• When the parents arrive with the children for his birthday, take them aside and ask them about this. Explain that you want your son to feel included and learn the same socialization skills that the other children learn through such parties. Be prepared, though, to hear some pretty lame excuses about why your son isn't getting invited. Just clam up and give a tight smile when such folks are falling all over themselves to make themselves feel better about being a cad. Steer them back to inclusion. :o) Best of luck!
  • That's sad and mean and tacky that they don't reciprocate. However, what type of disability are we talking about? If he has fits of rage or a type of emotional disability, that might be reason for concern about inviting him, BUT I still would if the mother came along. If his disability means in a wheelchair, gee, that should be easy to manage. For his next birthday, take him and a TRUE friend to go do,zoo,etc.
  • You know Ripple I have had the same problem. I don't get it either????? Why not??? But I let my son pick the party goers each year and if he chooses the same ones each time it is his choice and he has to live with it. I wish I could shake the shit out of them and ask their parents WHY WHY!!!! You know cause it has to be the parents cause what kid don't wanna go to a b-day party. You know the child isn't the one saying NO. Is my child not good enough for your child???? I mean come on??????!!!!! Thanks for letting me ramble on but I know how you feel. invis. +5
  • We all know that kids can be cold-hearted bastards!! (It's no wonder we have people up on the clock tower--"picking off" innocent civilians!!!) Anyone perceived as "different", is usually ostracized by the majority--at least until the "ostracizee" has something of value to offer. For future birthdays, it might be good to only invite TRUE (not fair-weather) friends. Good luck!
  • Whittle down the numbers to those you think might have a chance of being true friends and do something different with them.
  • Sometimes one good friend is better than many. Does your son have at least one good friend?
  • When you write the thank you notes, add, "my son is looking forward to sharing your son's/daughter's special day..." or something like that. If that doesn't make them invite your son, then maybe they aren't the people you want to associate with anyway. Hope it gets better, Ripple.
  • well are u sure other kids are having parties? maybe he is not invited b/c other kids arent having a party.
  • I think if i were in this situation id invite less kids, say 3 or 4, those which he is closest to, and take them for a day out to the Zoo or suchlike, if theres less kids its a little more 'private and he would be more likely to get a 'return invite.
  • I think that being the bigger person may be hard for your son to understand right now, but that it's a valuable lesson that will reap benefits for the rest of his life. The reciprocating invites of the birthday parties of his friends right now, only reap short-term gifts and most likely, superficial friends. I usually try to live by the philosophy of treating others how i would want to be treated. That doesn't mean that i haven't been stepped on or disrespected, but it certainly shows the true friends and actions at the end of the day.
  • I'm so sorry this happened! I would invite him to my son's birthday party!
  • Send cupcakes to his schoolroom for the kids to celebrate his birthday and stop wasting money for a party for the little ingrates. Make his birthday special for a dinner night out at a grown up restaurant with you.

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