You forgot to mention that you are a very caring and thoughtful person. Why would you want to change that?

I think you have to learn to forgive yourself. If you want to be less emotional, less materialistic, less selfish, less competitive and less complicated, you will have to rework your thinking in each of these areas and that will take a long time because your list is long. I would start with the easiest areas and work my way up to the harder areas.By becoming more charitable to needy people, you learn to be less selfish. By reading books about philosophical matters, you become less materialistic. By doing things for shear enjoyment, you become less competitive and by getting satisfaction from simple things, you become less complicated. When you add up all your new behaviors and attitudes, you should feel better about yourself emotionally. Good Luck!!!!

Keep a check on ur thoughts....n whenever they r gettinh ehavy on u remind yourself..thsi is not what u wanted to be

First, don't be so critical of yourself; you are a good person and putting yourself under the microscope, so to speak, is part of what is making things complicated. ` Forgive yourself because you are human and we all have our flaws; now move on and foster those good qualities that AG mentioned, we know that they are there, we've seen them :D ` Next, take time to relax and enjoy the simple pleasures in life. Even better, appreciate them. (You're a writer, you can do this and it will open up more stuff to write about.) This really levels things out I have found by providing perspective. ` The old saying 'stop and smell the roses' however cliche applies here. It can be a dandelion which is even better because people don't think much of them but they are beautiful on close inspection. Even grass; every little blade is it's own plant and does some amazing stuff to be there. ` Next, be a people watcher so to speak; but not in the conventional sense. When you see people, think past the surface. Think about how each has their own thoughts, feeling and life. What is making them feel the way that they do now (good or bad)? ` This sounds like more complication in a way I know but you'd be surprised how much it simplifies things by fostering all the good stuff that we know is in you. :)

Well, now that you may recognize these things about yourself and you are really wanting to pursue in making the changes... It's good to start with books that are titled as such. Then you have to take the suggestions and work them in your all day, everyday life until you feel comfortable with where you are within yourself. Find a good balance and repeat new habits as much as possible. It doesn't happen over night... It takes a while before you convince yourself you are NOT these things. Good luck! :-)

First you should see if you really need to change. Perhaps the love of you life may have not been for you. I am a firm believer that we as humans are hard to change when we force ourselves to.. It will take something significant to make you change without you even knowing it for it to work. If you haven't changed because you lost the love of you life then it wasn't the time. We all change with time. I'm not the same person when I got married and I won't be the same person 5 years from now. Your partner will just have to except that. I hope that makes sense.