by totally_confused on April 12th, 2008

totally_confused

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A guy tells you he wants to sleep with you in one bed but not have sex. Can it be sincere or will he try to have sex and thats a way to get you in bed with him?

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  • by katespana on April 21st, 2008

    katespana

    It's hard not to have sex when you're so close and relaxed together. If you are attracted to each other the chemistry and natural biological urges will take precedence in the middle of the night. You'd be better advised to decide whether you want and are ready for a sexual commitment then at least you go into it with your eyes 'wide open' rather than half or fully asleep! And you can take the appropriate steps to protect yourself from pregnancy too, that way.

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  • by LJPearl on April 13th, 2008

    LJPearl

    If you do not want to have sex with the guy, then I would not sleep in the same bed.
    Regardless of your or his intent, temptation could take it to another level in no time.

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  • by th1s1sit on April 12th, 2008

    th1s1sit

    If I didn't want to have sex with this person, I would not share a bed with him. Sounds like it could cause all sorts of miscommunications.

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  • by failed_stoic on November 21st, 2009

    failed_stoic

    It could be sincere. How much confidence do you have in your ability to tell him to back off in the event he takes it further than you're comfortable with? How likely is it that he is really trying to seduce you? Maybe you'd like cuddling. You're in the best position to analyze the situation's pros and cons.
    ...
    Boy, I just realized how late I've answerd this question. It looked like an interesting question, but it was asked quite some time ago.

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  • by bbgunngirl on September 13th, 2009

    bbgunngirl

    well just ask him make him promise he wont try anything and if he wont just dont sleep in the same bed as him.

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  • by Anonymous on November 22nd, 2009

    Anonymous

    Of course he can be sincere.
    +5

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  • by Snowman on July 22nd, 2011

    Snowman

    In my experience it has been the other way around. A couple times a girl has come home with me and then got timid and changed her mind. Once it happened when we were already in bed. I just rolled over and went to sleep. I'm not going to argue with a woman who changes her mind after she has already climbed into bed with me, but I don't bother calling her after that. It's the pinnacle of flakiness. It's best to avoid sex with flaky women. You don't know what they might say later.

    About sleeping with a guy: it depends on how well you know him. You don't want to climb into bed with a stranger you picked up hitchhiking, especially if you see fresh blood stains on his clothes and a crazed look in his eyes. I wouldn't trust Charles Manson, for one.

    Even somebody you know, like a friend of a friend, could suddenly become demanding and forceful. How will you explain it later, to the police, or a judge, or your mother? "Well, your honor, I let him sleep with me b/c he promised he just wanted to sleep. But suddenly he changed his mind and he grabbed me and- and- I was so confused!"

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