u cant for sure i guess u will just "have to"

It took a lot of effort to read your question. I am still not certain I got all the words right since you didn't actually spell them. I also have no idea who she wants to break up with. Can you clarify please?

honestly i dont think that you can trust her, she has been dating locally the whole time, and she has been lieing to you about it. so id find someone else. now iv been in a long distance realtionship my self for over 7 years, and i know that i trust him totaly and he can trust me. good luck.

Sorry if I was unclear. 1. We've been together for 1 month in a long distance relationship. 2. We "sparkled" during a weekend, when we met again after 1 year we knew each other. At that time she told me she was single. I told her that I wouldn't have started a long distance relationship if I was not serious about it (i.e. I was NOT casually dating). She told me she liked me and wanted to see how things worked out. We both agreed we were going to see each other soon. 3. We called each other every day and then, 2 weeks after we met for a full week (which was not trivial, money and time wise) half-way. During the week I told her I felt in love with her. She confirmed she really liked me but that she needed more time together to call it a "serious" relationship. She was start planning possible relocation. Still, she never told me the words "I love you" while I was telling her so. 4. In the last 10 days she intensified the calls, the plans to move temporarely here and even if she was saying that she missed me, she was still stiff and cautious about "overstatement", masking them as "careful judgement" of the situation and saying that after all we were still dating... it was "just a month...". Today I asked again if she was dating someone and she blew out saying yes (including having sex), that she tried to break up with him right after we decided to start our relationship but that she "chickened out" at the last second, that she is going to break up with that guy immediately and that she wants to stay with me, that she was not faking affection during the time we spent together, etc. etc. I don't know what to believe.

Wow When I ask for claification, I really get it! I am a lot like your lady friend in that I am overly cautious and slow to say things that seem to come so easily to others. This is due, in part, to my need to be truthful. If I am not 100% certain, I won't say 'I love you'. She was honest with you when you asked her directly. I agree that she should have been honest with you when you first met, but you were not someone she knew or saw as a permenant fixture in her life right then. Not telling you a lot of things makes perfect sense. I think she may have simply felt this was none of your business right then. She may have felt that she could tell you when it became 'your business', and she did when she realized that it was that important to you. I think it is fair to assume that she was very, very attracted to you. She was attracted enough to explore the possibility of a relationship with you, contributing her time (and money?) to your time together. You are moving very fast. Perhaps too fast for her. I know it would be for me, and I would begin to back-paddle to try and slow it all down. If you continue to press her for committment to a relationship before she even gets a chance to know who you are, she will dissappear. Fast. SLOW DOWN. This isn't supposed to be a race. * This is all my opinion, based in my own experience and your very clear clarification! You will know if it applies to your situation.

1 month is too soon to tell someone you are serious about them. 1 month is too soon to build trust, especially in long distance relationship. The relationship is not strong enough to survive with distance. If she wanted to break up with the other guy, she would just do it. When a woman is done with a guy, she is done. If you are giving her money, stop giving her money and see what happens. In relationship character and ethics, you don't hold on to one person until you get another one. Most cheaters don't admit it until they get caught, and some will not even if you catch them in the act. Take care of you.

Don't waste your time. Get rid of her. If she did it before, she'll do it again.