Any advice on being the sole caretaker of an elderly parent? dont say "kill her"!!
by 
sophiesmom
ANSWERS: 8
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My advice would be to make sure you have some time to pamper yourself. This is an extremely emotionally and physically demanding situation. You can only take care of your parent if you, yourself, is taken care of. Also, if you can afford it, or if an agency can help you, make sure you have someone trustworthy to come and help out sometimes. It may also help to get a cleaning person every other week just to keep your life from becoming overwhelming. Best of luck.
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patience, compassion and understanding. Remember who took care of you when you were unable to. I cannot imagine anyone saying "kill her"..that is just awful.
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Always remember that without her, you would not even be here. Recall the time when you were too young to wipe your own ass, to clean your own genitals, to tie your own shoelaces.
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As Molecule said, make sure you maintain a sense of your own life and take care of yourself. It's extremely demanding to care for an elderly person, particularly if there are medical issues. There are many agencies that can assist you, depending on you mother's insurance. You can also find private citizens in the paper who are looking for part-time work caring for people. Don't be afraid to ask for help. By the time you're starting to feel overwhelmed, you're already taking on too much. Good luck.
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I took care of my Mother during her last few years, but thank goodness, only her mind was gone. She could still walk and follow instructions and feed herself. I agree with Molecule that you need to get outside help. Call you local council on aging and find out what agencies can provide help for you. If you are active in a church, sometimes they can provide assistance.
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It can be a draining experience just remember as much as you love this person you must make some time for yourself! It is also important to be able to ask for help from someone you trust very much. I know how this experience can be I hope everything turns out well for you and her. And the comment "kill her" is very disrespectful I hope you haven't had to hear that.
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Check and see if there is any elder daycare facilities near you that you could take them to occasionally. A break for yourself now and then will do both of you a world of good. Take care and best wishes.
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don't kill her?
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