave her another chance and she did it again that is cheating...3rd strike she was OUT! When I was growing up...teens.... I thought it was supposed to be one man one woman. That thought is still nice to think. But, is it reality? After my divorce I went into another relationship..yes it involved sex. Once we ended it I thought screw this. I went almost 15 years with out. When I decided to try again I got used. Now it is fun to talk sex but you know what? It would be so nice to lay down with some one that is my wife and know,,,I trust her and she trusts me as her one and only!!!
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