Whats the best way to handle a five year old girl who says no when you tell her to go to her room cause shes been sassy or didnt mind. she usually says no and then begs and begs. i say i'm gonna take away something, but would like a different aproach
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Anonymous
ANSWERS: 6
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When my daughter was young she did the same thing. I picked her up and carried her to her room (very calmly, not being angry or using force) and then stayed on the other side of the door in the hall, holding the door knob because she was screaming & pulling on it trying to get out. Just a typical temper tantrum that she got overly dramatic about. Girls! I told her she had to stay in her room, QUIETLY, for a designated amt of time (I think it was about 5 minutes) without touching the door or carrying on. Every time she started throwing a fit again, I started the time-out over again. The time-out didn't "start" until she was quiet and calm. She hated it. It worked. The next time I told her to go to her room, she did because she knew I meant business. I don't believe in spanking or humiliating kids by yelling at them, and my calm attitude just helped her to quiet down herself. Sorry this got so long!
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Actually, you've got the right approach -- you just need to learn to stick to your guns so the child knows you mean business. No more letting her wheedle you into giving a lighter sentence -- children want and need that kind of reliability and stability in their lives, so lay down the law.
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Pick her up and take her to her room. Be sure not to hurt her in carrying her almost-certainly struggling little body. I never close the door on my daughter, but if she leaves he room, her time out restarts. 4 minutes for a 4 year old. And if she comes out, she gets put back in. The first time she tried the screaming/crying/begging thing you're talking about, we spent about an hour putting her back in her room repeatedly. She didn't try it again. You should always do what you say. If you don't want to give that as a punishment, don't give it to begin with. But punishments aren't negotiable. My daughter knows that arguing only makes it worse. People tell me I'm too strict, but they also marvel at how well-behaved and friendly and happy my child is, and what a good relationship we have, never realizing that the two are connected. We have boundaries, consequences, and she knows exactly where we stand. It makes life better for both of us.
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Give her a slap on the butt.
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I had the same problem when my daughter was that age what I did was the time out you tell her once and if she keeps going then she gets a time out all it has to be is a chair in a room and she has to sit one minute for every year old she is try it and see how it works
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CHILDREN KNOW MORE PSYCHOLOGY THAN PARENTS...FOR SOME REASON WE LOSE THAT AS WE GROW OLDER, AND WE MUST PICK UP BOOKS TO BRUSH UP ON THAT INVALUABLE SKILL...CHILDREN KNOW WHEN AND HOW FAR TO GO. IT IS UP TO US AS PARENTS TO SET GUIDELINES FOR THEIR PROTECTION AND FOR THEIR WELL-BEING. WELL MANNERED CHILDREN ARE WELCOMED EVERYWHERE, DISRESPECTFUL AND DISOBEDIENT AND DISRUPTIVE CHILDREN ARE UNWELCOMED EVERYWHERE. IF WE TEACH THEM GOOD THINGS FROM AN EARLY AGE, THEY WILL GET A GREATER CHANCE AT LEARNING TO OPEN DOORS FOR THEMSELVES FOR THEIR SOON FUTURES TO COME. EVERYBODY WILL WANT TO BE THEIR FRIENDS...I ASKED GOD FOR GUIDANCE AND THE BIBLE WAS MY GUIDE AND IT HELPED US GREATLY.. MY SONS ARE VERY GOOD SONS AND..EDUCATED. THANKS TO GOD...BY THE WAY...GOD AND I DID IT TOGETHER BECAUSE MY EX TRADED US FOR ANOTHER FAMILY WHICH CAUSED HIM DEARLY...THAT GAVE ME NO JOY, BUT FOR THOSE PARENTS WHO FIND THEMSELVES THINKING THEY ARE ALONE, WE DON'T HAVE TO BE. GOD IS ALWAYS THERE. CORDIALLY, AC
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