We're in foreclosure.

Tell her it isn't convenient and that you have already INVITED some friends to stay so there won't be room. Suggest that maybe she book in to a hotel if she still wishes to visit. If you don't get aling there can be little concern for damaging the relationship - no need to be rude but be firm!

We have a busy schedule with events taking place in our home that will not accommodate any visitors. Please check with ____________for future visits, they have lots of room and time.

Well; I would tell her that I have TEN male friends coming in for a "Guys" Get Together for a Month ... and that as part of the "Spiritual Bonding Experience" we will all be NUDE unless we are leaving the house .... I do believe that dear Aunt Ruth will go stay elsewhere ...

I'm sorry to disappoint you, *(NOT)* Aunt Ruth, but at no time in the next six months or so *(perhaps when I grow tits and a uterus!)* is it going to be possible for you to come and stay with us. I'm about to loose my mind, *(at the thought of a month with you)* and I'm afraid you would not be comfortable at all. *(especially once my brain implodes at one of your many annoying comments and I choke the living chit out of you)* I'm sure you are aware of what the economy has been like lately *(and feeding you and trying to keep you entertained for a month, might just be the end of my fun money account with absolutely NO FUN FOR ME)* and it is affecting my peace of mind intolerably! I would be a poor host, *(IF I were to beat you to death with a baseball bat)* and I will not subject you to my current situation. *(which was relatively pleasant, until you called! dear)* I will, of course, be sure to let you know, if things improve here, *(like hell)* so that you might consider a visit at some other future point in time *(after I have dropped dead of natural causes.)* THANK YOU FOR UNDERSTANDING. *(I'm trying to be POLITE, HERE, I don't really care if you understand, as long as your bags stay in your own closet!)* I really MUST GO NOW. *(NO REALLY...I HAVE TO GO, like 10 minutes ago! WHEW!)*

HA, I wouldn't even give an excuse - "sorry, that is not going to happen, but I can get you the number for a hotel"

This is something I've got to do before this summer. I've decided to tell the truth and let the bricks fall where they may.

Who's Uncle Ruth? Have I ever met her before?

If she is wealthy Aunt Ruth, tell her it might be nice, but ask her to send a copy of her will several weeks in advance. In addition, ask her for Power of Attorney, her Medical Directive and DNR order. That ought to do it! :-) +5

Tell her the house is infested with body lice.

If Aunt Ruth doesn't get along with me, why would she want to stay at my house? I'd say Aunt Ruth prepared to have your old bones begging for blunts and booze because THAT'S how WE do it! Also does Aunt Ruth have any 45-55 year old alright looking friends who are sluts?

I would say how rude it was of her to assume she could just turn up and stay uninvited. Then I would explain that I am sorry but I do not want her at my house and see little point as we don't get on anyway. I would then wish her well and hang up.

Didn't you tell her that your house is filled with crabs from all the prostitutes that regularly visit you? I'd try to work in an std or two, just to get Aunt Ruth fearful of visiting this year... ;) jk Can't you share Aunt Ruth w other relatives too?

Tell her that her body odor is too strong, and you just ran out of deodorant and air fresheners. If she then shows up at your house with a bag of deodorant ready, take the bag of deodorant and leave her on the porch empty handed. She leaves, you have your house to yourself, and you got a nifty little bag of de-ode to make ya smell good for a long, long time. Everyone wins(except little Aunt Ruth, of course).

tell her that you are ill and that the doctor suggests that you possibly have a strain of SARS...and should avoid contact with people.

Well, since Aunt Ruth must live out of town and tells me she's coming to stay at my house for a month; I tell her "sorry Aunt Ruth but we do not have enough room for you at our house." What hotel do you plan to stay in? Would you like me to get the phone number for you.

Gee I was just diagnosed as a carrier for TB; and I am told it will be at LEAST a month for the treatments to rid me of the infection. I am SO sorry, but I would not risk having you come down with TB by my fault..... and you would not want to break the quarantine, would you?

explain your work has made you go out of town, for more training and you will be gone for at least three of the four weeks

Well Aunt Ruthie! I gots some bad bad news for yah! My house is infested with bed bugs...Yah, thems nasty little critters! They tell me they will have to tent my house for a whole entire month! Sorry, you can't stay with me! *GRIN*

Tell her u got a virus ,dude

Dear Aunt Ruth....sorry but no deal. Nobody comes to our house to stay for 30 days.....and most people in our lives would either wait for an invitation or never assume that anything more than an overnight would be appropriate. As always, you are showing rude and inconsiderate behaviour. Why don't we just get real and honest with each other? No. No excuses. You are simply not welcome.

No thanks I already hired a maid.

Blame it all on the global finiancial crisis! ;)

Honesty is the best policy.. Auntie Ruth.. i really don't like you so go find a box or motel room to hide your hat in this time. Nothing personal.. no wait, yes it is.. The answer is NO WAY! That would work for me. ;)

If you can not say no, just do a lot of smiling and nodding while she is there.

I don't think you should make excuses. Just be honest. Remind her that the two of you don't get along and you don't want any more stress. You can't go wrong if you are honest. :D

Tell her she can't come while keeping the reason vague. Say,"I'm very sorry Aunt Ruth, but I am going through some personal things right now and won't be able to host you. Take Care now." If she asks what's going on, say it's personal. There's no lie there, you just don't want her around and that's a personal thing if you want it to be!

If I was in that situation, I'd do the following: 1. No, there's no extra room here. That's it. you need make NO excuses, if they cannot handle honesty, they need to wise up. And YOU need to stand FIRM!

"Really, a month? We'd love to have you, but please bring some masks, rubber gloves, and large amounts of Lysol and hand sanitizer. You see, we've all contracted a bad case of Staph infection from the leprosy."

BE HONEST! Tell her you understand she wants to stay, but you don't feel her staying would benefit your relationship together and may make it worse, and NIETHER of you DONT want that! Suggest kindly other places to stay and explain you would enjoy inviting her over for dinner instead.

No excuses needed! "Aunt Ruth, there are many hotels in our city, and I'll email you a list of them. Hope to see you for dinner one time during your visit to our town!"

Tell her "That's great, unfortunately John and I will be unable to host you this time, but we'd be glad to make a reservation at a nearby motel if you like."

I'd have her over anyway. In the time we're together, I'd try to work on the problems that we've been having with each other. If you give excuses, eventually she'll find out the hard way.

I don't like you we don't get along don't come to my house unless of coures she's rich and not healthy

I would tell her I'm so embarrassed but we have roaches and no matter what we've tried we can't seem to get rid of them. Or, tell her you've taken in a homeless person and there's no room. If she's waiting for an answer I wouldn't give her one. There's always call block too. And spam on your email. Change your phone number. And kill any family member that gives it to her. Yet another: we're having our house remodeled. We converted the two bedroom's to one. We're storing a friends' belongings until they move into their new house so there's no room. Good Luck.

Dear Auntie Ruth............ The bug man has just left our house. he stated we have the worst case of bed bugs and fleas he has ever seen. he stated that he was about to set off an area bomb to kill the pests. He suggested we leave home for at least 30 days as the bomb fumes are very toxic. This email is being sent to you from the sandy beaches of Montego Bay, Jamaica. We decided to take our vacation now, instead of next month. even our dog ran away from home. You are welcome to come and stay at our house. The key is under the mat. I would suggest you bring a face mask, a can of OFF, and some flea powder. Please do not double-park your broom at the front door. Love, us.

2nd Answer. Just been evicted. Furniture and beds are on the street. You are welcome to come. Its raining. be sure to bring an umbrella and some dark glasses. The neighbors are taking pictures. Its the rainy season