Nothing. My daughter is 36 and she still thinks I'm the Wicked witch. At least you still have a chance with yours. Just be available and let her know you love her no matter what her father says about you. She'll find out for herself that you are not all the bad things her father says you are. Does she live with you or the father? If with him, then just keep your cool and wait it out. If you, then try talking to her about her feelings. Don't ask her what her father says, concentrate on her and how she feels toward you and why.

i'm more in the daughter's situation. my dad left my mom when i was younger but we grew up going back and forth between houses. because of the situation of the divorce there was a huge loyalty complex and i grew very defensive towards my father. i got in a fight w his wife, moved out, tried to reconcile but couldn't come back because i had to apologize to her which i refused to do. but in all of it my father and i did one thing right - he never pushed me away and i learned to swallow 14 years of anger jealousy and ungodly amounts of hate. i live w my mother now but honestly my father and i talk everyday, i haven't moved in but that's not against him so much as easier for me to keep everything in one house being in college and all. i'm still protective of my mom, but we have our own issues right now too. i'm trying to do what my dad did for me, and i'm not pushing her away and i'm letting her deal with her own situations. if your daughter can see that you truly love her, and that you both NEED each other, then hopefully things will be okay. you'll be in my thoughts, and i hope for the best for you. [btw concerning your ex husband, she will someday realize that when parents play mindgames it also becomes unforgiveable. for her sake i hope she realizes that before he can manipulate her and he loses her too. if you can find a way to remind him of that it would be best]

Tough situation, Mom. You can't make your husband change and you can't make your daughter love you. You might try talking with your ex and suggest to him that no matter what happens, you will ALWAYS be the girls mother and sttempting to poison her against you is not only cruel but unrealistic. Give your daughter lots and lots of love, lots of hugs and let her find her own way. No matter how she feels, if she receives only love and care from you, she will ultimately recognize you are great. Don't waste your energy blaming dad. That's his issue. But you keep your focus on loving your daughter and supporting her. 13 is a tough age for a girl and she needs her mother's love at this age. Father's can't replace that love. Even a step mom isn't the same as mom.

Oh my God! This is exactly what I am living! I decided to go on the internet tonight to reach out and see if there was ANYONE who could understand. My daughter is 13 also and I have the SAME situation. I can't take it. And I support all of us!! I pay alimony AND child support even though we have 50/50 custody. He constantly brainwashes her about me and today she tossed out that she may go and live with her father. This is crazy! I've been the best mother AND supported all of us and continue to. He is so angry at me, he harrasses me, he harrasses my friends, the courts are no help, and still I'm made out to be the bad guy. It's crushing. It's so very crushing. And I have taken the high ground the entire time - got crushed financially for being nice and thought at least that would make him happy so we could just focus on raising our daughter. It's all about him all the time - never about her. He just wants to spite me. It's crazy.

Sorry to hear it. My daughter decided on her own to turn against me, so I have no advice except to wait it out. Maybe she'll come to her senses when she's a little older.

I am having problems with the ex's girlfriend. She tells my kids bad things about me when the go to visit them every other weekend. My kids are 6 and 8. I get no support from the breeder and was wiped financially in the divorce. The courts are no help. They have filed false abuse allegations on my current husband and have been ordered a cease and disist order from the states attorney. She forges my signiture, impersonates me at the doctors office and the legal system will do nothing. My son who is 6 can't stand me and up until 6 months ago I was his world. this girl is unstable and it hurts so badd that kids don't like me. I support them. They don't want for anything with me and I can't even get a hey mom because of that women.

First, realize that 13 year old girls and their mothers are often at odds. So, the divorce may only be a factor. I have to referee between my tween and her mother all the time, and we're happily married. Secondly, keep a cool head and don't react to everything she says or does. And try hard not to over-react. Teenagers are under a lot of pressure. Continue to be her mom, whether she likes it or not.