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  • I always considered sex and romance to be two separate things. Sex can be carried out in a romantic way, but its not romantic on its own. Thats how I feel at least. Everyones experience varies, I didnt feel attached the first time either (it wasnt a boyfriend though, just a male friend). The first time for me felt very normal, casual, routine. If you are a little older, it may be because you know more about it although you hadnt done it before- it takes a lot of the mystery and magic out of it. It is a very simple thing in all actuality, but I wouldnt worry if I were you. A lot of your friends may make it out to be a bigger deal than they actually felt; it still amazes me how people still put so much emphasis on a small thing. In any case, good luck and I hope it was enjoyable.
  • Having sex can increase intimacy between two people, but losing one's virginity is not a guarantee of it. What you're talking about with attachment has much to do with intimacy and the gratification you felt in the act itself - if your needs were taken care of, if you felt as though it was mutually loving, if you felt bonded then you would likely feel attachment. If your needs aren't being met, communicate them - this is something they don't teach in sex-ed that should be near the top of the list. Communication in sexual relationships is as important as it is in every other kind of relationship.
  • I didn't feel more attached to the guy I lost my virginity to after doing it. It's not bad, actually, it's good for you. Getting all emotional and hung-up on ANYBODY is a bad idea, especially a man. Women MUST BE independant.

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