• Yes, my sweet hubby. He makes me feel loved.
    • Linda Joy
      Aww! That's so sweet!
  • Often, actually. People think I'm highly intelligent, but I'm just slightly above average. Those who know me think that I'm so pure that I've never seen any porn. I have and can even name some of the stars. Things like that. It makes me feel good to be thought of so highly by those who know me but I often wonder what they'd think if they only knew......
    • we are dough 68
      I don't think you are highly intelligent.
    • Linda Joy
      It makes me feel uncomfortable... like I'm somehow perpetuating a fraud.
    • Mr PantsFellDown
      [@ Linda] Don't take this as an insult of any kind, it isn't, but some time with a therapist might help you uncover why it is you won't allow yourself to feel good about you. Did a parent or sibling trash you at a young age and make you believe it? Abuse can do great and lifelong damage... even verbal abuse can be devastating a whole life long. It can be very difficult to break free of a bad reputation someone might have unfairly inflicted on you. I would suggest try positive affirmations. (Like if you walk 40 minutes each day, that would be a good time...and you just pick 2 or 3 statements about yourself or your life that you would LIKE to become true, and just keep saying them over and over again in your head as you walk. Do it every day. You know why this works? because without you even being aware of it, your subconscious is working 24/7 to reinforce whatever stray thought you put into it with a conscious thought. If you think you're unlucky, your subconscious will keep causing you to notice things and think things that seem to reinforce that you actually are unlucky. But if you tell yourself you're lucky, it will work to make that true instead. ANYTHING you tell your subconscious it will make real...and if you're unaware your mind works this way, you may just be tricked by the whole illusion. ....So: just as you should be careful what you tell people you are, because it will stick indelibly, so also take great care what you tell yourself! Be nice to you. Believe you're worth it. Treat you like you'd treat someone else you felt compassion for.
    • Linda Joy
      No offense taken. I see it as the self-help I asked for, I do have a therapist I see regularly. I signed on here to see how far I'm swinging from 'normal' on certain thoughts. Please forgive me if I'm asking something clearly posted elsewhere, I haven't yet learned how to navigate this site. No offense intended, but what are your credentials? And thank you sincerely for your help.
    • Linda Joy
      @Anoname maybe we should just be as honest as possible, correct when we recognize a misconception and allow others to take responsibility for their own thoughts.
    • Anoname
      Sound advice.
  • It feels good for a moment, then after thanking them say that we all have quite a bit more range than we present to others. What if there were no more comparisons to anything, then "better" wouldn't mean anything.
    • Linda Joy
      It is true we tend to see (and also present) the best side. We seldom see the whole. And we often compare the best in others to the worst in us. Everyone has strengths and challenges.
  • What if what you believe you "know" isn't true, and he or she knows better? Maybe you should take their word and go with it. After all, 99% of what gets people by, and thought of as, and able to function as, is attitude. (ie, if you think you're the shit, it doesn't matter if you actually are or not, people will treat you like you are, and you will come to believe it true, so it will actually be. ..You ever hear it said "think it and it shall be"? Well what I learned in life is that people will think you are what you tell them to think you are, grand or pathetic, and they'll just take your word for it (and, be careful, because once you tell them to believe you are, it doesn't change after that. "First impressions" you know.). But it's all imaginary. Like dreaming standing up. Decide to have a good dream. You deserve it.
    • Linda Joy
      Hmmm... how to assure you I think I'm a fairly awesome person without gushing a disgusting arrogance? I do have issues distinguishing fine lines and boundaries. My decision in the conversation was to state the truth as clearly as I was able to see and express it so as not to perpetuate a fraud. Their wrong assumptions (in this instance) are their responsibility. Trying to convince would only have appeared as humility to them. It was not a 'first' impression situation I've known them for years. I believe it was more along the lines of someone seeing what they wanted to see instead of truth. I'm much more comfortable about the whole situation after talking it out here. Again, thank you!
  • All the time,. I am (after all) the office IT guy. I am practically their "god" in everything technology. They think I perform magic and am the technology whisperer. When in fact 50% of the time it's something silly they have done. the other 40% of the time I turn it off and on again.
    • Hardcore Conservative
      Perception, very often, is reality.
  • You can always be better than you think you can. My parents taught me that. And my Drill Instructors reinforced it.
    • Linda Joy
      My parents didn't have very lofty expectations for me. But boot camp, childbirth and child rearing has taught me that I can do things I never thought I could!
    • Hardcore Conservative
      As a parent, I'm trying to instill the same thinking into my daughter.
    • Linda Joy
      My father left when I was 2 so I'm not a wealth of knowledge on that subject. As far as I'm concerned any father who's there for their daughter has earned my respect.
    • Hardcore Conservative
      To me, it's all about one's drive. "You can move mountains. You just have to begin carrying away the small stones." Anything is possible in this life, it just depends on how much you want to work for it.
  • probably but they dont usually tell me
  • Terrible. I was once roped into covering a job for one of our engineers. Sweet old lady was having computer issues and she thought I was the other engineer.
  • I was even higher than they thought haha
  • Well, they are only setting themselves up for disappointment because I may inevitably smash that delusion with my next intake of breath, the utterly ridiculous has a way of entering my brain, and exiting my mouth if only for my own entertainment or to my embarrassment. Throw me a ladder someone, so I can climb out of my next hole, or at least take the shovel off me.
  • People have always thought that I am better than I really am. I guess it has lead to my success in life.

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