Serious question. For those of you who've had a parent you were close to pass away, but you had time to realize that it was probably gonna happen sooner than later, before it actually happened... how'd you cope with it before, and after?
by 
Tex
ANSWERS: 4
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With my dad, he had a chronic lung disease, so I knew he was sick long before he passed away. I can't say I wasn't upset when he died, but all my life I'd known my dad was sick, so I had just come to terms with it, really. Afterwards, I was kicking myself for not spending more time with him before he died. But, also, I knew that he wasn't suffering anymore, so that helped ease the pain somewhat. That's what does comfort you, especially if you've seen that person suffer for a long time -- just knowing that they won't have to struggle any more.
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It wasn't one of my parents, but my grandfather, and it was a long time ago. We knew he was going to die, but that didn't seem to make it any easier. I didn't really have anyone to help me through it, but I made it. It is astonishing the amount of hurt you can go through when a loved one dies. Let others help you through it, and be strong. It will get easier. I am sincerely sorry for your loss. I hope you have many other loved ones around (and friends, I'm your friend too). Good Luck!!!!!!!!!
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It was my grandfather but he raised me, so I consider him my father. He had Alzheimer's and for almost three years I watched him deteriorate. Unfortunately I didn't handle it very well after I found out what was happening. I tried to ignore it thinking that if I didn't believe what was going on then the problem would just go away (I was only 13). I kept believing that up until the day after he passed. I did the same thing afterwards (ignoring it and pretending nothing happened) until about a month ago it hit me & i just cried for days. Just by the way you worded your question I can tell you're going to do better with coping with it than I did because you're not quite in denial. The hardest part is to watch them suffer. Good luck and stay strong.
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June 30th is the 4 year anniversary of my father's passing. I knew 6 weeks before he died that it was inevitable, but still it wasn't any easier for me, when it actually happened. I kept myself busy with arrangements, and doing as much as I could to make him comfortable. Before he died, my Grandparents came for a visit, and I had to entertain them, as well as care for my Dad, work, and take care of my 3 children. I had plenty to keep me busy. Then once he passed, I just went kind of numb. The reality of it didn't hit me, I didn't really have anyone that I could talk to, my sister was in denial about what she was feeling, and I'm still not sure she's sorted all her feelings out about it.. I was told to just put it out of my mind, by my husband...He thought he was helping, by telling me that. I didn't cope well once it did hit me. I had a bout of severe depression. I got some counseling and things are much better now, but with Father's day this weekend, and the anniversary of his death coming up, I know a lot of my feelings are going to be on the surface.
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