I can't give blow jobs. Ive tried but I am grossed out to the point of getting sick. It's gotten to the point where I consider never being in a sexual relationship again so that I dont feel like I have to do it. Is it really that important?
by 
T..I..L..A.. feels like wreaking havoc
ANSWERS: 17
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Don't worry about it. The man that is right for you won't care. Out of curiosity...do you like to have your pussy licked? In other words, would you want a guy to lick your pussy, even though you wouldn't give him oral sex??
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I do..but I wouldnt ask for it. If the guy does it on his own and LIKES doing it, then I wouldnt tell him to stop ;-) But on the other hand, if I knew he didnt enjoy it and was trying to force himself to do it for my benefit, I would ask him to stop.
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You can't do it, you can't do it. If it's something you can't face then the guy who can accept that is a keeper. And yes, I've met dudes who are turned off by the notion of his penis in a woman's mouth. Or anyone else's for that matter. Personally, I'd appreciate being told up front (before getting intimate, but not on the first date). As to me, lack of BJ isn't a deal breaker when it comes to lovers, I'm sure other dudes would feel the same. Have you explored WHY you react so?
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My daughter hates them and doesn't do it either. I never had a problem but I don't even care about sex or relationships anymore, so don't go by me being a current expert, that's for sure. I have never had a desire for sex unless I was so totally in love and involved in a relationship that being all giving was a pleasure. There is too much obligatory sex these days, I don't get that. Like, "Hi we've been dating for a few seconds and you've taken me out to dinner so let's have at it. It don't work really well that way for me.
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Tila, I would not take it to that extreme. If you are honest & up front with any man who really cares for you deeply (& that is the key word) it won't matter. The relationship can develop in many wonderful ways. I have been dating for some time and I know how difficult it is to find that 'special someone'. Don't think negatively or put yourself down. You will see who really cares and you will be fine. Good Luck! (((HUGS))) Your Friend, Jonathan +5
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Oral sex is important to some people but not the glue that holds a relationship together. There comes a point in a relationship when you discuss expectations of sex. You'll find that talking about an issue with your loved one will usually help you or them overcome that issue, whether you choose to give oral or he chooses NOT to receive oral. I prefer oral sex in a relationship. The decision factor with breaking up with one of my girlfriends was that she didn't like to give oral. There were other issues at hand, but given the circumstances, that was the deal breaker for me to determine that the relationship wasn't worth pursuing.
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When your ready and if your ever ready you will know if and want to. No one should have to do anything sexually they are not comfortable with. I agree with you in your comments about not letting them do something they dont want. If they really care about you, they will respect you anough to understand. Hang in there! One of these days it might not gross you out anymore and you'll be like... yeah baby! I want to drive him nuts! But untill then, Stick to your guns and only date guys that will respect your feelings! Points given! Robin
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Sexual compatibility is *extremely* important in a relationship, so make sure if you can't get past this that you find a guy for whom oral is truly not important. Unfortunately our society makes people ashamed of their sexual desires, and so he may be willing to lie to himself and to you by saying that it isn't important, but problems will most definitely come up later. Just look at the other answers given here to see what I am talking about. Many people imply that he is some kind of uncaring a-hole jerk if it is a deal breaker. Don't ever be pressured in to doing something you don't like sexually. The best way to never be pressured into something you don't like to do is to find someone that you are compatible with in the first place.
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No, it's not important. He'll cheat anyways(even if you did do it), so why trouble yourself?
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well don't expect any oral in return
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So what about it grosses you out?
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As for me personally...yes, it is really that important.
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Maybe you never found the right person to do it. I once had a girlfriend in her thirties who told me she did not like giving BJs until she met me... And considering how inexperienced she seemed in the beginning, I'inclined to believe her
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i'll be honest ... it's not that big a deal to me ... i'd much rather give than receive ... i would prefer a nice handy over a bj almost any day
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I hate it too. I used to do it all of the time with my husband and loved doing it when I was younger. Now, I can't stand it and don't want to do it. My husband understands and won't force me to do anything I don't want to. I told him if it's that important to have a blowjob, he can let our gay friend do it. When he said the offer was sweet, he isn't gay or bi. I told him to close his eyes and he wouldn't know who sucked him.
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Is your man clean? Is he making you choke on it? mabe he is too large and inconsiderate of this fact. Mabe it's not that important. I have to say make sure when before you engage in a relationship. Get everything in the open so niether of you feels cheated in the expectation department. You know not everyone requires as much sex. You can see from peoples awnsers here some are perfectly happy with abstinence. Furthermore they are not afraid to compel everyone to be the same.
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Interesting answers to your question. Personally I would say don't worry about it. Life is a lot more complex than one sex act. If you really dislike something and I try to make you do it, I'm the biggest idiot in the world and I'm going to lose in the long run. When it comes to sex I want you to enjoy every second, love everything we do, and be totally into everything. Look at your wording. Your thinking of nonsexual relationships? If I don't get a single blowjob, but you are so into our sex life that you're thinking of how you can't wait to rip my clothes off as soon as you see me how can I not come out ahead. (Bad pun sorry) And I would still give you all the oral sex you could take. Relationships are about thousands of things, not one sex act.
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