ANSWERS: 15
  • As a Heterosexual male with no experience at all with lesbian relationships I would have to say that they are no different in many aspects than those of two heterosexuals. Try telling the girl straight out things are moving faster than you would like and if it isn't too much to ask you would like them to slow down just a little. It has always worked for me when a girl has tried to rush things. I'm sure gay or bi females with a preference for other females are no different.
  • Haven't you ever heard that joke, "What does a lesbian bring on a first date? A U-Haul!"? Well it's just a joke but as a lesbian I can totally laugh at it! Lesbians are stereotyped for having "U-Haul syndrome", which is a term for rushing into relationships too quickly and sometimes painfully ending with lesbian bed death after months of co-habitation. Some reasons why I think this happens: Lesbians love living with their partner, sometimes its cheaper to live together and/or one partner might be homeless, etc. Tips for avoiding U-Haul Syndrome: Don't rent a U-Haul and talk to your girl about taking it slow. Chances are that she wants to avoid the U-haul syndrome stereotype too.
  • I think part of the reason lesbians want to move soooo fast into a relationship is because it can be damned hard to FIND a partner. We each have in mind things we look for in a partner and when you factor in the percentage of lesbians in your given area.. AND meet your personal criteria.. AND meet your physical criteria.. AND you meet THEIRS.. well!! You can imagine why some do like to move things along pretty quickly. I actually had the same problem with my current partner. In the beginning, she was all gung-ho for moving our relationship along at warp speed but I put the brakes on right smart quick. I insisted we take it slow, get to know each other's likes and dislikes, spend a few weekends alone together just to see if we were really compatible. Im happy to say that one year after we began dating we took the plunge and moved in together. We have been happily co-habiting for 3 and 1/2 years.
  • As a general rule, women are more monogamous then men, and women are more eager to have a committed relationship then men. Men want to plant seeds, women want to feather nests. That's why the average length of gay men's relationships is shorter then the average heterosexual relationships, and the average length of lesbian relationships is longer then the heterosexual average. That being said, statistics are one thing, individuals are another. You just need to be honest and direct from the beginning of the relationship about what you want.
  • Make your intentions known from the beginning that you want to go slow, and outline what that means for you(kissing, hugging, hand holding, making out, etc). If she respects you and likes you then she will want to go slow, if not she will keep pushing you.
  • show more love.
  • Dig your heels in, stand your ground. Be clear from the start. When you find the right woman, she'll understand this.
  • My EX said I Luv U, in the first month of knowing each other. After making Love for the first time -she wanted me to have her children(3months), and proposed several times. TOOOOOOOOO MUCH!! I was very much attracted to her physicaly and intellectually-but I needed more time-WE needed more time-she just did not want to let the realtioship mature. When I mentioned to her that she needed to take it slow or slower at bare minimum-she was heartbroken and felt rejected. This was very difficult because I was begining to fall in Love--but her insistance put too much pressure on the realtionship--so I ended it.
  • Relationships seem to have kept up with the times. The convenience of computors, debit cards ETC., have sped up the process so I guess relationships must follow.
  • maybe don't meet your true love. know a place http://Findbilover.com has some nice bi,gay,lesbian members.
  • I've never been able to figure that out. Lesbians almost have a moving van outside the door the morning after. So I'm sorry I don't know how to slow it down..maybe by saying you want it slow in the first place???
  • lol-i would like to say "introduce her to a woman" because men wonder why women want to take it so slow. ;-)
  • I think there is much more depth attached to this and the fact that WE have pretty much lived within our society's boundaries we too want 'family' so we are simply trying to find it at all cost, sometimes? I think all of us want to love and be loved yet, most human beings carry emotional baggage unlong the way hence; entering and exiting relationships quickly and without truly having 'inner' peace,love and happiness to anchor to and sustain them. It took me more than a few relationships to "get this". I find that most people look for PLH externally therefore, women embrace the 'U-haul mentality'? Although many years later I now find this mentality unfortunate and somewhat dysfunctional. Don't get me wrong I too had a couple of U-HAUL relationships many years ago but arn't our choices,actions and needs simply a reflection of our inner damaged selves? Filling voids and fears as quick as possible? I think relationships,drinking etc...simply distracts us from being with self at a deeper level? Obviously hetero/gays are alike in this circumstance as well. We all want instant gratification hence; our need to move quickly but i think there is much more romance,depth and true love on a much slower path? I hope so anyway. :)
  • Hi I am a girl (lesbian) i love girls and i always take things slow. why dnt u just give me your msn (if u dont have one make one ;) ) and we could chat a little bit :) p.s : sorry i did nt answer ur question Love marinaxPXP
  • I have had the same experience... in addition I find those who are in a hurry to move things along do also suddenly pull away sooner or later at some level. When everything moves so fast is there time for intimacy to really develop? Without true intimacy how long does it take before passions fizzle out and nothing is left? Iintimacy is what will keep a relationship together, I believe. It is the difference between a home cooked meal and fast food, you cant live on fast food for too long. What to do? I believe talk about this from the get go, bring the awareness that you go slow when you find the right person and stick to your gun.

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