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It sounds like you have a chip on your shoulder. The question can be aimed at men just as much as at women.
I love and enjoy sex with my wife. We no longer go like bunny-rabbits, but we enjoy a deeper love and a more evenly paced sexual relationship. Sex doesn't need to stop because you're married with children. You just need to understand that there are other pressures on your time and adjust your expectations accordingly.
As an example, I assume that Angie21, a new beginner here, is still very young and with a young love, because she has been worried about her boyfriend not being able to stay the distance and it has never happened before. It will happen many times in the future, if they are still together, and she will come to understand that it shows his feelings for her and not just his physical wants and needs. What starts off as as 5 times a day, every day, doesn't carry on that way, or there would be no money coming in.
Perhaps you need to spend a bit of time with your partner and relax her - maybe with a massage, some nice music, and a little wine - and forget about your longing for sex. Let her have some time with you without feeling that you are going to get angry and demand sex. If that is how she associates you and sex then she will never really want it. Make it something special that she can cherish and she will want to have those feelings more often.
I think women have just as high sex drive as men. I think sometimes in a long realtionship the things that women get turned on by happen less often.. the spontanious, romatic, fun, sensual things that often occur in the begining of a relationship.. I think men have to take some responsibility for this .. you need to provide some of the same incentives as you once did. Women cant just "turn them selves on" because now its sex time.You accually actively have to turn her on mentally and physically.
Becoming angry does not seem like the best way of turning someone on, that seems rather unhealthy to me.
My wife definitely used sex to get what she wanted. She wanted to be married, have a house and have kids. Basically, sex has stoped since she got what she wanted. You can't blame stress or her being over-worked. She doesn't cook, clean, do laundry, help the kids with homework and she doesn't have a job. She just used me.
i don't know for sure, but i think that different things turn her on that turn me on
It depends on the woman's testosterone levels. If she has high testosterone levels, then she has the need to "get off" even if it is by herself. Now there is also the woman that just enjoys romance with her man whether she gets off or not....it is still wonderful to her. 10 years of marriage and it just gets better. But this is a woman that is true to herself and her sexuality and never compromises by just doing it to keep the man! He knows she wants him!
This is true. The whole identity of humans is procreation. Men try to multiply with as many women as possible, while women try to raise their young. Once the basic instinct of women is satisfied they tend to not need sex as much, its the evolution of man kind causing women to still want more sex and men are also settling down and staying at home for the same reason. Back in the day cavewoman would usually only have sex until pregnant then raise the child until pregnant again, while men would impregnate the female then move on to the next and so on.
A woman's sex drive is equal to, and in some cases far exceeds, that of a man.
That being said, women are different in their approach to sex. Women have to be in the mood; men have to be in the room.
There are sex manipulators on BOTH sides, which is unfortunate, but sex is enjoyable, and should not be used as a weapon.
Old question, but whatever... I'm bored!
There is some truth to saying women use sex to "capture" a man. I have watched many female friends resort to sex as a way of reeling a man in and securing a relationship - despite the failure rate. The reason this doesn't continue is akin to a child's claim that "this is the last thing I'll ever ask for" - for most women, sex isn't the objective, the relationship is; and she now has it.
Take notice: every relationship has more sex in the first 3 sexual months than probably at any point there after. As others have said, you now must exert yourself to acquire what was once effortlessly presented to you. :)
I have been married for many years and my sex drive hasn't changed since I first met Hubby. Our lovelife has only gotten better, although our frequency has decreased to on average 2 times per day.
That is not the case in my house - My wifes sex drive is very high, I can't keep up with her.
I wouldn't have sex, if I didn't enjoy it.
I walk around with an amazing sex drive just about 24/7, & I'm definately not seeking any of that... I'm a lesbian.
But, I know what you're talking about, and I think it's more of a psychological breaking point than "they were just lying and manipulating all along".
For example: When you're single, you sleep alone most nights. You may have your friends to hang out with, but there's no one for you to go home to... at least, no one you can kiss and hug and cuddle and fuck.
It's in our instincts to breed, so when you're having a "sex drought", your brain is going to release more sexual hormones when you encounter a possible mate.
So you're at the club and here's this hot bitch grinding & teasing her body against yours, whisering naughty things in your ear as she slips you her phone number.
Now let's skip to marriage. It starts off great; you're (freshly) in love, starting a new life together, really getting to know eachother on a whole new level. It's the "puppy love" stage... you're head over heels for eachother.
Then, about a year into it, the novelty wears off. Sex between the two of you becomes predictable... and, we ARE humans, so of course, anything that we HAVE becomes less and less desireable the longer we have it.
Now lets skip to the damn children.
Before then you could at least both go to work and do your own things, have some time apart... then in the afternoon you both come home to eachother, fresh from a friday at work or an evening with friends.
Now one of you works your ass off all day every day, taking as much overtime as you can to make up for the slack and making yourself miserable with the weight of your family's survival on your shoulders. The other one gets to clean up poo and try to figure out what THIS type of high-pitched shreiking means all day long, while simultaneously washing all the clothes, doing all the dishes, cooking for the spouse who will be home in an hour, etc.
I think it's just a matter of stress level & increasing boredom.
Anyone who says a woman's sex drive is equal to a man is a liar. If that was true, there would be no need for men to seek prostitutes for one, among many other reasons.
Ladies your first time knotted, did the dog force you? Many have been. Did you go back for more after/
by oldminer on February 10th, 2012
| 1 person likes this
Name something sexual that you could not live without.
by nas88car on February 10th, 2012
| 1 person likes this
How quick can you make yourself cum?
by nas88car on February 10th, 2012
| 1 person likes this
What Would It Take To Get You To Do Me in The Booty ?
by BigBrownBiooty on February 10th, 2012
| 1 person likes this
Women. Are you planning on wearing or buying a sexy outfit for valentines day?
by nas88car on February 10th, 2012
| 1 person likes this
You're reading I've always wondered about this: How much do women walk around with a sex drive? It often seems to me that they want sex to capture a man, have children, or get affection, but once that's accomplished, many seem to care less unless their man becomes angry
Comments
Man you seem like a good man ! your wife is lucky !
by cami1211 on December 7th, 2006
Thank you, cami. I assure you I am not the best husband out there, but I DO love my wife and try to understand her needs. I even did a course in Indian Head Massage so I could help relax her after a hard week at work. I was the only man, and all the women wanted to use me (as a model, lol)! If I don't try to understand my wife how can I expect her to try to understand me and my needs and wishes? Rest assured, though, that we have arguments (adult discussions) and our share of problems like any other couple. We just try to work through things together and never go to sleep angry - it was the best piece of advice my mother ever gave me.
by Ullyses on December 7th, 2006
hey .. thats what my mother said too!
by cami1211 on December 7th, 2006
smart mothers
by cami1211 on December 7th, 2006
Wow Ullyses bravo!! You're such a great catch, I hope your wife realizes that :)
by altgirl84 on August 3rd, 2008