Learn to be scary and learn to scream/yell at people good. I tried but my sibs say that I am really Really bad at trying to scream/yell/be scary. -____- I know because my little sister thinks the oldest (brother) is scary so she respects him more than me, and I am not so scary. So you could try that. :

You need to learn about who you are and why you are a good person. You should then think about the way you like to be treated, and how you act towards other people. This will then lead you to see why the actions of some people are actually wrong, they should not be doing X or Y and if they do, you should feel comfortable with calling someone on it. Next, you need to become independent. Not completely solo, we all need someone, but built a range of friends who you can speak to. This will help build your confidence in you as a person, and in your ability to stand up to others (seeing as you know that you have friends who support you). [This answer could be better, however it's the best I can come up with so far...]

The psychology term for this is "weak boundaries" -- i.e. you're a warm and likable person, and are somewhat underdeveloped in the area of "pushing back" against those who aren't respectful of your territory. The fact that you recognize the issue is good, of course. What you have to learn to do is be aware of when someone is stepping over the line, and start learning appropriate ways to push back. There's no single "right" way to do this, you'll want to respond to people in a way that is tuned to your own personality. But being able to say "no", or being able to tell someone that you don't feel comfortable with the way they're being, or in some cases being able to just tell someone to get lost -- those are important skills to have. You probably won't ever be an Auntie Em type (she can scare the bejesus out of many hardened criminals), but you can learn to maintain healthy boundaries and train those around you to respect them. Just keep paying attention and working at it.

Contrary to the age old adage, I have learned that words can be louder and more effective than actions. I've always been a pretty tough cookie, but never physically intimidating. I learned a long time ago to look someone dead in the eye and say something cold and calculating in a even, low but firm tone. Some of the cleaner examples would be: "I will clear my life of all other priorities, and fixate on you as the instrument of my destruction, and you will never feel safe in your world again." "You're gonna wake up at about 3:00 one morning, and I'm gonna be standin over your bed." No matter what you say, the key is to stand your ground, and at least make them consider your words. If you place an inkling of doubt in their mind, you've won. It's always worked for me, anyway.

Believe it or not, I learned a lot about standing up for myself while working retail. I worked as a supervisor in a video store, where one of my tasks was calling people who had movies that were significantly overdue. I would have people who would swear at me, call me names, insult me, etc... That's when I learned the phrase, "You have no right to speak to me that way." I also liked something along the lines of: "Insulting me will not get you what you want." I also learned to tell people (who were not so polite most of the time) "No." I even asked people to leave my store because their behavior towards me, or my employees, was unacceptable. I still don't like confrontational situations, and my instincts are usually telling me to leave, run away! just do whatever they want to get this to stop! And sometimes, that's just fine. It's not always bad avoid those situations, or to simply walk away. But, there will be times when you know you are right, and people are treating you unacceptably, and you have to learn how to say that. It's hard, it's hard for me too, but I think that when the situation comes up, I will be able to do what I need to do, even if I don't like it.

I have found that if you confront people that treat you badly usually makes the situation worse. It is like two forces colliding. In some forms of martial arts they say take the force of a blow and redirect it.It is easier and no damage is done.I work behind the scenes in film and confrontation is not advisable for you could be sent off the set.When someone is angry at me I mentally deflect what they have to say,by not saying anything in return and not showing any emotions.Then inside myself I imagine,quite intensely, only good thoughts about this person.At least 9 out of 10 times the person would come up to me and apologies explaining their situation.This definitely works,and is not cowardly.I learned this from reading Mahatma Ghandi, a man I respect greatly.

I had a friend who had a similar problem ... he took up boxercise classes and then moved on to real boxing and Tai Chi for self control ... he is know a different person with plenty of confidence ... Here is a picture of him before and after ...

There is some very good advice from people already, so I'm not going to repeat any of that. But one tip that may or may not work, and that I find helps me, is to modify your walk slightly. Don't be too exaggerated (if you watch Grease, Danny's strut is *not* the target!) but take a deep breath in, which helps to straighten your back and reduces the slump in your shoulders. This is the poise you should have - straight back, shoulders back. Then walk with this position, swing the shoulders a *little*. This makes your gait pattern more confident (as well as improving your posture) and may seem strange and possibly uncomfortable at first, but if you maintain it it soon becomes second nature. It makes you seem more confident, which influences how others see you, and therefore your interactions with other people. And of course, confidence breeds confidence, so it accumulates.

Keep a mental picture of the sort person you want to be...then BE it! It's not as hard as it sounds, you can be it if you stick to it.

I myself am one as well, but lately I've been standing up for myself, I'm not quite sure what made me do it, but I felt enough was enough, just try to do certain things to raise your self esteem enough to get the courage to stand up for yourself.

that is actually easy. BELIEVE IN YOURSELF. KNOW THAT YOU MATTER. STAND STRONG.

