I would tell him to go into therapy. Once he is in therapy for a year or so then I would consider couples counseling. One year is not going to cure him but it shows some commitment to getting better. Take it real slow. Those diagnoses if correct are very difficult to over come. Not impossible but very difficult. He has already shown you that his is capable of being abusive. Pls. don't let him draw you back in. You may also want to look into counseling to help deal with his abuse. Also don't listen to him about the suicide threat. He is simply trying to manipulate you. If and it is a small if he does kill himself unless you handed him the gun it is not your fault or responsiblity. You cannot save him. Doctors can't save him. He has to work with doctors to save himself. He has to do most of the work. Edit: I just want to make something clear. I think you should wipe your hands of him unless you have children with him. If you really and trully want to get back with him not because he is manipulating but because you want to make the relationship work then I would go with what I said above. But I wouldn't do it. Abusers especially severally mentally ill abusers rarely get better.

With sincere honesty, you need to take care of you....first! You need some counseling to help with your self esteem. You are being kept in mind bondage! He isn't your responsibilty!!!!!!! You aren't a sacrafice that has to be made for him to be happy, or to live! This won't get better, it will only get MUCH worse! He needs real help, from a real Doctor! I'm not heartless, but you can't help someone who doesn't want help! You can HELP...... you! Get some counseling, put your life back on track, and tell him he needs to do the same. If he threatens to kill himself, tell him you will not listen, you will call 911 for him.

It's very rare for a leopard to change its spots. I say, walk away and have a happy, peaceful life.

This type of person sometimes exhibits "Knight in Shining Armour" tendencies BEFORE this abusive side emerges, so sometimes you can be totally side swiped when this streak of anger emerges. They normally wait till you are deep into an emotional and physical relationship BEFORE running the risk of "whamming you" with this type of behavior. You have got to help yourself first. You need OUT of the relationship. It has escalated to a point where it is totally unhealthy... and sounds a bit psychotic. Get out of the relationship now... Pull back and get to some type of shelter where he can not find you. If you meet with him in the future-- do so ONLY in a public venue... do not let yourself be caught alone with the guy in the privacy of your home, car, etc... Do not go back to him unless he finishes... FINISHES a program on Anger Management, etc... Suicide threats are common with this... It is the ultimate "control freak drama switch". Get out of this-- and at least preserve yourself. Sometimes you can't save other people from themselves. He's on a self-destructive course. Get out of his way before he pulls you down with him.

It is up to him to take care of him. And it is up to you to protect you from him. Don't try to help him again, as I am certain that you have spent your entire relationship trying to help him already. It won't be anymore effective if you try again. In fact, you two have a pattern set up and it would be less effective than before. Walk - or run - away. If he is going to crash, he will do it with, or without you around. Just don't be near him when he does or he may take you with him.