forgive her this time.

The marriage is already broken. Why put your kid through years of you two fighting and an eventual messy divorce? Get a lawyer, hammer out a fair visitation schedule, and put the marriage behind you.

Is she a serial cheater or was it a ONS? There is a huge difference. If she's been cheating over a period of time she won't change. If it was a ONS, then forgive her and forget it, but make sure she is aware that you will fight for the child if she strays again and you split up.

i really thought i was reading my life when i was reading your question. i am staying with my husband after he cheated on me. don't stay with her just for your child it won't work. you need to stay with her for you and you only. if you love her and that's what's important then stay with her. you need to look out for you, not just for the 'family'. i truely love my husband, always have and will always till i die. i have two babies, yes i want them to have a family life with their father, but if i knew that i couldn't love him and he there for me it wasn't going to work. there is no magic cure, yes i am hurt, devastated and broken up inside, but i love him and will work through these emotions over time. it will take time to work on trust, yes it has been broken and issues need to be worked through with each other together. it is possible, just stay for the right reasons. alot of people say 'if i was cheated on i would leave him', unless they have been there, they truely don't know what they would do. i thought if it ever happened to me,i would leave. but my love for him is alot stronger to stay then leave and i hope he realises this too. hope any of these words help. good luck.

I know how you feel however this is not your fault, and it is your wife who broke up the marriage not you. Obviously this is your decision, however consider her actions, will she do it again and how can you ever trust her again? I feel sad that the two year old is in the middle. I guess you could do one of two things. Go to couples counseling, or divorce her and maintain that bond and relationship with your little one.

I think a lot of it depends on why she was cheating and how truly sorry she is. I don't think this marriage is totally unsalvageable though. But if you want to make things work the big thing is to not blame her, especially in front of the kid. It happened and you can't make it unhappen. It may be hard to forgive her for betraying your trust, but unless you can do that your family WILL either split apart or hurt your child worse than a divorce.

The fact that she has confessed may mean that she is truly sorry for what she has done. That doesn't make it any easier for you, but it is different from her being caught and initially denying it. In my opinion, if it was a once off, hard as it is, for the sake of your child, I would give it another go. You are both going to need some counselling (pastor/priest/minister/secular counsellor) to get through this, but it is possible. My sister had it happen to her 3 years into her marriage, and they got through it. I admire her. I don't know if I could have been as good as she was. It has left some scars, for sure, but 15 years on, they are still happily married. But your wife must be made aware that she is being given extensive grace. If it happens again, that is it.

Sounds like my relationship. After I found out that my husband had been cheating on me, I honestly had to sit down and think about everything we'd been through and if I thought that the marriage really could work at all. I thought about if we were ever really happy or we were just "trying" to be happy. Can you look at your wife and see your world in her? If you're keeping the marriage to keep your family together you're eventually got to hurt your child anyway. Wouldn't you want your child to grow up in a house of love and laughter and show them what true love is? Rather than a mommy and daddy that are distant from one another. I think the effects of divorce and starting a new life are much easier to handle on a childs psyche than the long term effects of an unloving household. They won't think that at the time of course.. but somewhere down the road it will help them and help them appreciate what you were willing to do to show them that.

If you still love each other, and if you feel you can still trust her, then perhaps you could forgive one mistake. But if I were you, I would make it VERY clear to her that if it ever happens again, that will be the end.

You need to know your wife's true feelings. If she no longer is in love with you, if she has no plans to give up her lover, you might as well see an attorney. I find it a little strange she confessed. Perhaps her confession was a prelude to filing for divorce. If she wants to put an enormous effort into saving your marriage you two just may succeed. Otherwise your pouring sand in a rat hole.

Find out why she felt she had to cheat on you. Have you done the same? Maybe she is just paying you back. It takes a lot of forgiving after one of a couple cheats on the other. Ask her to tell you why she did it. maybe she was lonely and you werent paying enough attention to her. maybe she felt you no longer desired her. Maybe she needed someone to show her how desirable she is. Maybe she thinks you dont spend enough time with her..can you really forgive her? Do you think this is the first time she has done it? if you can afford conseling, it's worth a try.

If the child is only 2 then now would be a good time to end it. Everyone thinks it is so bad for the child but its really not. Since she cheated just make sure you get full custody, keep all your stuff and get out of there.

Family is my priority and I understand you..but like they said it takes 2 to tango..you could not do it by yourself. and the thing is you can't make a decission for her..maybe one of the best thing you can do is talk to her and explained your concerns that you dont want to loose your marriage that you love your child,you know, tell her from top to the bottom and of course dont forget that first of all, you have to PRAY. God hears prayers....to anyone and anytime...God may hate sins as we humans naturally and normally commits, but He loves sinners.it is the sin that He hates not the sinners.as a proof..read john 3:16, if you have bible...HE gave His only begotten son to die on the cross for the sinners in order to redeem our souls from eternal damnation...sounds corny or whatever but you know its the right thing to do, and that's all that matters..the right, or the right thing to do...So dont hesititate to call GOd...

Depdens on the lenght, reason in her mind for the infidelity. Her age? Sexual hisotry? Bord with a two-year old? Working too hard, not enough ME and HER and BOTH time together as couple at home and date-nights out. She may need Sex Aholocis counseling, you bot may need cpuple counseling. Are you epople of fath, prayer develop a spiritual life. WHat about a weekend retrat separately theya re offerd by Cathoics and osme other groups to sort out relationship with oneself and with the LORD and then the couple and family benefits. They are not designed for prpblem solving tereh sia retrouville group for that. Marriage Encounter for the couple is also a good Catholic program and there is also a protestant v ersion ( Catholcis find Christ in sacrametns which many protestants do not understand or accept, particularly Baptists and Evangelicals most mainline groups do not have the same difficulty.