Why do people tell you to 'calm down', when you're perfectly calm and just voicing an opinion?
by 
Lovehearts
ANSWERS: 23
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Dude, calm down! Seriously though, check how loud and fast you're talking. Those, combined with the tone of your voice, may make some people feel you're getting too into a discussion, even though you may feel like you're calmly and logically discussing a subject.
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I know. That only makes it worse.
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Because my opinion is different from theirs, has raised their anxiety level and they think I meant in anger, when it was really their own fear of my nonconformity.
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I hate that! I am calm in tone when I voice an opinion, so it really ticks me off when people say "calm down" Now if I were going off that would be different. I think some people have a hard time differentiating between voicing an opinion and going off. To some people, voicing an opinion is just that. IMHO that is a very narrow way of thinking.
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Isn't that the truth..Or they tell you "don't get an attitude". I think they know they're losing the "discussion", so they turn things on you just to piss you off.
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Are you perhaps speaking to them in an elevated tone, speed, or volume? Some people do this without even knowing it. Many people can posit very convincing arguments very calmly. If a person is outwardly displaying rage, it gives the opponent a chance to divert the subject away from the one s/he is losing the battle about. Don't fall for this. :o)
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They are reacting to the stress they feel inside their own bodies as a result of your differing opinion. They are getting pissed so you must be also. Instead of letting this get you pissed and confirming their erroneous guess just know that they are really just giving you a glimpse at THEIR state of emotion.
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Yeah I always encounter that. It's that phrase that actually makes me erupt like a volcano. Explaining is not synonymous or equivalent to yelling or something like that.
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They are trying to pi** you off. If they can get you to OVER react they can take the focus off the issue and make it about your "emotions". Passive aggressive #101
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Because most likely they aren't calm themselves and telling you to calm down is their way of saying, "Crap! You're right, but I'll pretend you're the one losing it!"
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Some folks just take any form of disagreement with their opinion as hostile and often become hostile themselves. Generally, this is closed minded type.
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It could be a "polite" way of saying "would you PLEASE shut up about this".
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Perhaps they do this because they can and they don't like your opinion, even if you're right and they're wrong. I have had people tell me to 'calm down' myself and I'm more calm than they are the majority of the time. It is annoying. They're the ones that need to calm down since they can't tell you're calm. ;)
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Because many wacko liberal minded people want the world to be all on Ridalin and nobody is ever offended and nobody makes a stand for anything and nobody has any strength or virtue and everyone just goes along like sheep following in a drug induced numbness whether it is Ridalin, Weed, or just Socialism. Actual thought and facts mean little to them.
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Yeah lovehearts, i absolutely hate that.. when someone does that to me it actually makes me angrier and i just want to punch them in the gob!! lol... grrrrr it really makes my blood boil, its as if they are saying to you 'no you are not entitled to your opinion' - isnt it??
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I have a couple of theories....I think the best one is just their way of saying "Shut up...now!"
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I think this happens for 2 reasons. First, you can communicate over the internet or on AB without actually coming face to face with a person, so people are more inclined to be more bold in their statements. Second, communication means that I convey an idea to you and you totally understand what I am communicating and what I mean. When you send an e-mail or an AB answer you can read only what I type, not always what a person means.
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I think it's because you struck THEIR sore spot or THEIR nerve and with them being caught completely off guard...asked YOU to calm down..when really...it's THEIR nerves that needs calmed :P:P:P
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Often you might not notice how worked up you are, at the time. Not only that, but other people will tell you to calm down if you hurt their feelings. They are really asking you to "calm down" on the offensive opinion.
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Because they cant think of anything to say, so they choose something that diverts your attention, or pisses you off. I try not to fall into it, but have encountered it plenty. Or maybe they are mad, and think that you need to calm down, like they need to calm down. Either way, I hate it
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People like that just don't know how to deal with things.
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I keep my fists really tight. :)
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because they would feel foolish saying "Stop Thinking"
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