ANSWERS: 16
  • you should fake your death and move to another state change your name and never look back ... just playing man you should just be upfont with the whole thing unless she is the agressive type then i recomend that just play it cool and dissapoint her little by little not too much to send her over the edge but enough to get her to think this isn't going to work out so eventually she brings it up and all you have to do is play it cool and agree. by the way ive never tried it or seen it done so im not sure but you can try ir if you want. good luck buddy
  • You're faced with a difficult situation. On one side, you have a loving relationship that countless people would kill to be in; on the other, you have the anthropological nature to mate...and it sounds like you aren't sexually attracted to your wife. Sooner or later, you may make the mistake of cheating on her, at which point a divore will get much more painful. I don't understand completely if you and your wife find eachother attractive enough to prevent divorce from happening...but if you say you're like 'brother and sister', then sex may not be in favour. On top of that, I'm not sure of how strong your will is to prevent yourself from making a bad decition. My advice to you, is to seek advice from a real professional...a marriage councillor. A marriage with someone who you find to be a brother or sister, (not litterally of-course), is something you shouldn't pass up so easially. If sex is, however, a primary desire, then I'm not sure of what to advice.
  • What are you afraid of? Do you enjoy being alone? Are your needs being fullfilled? Did you ever think she might be unhappy, unfulfilled, or is she just using you because you are there. If she made a choice of leaving you, not being honest with you about her desire not to have sex, making choices for the both of you, then, you should have moved on a long time ago. Life is too short not to be fulfilled. There are alot of wonderful women out there who want and desire a healthy relationship. Do you remember how it felt to be desired? Go for it. Be happy.
  • There is no best time to tell her. Be honest. Obviously emotionally you have already left her. Is there someone else? Don't wait. There will always be something that comes up or something else that needs to be done. If your life with her hasn't changed in 15 years it isn't going to now. You can't be responsible for her choices. I am sure there is more to the fact she didn't want a sexual relationship with you anymore. It sounds like she is self centered in makning choices that affect both of your lives. I am not pointing the finger. Be mature. Don't get caught for another 15 years. Chose to be happy. Don't wait.
  • Do you like being alone in a relationship? Did she ever enjoy sex or did she just perform until she knew you were there to stay. I don't mean to be cruel. Maybe she never did enjoy it. Did you talk to her about it or did she always manage to avoid talking about the real issue. Do you like being on the outside looking in? Ask yourself questions? Do you miss being intimate with a woman? Don't think about it anymore. You wouldn't be asking the question if you weren't ready to move on. Just walk in and say "let's talk". Be hnest. Don't put blame on anyone. Just tell her you want more in life. Leave now don't wait another day.
  • You are already living a lie by thinking about divorce. You are wrong by not talking to her and getting it done now. Step up and take responsibility for yourself. Don't live a lie anymore. Don't pretend everything is alright. Holidays are coming up. Let her move on with her life and you move on with yours. Good luck!
  • I think there are more problems than you were able to share. Life is short. Be happy. I lived in a marriage of convenience for 10 years. When I told her I wanted a divorce. it was emotional, but when I left I felt a huge burden lifted off my shoulders and wished I had done it sooner.I met a great women, who is truly my best friend and soul mate. You can have that too. Everyday you wait is one less day of true happiness for you and perhaps her. Leave when you tell her because it saves both of you hurt. Go back and get you things later. Give you both time to grieve and move on. You will grieve because it was part of your life!
  • If you have already decided you want a divorce why are you askling how to do it. Just tell her and move on. Good luck!
  • You like living with your "sister"? Or do you want a warm body. Get going and move on.
  • Is it going to take another 15 years to move on. Decide what you want tell her and move out. There are alot of women who want more than a brother to live with!
  • What are you waiting for? Just set her down and sat let's talk. Be honest. Listen to her Let her cry, yell, whatever. Tell her you care for her but don't love her. Hold her. hug her. Then leave. I have had friends do it both ways. I left. Leave the guilt behind because that is only temporary! Hopefully you have planned ahead and have somewhere to go or call a friend. Make arrangements to get your things when she is not there. Go forward and don't look back!
  • Wow what a decision. Can you continue to live like that or are y9ou really ready to move on. It seems you you thought you were stuck and maybe it was suppose to be like that. Trust me it's not. Been there. I sat my exwife down and told her what was missing in my life. She didn't have a clue. We both moved on and now I am married to a wonderful woan and we met both of our needs, It has never been so good! Don't wait, it isn't worth it but the future is. Best of luck!
  • What ever you do, DO SOMETHING!! And do it soon. If I understood your Question correctly, you have wasted 15 years being miserable about the lack of physical love in your marriage. If this is correct, talk to her or talk with a counselor. Even filing divorce papers is movement, and you haven't been moving much, have you? This is up to you to fix, and it is fixable.
  • Do you really want a divorce? Why would you need to ask advise if you truly wanted out? Is there someone else? If there is, it isn't fair to anyone. If you are in a sexual relationship with someone else and that is the reason you now what to get a divorce, do it before you hurt both of them. If there isn't anyone else then get it over because there are women who want a physical relationship. Luck to you!
  • hi! i am a producer for the mike and juliet show in nyc. we are doing a segment with a famous 'divorce buster' and are looking for couples that may be looking for help in saving their marriage- please email me asap at morning_show@hotmail.com or call me at 212-301-5256 if you are still looking for help. Thanks so much and I hope to hear from you soon- we are taping this fri 1/18 in NYC and would provide all transportation and hotel...
  • Hi I know excatly what you are talking about. You Put the nail on the head. I am in a brother and sister relationship also. I never thought of it that way until now. I have been married 30 years in a few months it will be 31yrs. For the last 2 years he went fishing with his buddy on our anniversary, do you know how that made me feel? I wrote him a long letter and told him that I Wasn't in love with him any longer But I will always love him. I told him I wanted a divorce and I told him how he wouldn't do things for me that I have asked him to do for me for 30 years. I do ANYTHING he wants me to for him, When the act is being performed and is over for him he didn't even touch me once! Doesn't care if He does anything for me, He will say Thank you...when he is finished, And I say I enjoyed it also ( being a smartass ) If possible for you can get out, don't be miserable another 20 years~! The one thing I have is that My husband became disabled after a car accident, it is not that he can't walk or anything. It has to do with his back and ankle. So I am stuck forever...

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