I wish. I really do... but I don't know how, he's my bloody father - what am I going to say?!?!?!??!

I'm on the verge of some sort of 'scene' with my Mother. I've already decided my brother is not worth the effort and I will not be treated like a doormat any longer. Eventually, I can see me just not bothering with her either. Her any my brother are welcome to each other. She's on holiday at the moment - when she gets back it can take her anything up to 6 weeks to bother to phone me. This would be neither here nor there, except for the fact that I have a 3 year old child with whom she built some sort of relationship. So, to cut a long story short, I'm keeping my mouth shut for my child's sake, not my own. What about you then?

I've cut out my brother and my biological dad. And it was less painfull then having to deal with them. My brother is now just some druggie at the homeless shelter for me. Oh and a big laugh when he gets arrested again. My dad I don't even think about. He could care less about me so I could care less about him. He doesn't even know he has two grandsons. And I like it that way.

With my Father-in-law. He broke me into pieces. Until now, I'm still finding my way on how to forgive him.

i have had to do it with my bio-father and it was a really sad and hard decision but one has to draw ones boundaries. i have forgiven him because he lives a sad solitary life but i couldn't help him. you can't choose your family but you can choose to not take their sh*t!

Yes..you should (if safe) tell them why you are leaving and want nothing to do with them. It is cathartic.

Oh boy. I have been there and done that one. Basically still doing it. I have to cut family ties from all sides of the family. My mom never calls me and says that I should be the one calling her cause I am her daughter. This was before I even moved to a different location. I would only see her maybe at most once a week. Some holidays I would never see her. Yet she gets so aggravated if I don't at least call her for mother's day. The person that raised me is my aunt, my mother only provided some money when my uncle lost his high paying job. My bio-logical dad was never in the picture, and tried to deny he was even my father. I haven't met him and he died last year. Then the person that raised me used to steal money from me all the time. Though I still talk to her cause she at least does care about me, even a small bit. Then my husband's mother is a real controling woman who wants to run my life. She even told her own son that he doesn't control his life, she does. Plus she basically has proven to me that she hates me, so I don't talk to her unless I really have to. I have other reasons for not talking to her, I don't want to go into full detail. Though yes, I do believe that sometimes even though it doesn't seem right by societies standards, you have to do what you have to do sometimes. I think that if it is really that unbearable that if you try to fix it and it still doesn't work out, it is best to just go on with your own life without them. It is sad that things have to go to that level, but never feel bad. They are the ones that gave you that reason to leave.

I was blessed to have a close friend (who just happened to be a family counselor) say to me that at some point, if you are being abused, if you've tried everything you can to make it work, if the relationship is destructive and painful; to preserve your own mental well being...you gotta call it a day. And I did, with my Mom...and yes, people will constantly say, "But that's your ______!!!" So be it.

It comes to a point where their abuse don't effect me, as though I grew immunity to it.

Not me, but I am so sorry that it has come to that for you. I have had to set boundaries before and I applaud you for doing that for yourself. All the best to you. - Tom

I told my father he is dead to me, as well as my step-mother. For years and years they have been the holier-than-thou born again Christians, all while my father was forcing himself on my step-sisters and his wife was enabling it.

I have come to the point in my life where I am largely emotionally separated from my Mother. Our family propensity for depression comes from her side and she is deeply in the throes of long-term depression. The problem is that she won't admit it or seek treatment. My brother and I have both pointed out to her how her behavior is textbook depression, but she refuses to listen to us. I still love my Mother and I wish her the best, but I'm done compensating for her mental state when she won't do anything about it herself. Thankfully, I'm still on very good terms with my siblings.

I was respectful , kind and loving and just ignored all the bad. At 18 yrs old I hit the door running and never looked back.

My mom is the only reason I have not walked away from the rest of my family and not looked back..she, my kids and hubby are all the real family I have.

GOOD FOR YOU !!!

I tried for years to have healthy relationships with my siblings and it got to the point where it was just taking its toll on me to have any contact with them. I regret that it has come to this and I do try to reach out to them every few years. So far, it has not made any difference. It is still toxic.

Not family but roommates. My point being is that I suffered them much longer than I should have, and that's just roommates. I'm guessing everyone else here has suffered much longer than they should have even more so.

I have cut contact with my parents in the past. Unfortunatly that meant cutting contact with my whole family including extended family. We are back in contact now and although things are far from perfect they are better. It is a hard decision to make. I am not saying that you should or should not stop talking to your father. I am saying that you should think about the consequences b/c usually it is permanent. Why not just not go over there. You don't actually have to say I am never going to speak to you. Just tell him that his behavior hurts your feelings and until he changes it you aren't going to come over. If you want you can still maintain email or phone contact.

Stillme, I've made that decision, but for graduation I have to open that door again.

Good for you. Just because they are your blood, it doesn't mean you have to take any crap off them. They should be the ones you can count on when you need them, not the ones who shove your face in the dirt.

I have nothing to do with any of my family either. My mom is nuts and my brothers and sister follow her.