what is it you so like about the act when you watch? could becoming a furry satisfy your inner desire or is you really want the knot

First, you say, "occasionally." This suggests that it's not compulsive or addictive behaviour, therefore controllable. Second, you assume it's wrong just to SEE a video of the act. Why? If watching a clip doesn't drive you to do the act, where's the harm? God doesn't care if you watch video clips. It’s no different from watching a horror movie. You don’t go out and murder people by the boatload. Third, this is an exercise in self-evaluation. Does it actually give you pleasure to watch? If so, does the pleasure outweigh the guilt? If it does not give you pleasure, are you secretly and unconsciously punishing yourself? Also ask yourself if you enjoy the feeling of guilt. Fourth, if it’s that bad, you could substitute a neutral-value behaviour for watching the clips. Bake a pie, take a cold shower, masturbate, climb a tree, write a poem. It’s called sublimation, and it works very well for most people. Fifth, you’ve said you are about to marry. This is a double-header, and it assumes you’re not married yet. A: Is it a thing you must solve before you marry? Does your fiancé know about your fixation, or is it a guilty secret that would destroy your marriage? If he knows, you could use the animal clips, and include some X-rated human movies as aphrodisiacs to get you both in the mood for hot passionate lovemaking. By the way, that would be a way to substitute human for animal sex by gradual degrees. B: Are you getting any? If you are not sleeping with your fiancé, a healthy dose of shagging five or six nights a week might focus your interests where they should be. Sixth, If he knows, and doesn’t approve, marriage counselling might be your best bet. Finally, if he doesn’t know, and you can’t sublimate or change your behaviour, you’ll have to let him know. I used to work as a counsellor, but my speciality was not sexual aberration, so this is not professional level advice. I’m just trying to offer some help. Let me know how it turns out.

perhaps if you just set limits on your activities ... i will watch it and masturbate but not think about doing it for real ... its probably more the fantasy of the act than the reality of it that is getting you all hot and bothered

"...BUT NEVER indulging in the act?" What's holding you back?