Do you think waiting to be financially stable is a good reason to wait to get married? or do you think its just another excuse? if 2 people love each other why not get married right away? if they already have been together for at least a yr?
by 
Bettyboop
ANSWERS: 19
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Welcome to my world honey. I have beenn with my man for 4 and a half years, he says he doesnt want to get married until we are more financially stable. But a whole life is like we are married, we live together, own a car together, joint bank accounts... Theres bugger all that needs to change. But still i wait...
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It might help to have at least a financial plan thought out, where will that couple live, if the two of them will be working, etc. Some people like to wing it, but when it comes to monetary issues and marriage that's not always the best path to take.
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Hard call. If one partner's finances are totally jacked up it would offer an opportunity to show thier dedication to the relationship by clearing up the mess prior to asking the other's commitment.
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Yes it would be easier to have money behind you before getting married but if you are together and that is where you want to go then I say do it. If everybody decided to wait to get married or have children because they didn't have the money then there would be a heck of a lot less marriages and kids in the world today. You don't have to splash out on a lavish wedding with money you don't have. Some of the nicest marriages I have witnessed have been small and intimate ceremonies :)
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The right time will come as it may. We waited ten years, bought a house, had a baby...getting married in August now that we're positive we like each other. I am glad we waited, but if I could go back I would've gotten married right away. That's only because I know it worked out and you can't predict that-it's a chance you have to be willing to take. Maybe just be glad your s/o takes it seriously enough to want to wait. That is a good sign.
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If they are already together why do they need a piece of paper to say so?
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If you want to have a nice wedding with your close friends and family there it's good to wait til you're financially stable. Plus if you've only been together for a year i think the waiting will do you both good...
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Get a financial planner and see what they say if you don't have one already. Because you should have one anyway.
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Hubby and I got married on less than two thousand dollars. That included the rings, the clothes, everything. We both had money so that wasn't an issue. You can have a nice wedding for not that much money. We didn't wear the fancy clothes or get married in a big fancy church, but we were just as married as these couples who are still paying for the wedding after the divorce. We got married in a park and it was still a very nice wedding even without all the fancy frills of formal weddings. Therefore I happen to be of the belief that if you're in love, go for it. Granted, if you don't have money you can opt for a simple wedding as opposed to a big fancy one and then when you get "financially stable" (if there is such a condition), you can renew vows in a fancy church ceremony.
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It actually might make sense to get married. You can eliminate or reduce duplicate expenses. But, THAT is not a reason to get married.
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"Financially stable" could mean a lot of things, depending on who you talk to. If the situation is two kids right out of school who have been sweethearts for forever that want to be married, but they both still live with their parents... YES, wait until you're more financially stable. Get a little money saved up... get at least ONE car that's paid off, start looking at renting/leasing apartments, buying furniture, and learn how to manage bills... Diving into all of that head first would be horrendously stressful.
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I really don't see how it could be an issue with marriage unless one has reservations about the financial responsibility of the other. Really, I think "waiting to be financially stable" is much better used as a reason to hold off on having kids.
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It is possbile that the person that wants to wait is making an excuse. It is also possible that they want to become financially independent. There are no guaruntees in life. People get divorced, become disabled, pass away. There is no guaruntee that the person you marry will always be able or willing to contribute to the financial coffers. Only you can decide if you are or are not willing to wait. Are you willing to lose the person you love because you are unwilling to wait to get married. If you think s/he is playing games with you then you very well may be willing to take that chance. But no one can decide for you.
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he is just trying to keep the back door open in case he has to run or wants to run. he might be afraid of committment. it is a good reason if you are both saving your money and working five days a week , each of yah. it s just an excuse if you arent saving money for a down payment on a home or first and last for an apartment.
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It could take someone years to be financially stable. That should not be the reason, however, if it's the case of just saving money to have enough to have a nice wedding and honeymoon... then there is no needing in rushing to get married right away. Those are pre-marital special moments you can still share and grow together while you are in the process of saving up so it won't put a dent in your current funds. If you've been together a year, it's okay.. It's not like you've invested 5 years into the relationship and you are still waiting to marry. Take your time and it will turn out better that way.
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More financial stability is a good reason to wait to have kids. If you want a huge wedding that you can't currently afford, that's a reason. "Waiting for financial stability" is not, IMHO. But I mean if you love each other, what's the rush to get married? If you feel like you HAVE to marry this person to prove your love or to keep them around, maybe you should examine your relationship a bit more closely. If you're eventually gonna get married anyway, you shouldn't have to worry about hurrying it up :)
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If you are both not financially stable on your own, Don't get married. Two heads is not always better than one. I would recommend going to a Dave Ramsey seminar, learn how to manage money together. Be debt free except the house and school, before the wedding.
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In this economy? The word for someone who waits to be financially stable before marrying is: BACHELOR
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Financial status is transitory. It changes for the better or the worse and whether or not you're married has nothing to do with that. If you want to be married, get married. Economics is just an excuse. Just don't commit to lifestyle choices (housing, cars, etc.) beyond your means.
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