I was just the same way. It was like I had a subsconcious block. However, I spoke to a new friend of mine who used to be a victim. She gave me the greatest advice I have ever heard on this subject. She learned he below strategy in Alanon. With her outstretched arm ,she made a hand stop sign in front of me and said, "This is where you end, and this is where I begin.". I finally GOT ITt!!! I guess my subsconcious just needed the visual without too much mumbo jumbo. Our subsconcious understands symbols better than logic.

Oooh Goodness, I have been in the exact same position and I am just now crawling out of that hole. The thing is, you probably dont like to irritate, annoy, or have people dislike you in any way. So you let them walk all over you because you know that if you stood up for yourself, they wouldnt like you, and that hurts. But you have to do it sometime or else youll be in this position forever. So just say no when you dont want to do something. Dont let people try to sway what you say or what to do. Sure, you might lose a couple friends, but its worth it, it is SO worth it. Best of luck.

Use ur consiouce mind which is your abililty to think reason and CHOOSE to train your subconciouse mind (your instincts, automatic thoughts) to stand your ground and engage your enemy. Repeat it to yourself, the same way you pray, and over time, it will become part of u. Problem solved. P.S. Dont use negative, use positive. Example, instead of saying "I will NOT run away" to yourself, say "I WILL stand my ground." It takes time, but it will help. Next time an opportunity strikes, remember that you have a CHOICE, furthermore u have a RIGHT to protect your space from ANY invasion. This stuff can help u anything from becoming fearless, to being go getter, to quitting smoking... Just use positive messaging and do it every 3 hours for about 2 weeks. I was 3 year smoker and it took me 10 days to quit completely. No luck needed, just stick with the program. 2 weeks is nothing, take it as seriouse as if you were on parole, and if scrued up, would had go back to spend a lifetime in confinement(low self). BE yourself, and instead getting people who dont like your real side to like you, you will find people who will like your real side, thats priceless. Its lik being paid for your hobby. But BE YOURSELF. BE Genuine and Honest and keep your word, when u give it to others, thats your Reputation, thats how you will earn the respect of others. NO PAIN NO GAIN. No person has evered achieved anything without suffering. You WILL Suffer in the beginning, as you will lose most of your friends, but you will get whole lotta more. US constitution allows everyone to PURSUE HAPPINESS, because HAPPINESS is in FREEDOM. Freedom from your own self and from everyone else. Free are the happy. If you like controling things, stop it. And dont allow others to control you.

Just say no in a calm and assertive way. One thing when you say yes or no it could be consequences either way. Remember it is better to be respected than liked.

Practice on here! We can't see you or touch you, speak your mind.

Learn to get angry, think of people/things/events that have really pissed you off. Keep that wee flame of anger inside & let it out when people try to take advantage of you. (obviously don`t take it to far & decapitate someone who bumps into you and doesn't apologize.)

You have to remember all the things you've been through and all the things you've learned in your life that have molded you into the person you are, and not standing up for yourself is, in a sense, betraying yourself. With that said, some people are just passive and non-confrontational and thats okay.

See yourself in you mind as a person who doesn't take shit from no body. Visualize this daily in a relaxed position with confidence and it will be your reality.

When you see an "offensive" situation just about to start - don't waste time! Adress the situation immediately. I'm not saying you should Karate chop someone in the throat, but if you send the clear and unmistakable message that you will not be walked on quietly, most sensible people will disengage you at once and treat you with respect. You may feel the threat of someone not liking you, however, in most cases, the result is quite opposite - they will develope respect for you (that is if the way you handled the situation had dignity and calmness.) On the other hand, if you say "no" to people who already know you as a "push-over" are not accustomed to you saying "no", it will not be a simple matter to change their opinion of you. However, be persistant and consistent. How to use the word "No." Only say "no" once. There may be a strong temptation to explain or justify your "no," but the momment you explain or justify yourself to someone else you are in essence admitting that they are an authority in your life that must be appeased. Having self respect means the greatest authority in your life deserving to be appeased is your own concsience.

There are a lot of books to help with assertiveness. You have to really learn that you have worth and deserve to be treated respectively. When you believe that it will be apparent to others.

start by saying "NO" to a request. Already you are not a doormat. A doormat always says 'yes'. Learn to set boundaries. if someone asks you to do a favor for them practice saying 'I'll get back to you about it'. and then think about whether you really want to do the favor or whether you are doing just so the person will like you. If you do really want to help the person and they say 5 O'clock and 5 is not godd for you stop and think what time is good for YOU, not them. let's say its 6. so you tell them 6 O'clock would work better for you. there you have set a boundary. by now you are starting to feel stronger and people are respecting you more.

get a knowledge of law and the situation if they attack you depending on the situation you can use your surroundings as a weapon or a shield.