I can't get the courage to go and ask the girl i like out for a drink. Do you think i have less chance if i ask her online or by text? I'm really nervous about asking her becus she's never on her own and i havn't had a relationship in so long. Any advice?
by 
Whizzell
ANSWERS: 11
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You know what? I get nervous asking ladies out for drinks too. It's especially difficult if there are other people around, but I don't think online or texting is the way to go if you can help it. There's no substitute for FTF interaction, but if there are always half a dozen hangers-on, I'm not sure what else you could do.
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You need more confidence in yourself to never hesitate to do what you want to do. If you want to listen to your conscience thats saying dont do it then dont and if you want to do it anyways then do it. Try and fail, but don't fail at trying.
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If this is someone you already know reasonably well in a social context I don't think it's such a bad thing to arrange to go for a drink by text, if it's actually spluttering out the question that worries you. It at least means you don't have to spend ages trying to get her alone. The oly thing you need to think about is whether you're going to feel confident actually being on the date. If it's just the asking that makes you nervous, I say it's fair game (I would happily go on a date with someone I'd already chatted too if they asked me out by text) - if the whole idea of talking to her makes you feel nervous and embarrassed, then you need to deal with that before you even ask her.
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It is extremely cold and impersonal to do such a thing by text or online. The person involved cannot see your body language nor hear your inflection. You will have greatly increased your chances of being turned down. Just be yourself, and realize it's hard for everyone. Practice on your own until you become more smooth at it. If she's never on her own, start the conversation with "Can I talk to you a second?" And if the hangers-on are still around, indicate that she should dismiss them temporarily with an eye glance, or clarify with "Alone?." Best of luck!
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From what I gather, if she is always with other people that means she is always out with other people. Just try to integrate into that group, maybe through somebody else she knows well. If she sees you are friends with the other peron and he/she thinks you are cool, it will pave the way to getting to know her better. In the group setting you could maybe sit beside her and strike up conversations with her, makes it way easier to than a one on one situation.
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Why don't you try to initiate a group outing? The next time she's around a group of her friends, ask all of them out. It takes the pressure off a bit for both of you, and you can probably arrange some time to chat with her there.
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i'd say ask her by text if you are so nervous about her friends.
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Carrier pigeon! No one ever uses carrier pigeons anymore. That would get her attention. =P Seriously, relax though. Be confident in yourself.
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Sure I see what the problem is. If you think you are a dirtball loser and aren't worthy of her attention you should definitely not ask her for a drink. On the other hand if you believe that you are a decent guy who can take care of her and be there for her then you are someone she would definitely be interested in. I don't think you are a dirtbag loser so in my opinion you are worth the bother. If she is with others then ask her aside for a moment, then ask her. You seriously need to step out of your shell. I recommend you take some sort of classes that willl improve on your confidence and communication skills.
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best thing to do is keep it casual. I think a casual text saying "hey, what are you at? fancy heading to the pub for a pint?" and see what she sends back. If you keep it casual then it doesnt look like a date and you can see what happens from there. xx
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