ANSWERS: 6
  • In the first scenario, I would say "it depends"... for some couples, that might be seen as kinky but acceptable. For others, the woman would feel violated and angry. In the second scenario, I would say "yes", in that it's coerced sex. The coercion is somewhat indirect -- he's not using a gun, but it's still coercion.
  • It depends on the state you live in and whether or not you told him no and asked him to stop when you woke to find him on you. The other is more black mail unless they attacked you and forced you to do it even though you refused. If these things are happening to you with your bf maybe you should get rid of him.
  • Rape is when sex is forced or coaxed out of you when you say no. In the first waking up to the partner being frisky isn't really rape unless you say 'no' or 'stop' and he/she doesn't. The reality is that some people like being waken up with a smile and some play. The latter is not actually rape unless something takes place. The threat is an act of coercion, basically forcing the victim to play along - granted not as bad as having a knife put to your throat, but it is along similar lines where a threat of dire consequences is used to make the person do something do not want.
  • Sometimes I would wake up to my husband having sex with me... I don't think it is rape in my case because he is my marriage mate and is the only one truly allowed to have sex with me. The second scenario leads me to believe that the boyfriend should be taken outside and shot.
  • First scenario: YES if person waking up says NO or is incapable of giving consent. Second scenario: YES, if the act is carried out.
  • Yes and Yes Sleep, drugging alcohol impairment etc do not give a partner or rapist the right to violate you. Sex has to be consensual. Duress, blackmail, intimidation to obtain sex is once again not consensual.

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