Downsize, downsize, and then downsize some more. Get rid of absolutely anything and everything that isn't essential to your daily functioning and well being. Less stuff in the house = less stuff you have to keep cleaning up.

Honey, I have this exact problem at my house. My husband and kids won't do anything around the house. So this is what I did and it worked. I quit doing laundry, except my own because I work in healthcare and need clean clothes, and let thier clothes start piling up. I made sure to let them know what I was doing, so they had fair warning to start helping. They still didn't do anything. So, I didn't wash thier clothes, I didn't clean up thier messes and told them that if they wanted mom to do thier laundry and pick up the house then they had to start helping me. When the day came that each child had to wear dirty clothes because they didn't have any clean ones and my husband realized that he had no owrk clothes, we had finally come to an agreement. When I worked, he would make the kids help me and he would help with dishes and laundry. when I had a day off of work(I only work 3 days a week) I would do the housecleaning and laundry. This is still working till this day. I even have a husband who respects me more and packs my lunch and does extra things. You could also just threaten to leave. I have done that with my kids. I have asked them how they would feel if mom was gone and didn't come back. I have told them that I feel unappreciated and disrespected and I am almost to the point of just not coming home one day. It works, they straightened up on that one too. It may sound mean, but it has to be said for them to get your point. Hope this helps

My mom used to bring my dad a hot episom salt foot bath every night when he came home from work and he wasn't the nicest human being in the universe... I asked her once. Why do you do it all the time when he is such a jerk. She said... "It has absolutely nothing to do with his comfort or his well being, it is because his feet stink and I cant stand it." Because if she actually asked him to wash them, he would have told her to go piss up a rope. My mom was a smart woman... that never seemed to make any kind of sense until you asked her.

my mom once warned me and said "if you don't clean your room, i'm gonna do it for you and you won't like it." The next day my room was clean but all my stuff was gone. She donated all my stuff (except my clothes) to salvation army. I will never forget that lesson... Life is easier with less clutter. Donate all their crap to salvation army when they aren't home, they probably won't even notice what's missing and if they do, they will think twice before disrespecting the household.

I think you should only clean up after yourself like gecko said too. make it known what you are doing and do it. dont do their laundry no matter the consequences. dont do their dishes. dont clean up after them. they will start to notice that you do alot and they will start to appreciate you more. once they realize what you do, sit down with them all and tell them that they all need to come to an agreement on how things are going to work in this house or you will "quit"

If you have to pick the stuff up, you get to do with it what you like. You can only ask someone so many times. I opened their room, threw it on the floor so it piled up and they couldnt even get in the room. Or i opened back door and threw it all out on the back porch. My brother was even more strict, he would throw it away. those kids are never gonna do it if their father doesnt. They are gonna call your bluff, and live with the mess. He is the key to your problem. Thats right, do your own laundry, cook your own meals. You cant cook without clean dishes, can you? be prepared for it to get worse before it gets better, they re gonna wait around for you get sick of the dirt before they do and be the maid again.

Drop the jerk and find someone willing to lend a hand. You deserve better.

Warn them that anything they dont clean up will get thrown away. Anything laying out that they didnt pick up, goes into a trashbag, they dont need to know that you kept it (If you feel inclined to), when they start missing their favorite things and clothes, attitudes change real quick. Be stubborn about it or they wont take you serious. Some people are okay living in filth, you have already told them you dont like it, and they dont care, so get tough.