ANSWERS: 3
  • You are comfortable (like a child with a blankie) in this relationship, even though, you know it is bad, you will sugarcoat it, instead of really dealing with the issues. You had probably envisioned, you both being together, and living happily ever after, and you don't want to see that, the dream is not going to happen. For your sake, you need to let go completely, and try to have other relationships, you will never meet the right person, if you are stuck in a bad relationship.
  • It's most likely that you suffered insecure attachment to your mother as an infant/child - perhaps you were separated for some reason or she was maybe depressed/busy/absent? There are various reasons and it's not anyone's fault as such but we can be affected by our mothering/parenting and this can impact upon our adult relationships. It could be that the 'child' in you is the one who is holding on to the idea of this relationship. Recognize that the 'child' cannot make decisions based on nyour adult self and needs - she is simply desperate for reassurance. Make her feel safe with you and take control of your own happiness.
  • Codependency is horrible thing girl; i've been there and done that. Your best bet is to really cut off all communication.. I know, it's really hard.. but you HAVE to. You said you're not happy when you're with him right? But miserable without him; look at the effect it has had on your confidence, and personality really. A relationship is a partnership; for someone to be accencuating your life, not mentally and emotionally manipulating you. I know the lonliness factor is tough, but get out as fast as you possibly can. Things will only get worse.

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