Ive had a best friend. After i had my baby, ive been so preocupied with the baby and my hubbys and my relationship and work. She tells me i have changed and that shes hurt. I feel bad that ive hurt her, what can i do? im so overwhelmed
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Anonymous
ANSWERS: 8
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Tell her exactly what you wrote here.
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invite her around more, involve her as much as possible in whats happening in your life, in time, she will realise how a newborn baby can turn ppl's lives upside down, but that circumstances are constantly changing?
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Uh-oh. This reminds me of myself. I neglected my best friend until she sent me an article about what a true friend is. ( http://www.collectivewizdom.com/Friends ) To tell you how dense I was, I didn't get it at first that the article was about people like me. After I read it, I called her. We talked it out and worked it out. So my advice to you is to open up a dialogue with your buddy. Maybe you can both read the article and laugh about it later. Good luck!
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Your friend needs to realise things are not going to be the same as they were before the baby, and that you have alot more responsibility now, maybe make time every couple of weeks to have even just a couple of hours together and explain to her that even though you have alot of responsibility now she is still youir best freind and you love her, maybe when you get a break in the day when baby is asleep give her a call to let her know you are thinking of her, im sure if you explain everything to her she will understand! Good Luck
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your priorities change once you have a baby even more so than when you get married, your group of friends is going to change, its going to be other mothers who can either help with babysitting or advice you with each stage of your babys growth, make time for her but let her know that you have a little one demanding your time plus overtime and you cannot say "no"
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What a biatch! Nasty man- if she was your real friend and if she understood that your life is upsidedown at the moment, she wouldn't be so PETTY and RIDICULOUS. Tell her the truth- exactly what you put in your question- that should be enough- IF SHE WAS A FRIEND.
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Invite her over to spend time with you and the baby. Tell her what you said here. Ask hubby to watch the baby at least one night a week, and go out with her for dinner or coffee and to talk about what's going on in BOTH of your lives. Call her on the phone more (get a speaker phone or earpiece, so you can talk with hands free to deal with the baby). Go to lunch fairly regularly with her, if you can - even if you brown-bag it and she eats McD's - go to a park bench or somewhere else you can sit and talk while you eat. ANY of the above should help a bit with that overwhelmed feeling. Good luck. ;-)
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Well, I persoanlly think it is inconsiderate of your friends to think that thing would change after you had your baby. COME ON. Your child and your relationship with your husband are the most important, yeah you want friends to but no ones that expect things to remain the same day in day out regardless of what happends. Things change but no the person. The best thing you can do is go out and talk with her and explain to her that you are sorry that you hurt her but you need to take care of your baby and it occupies most of your time. She needs to understand that otherwise she is being selfish
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