If you were a married woman, would you be upset if you found out that your husband was going onto the internet to chat with another women for an hour everyday?
by 
mizuiislife
ANSWERS: 37
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No. I'd just tell him I hoped he enjoyed that cybersex real good cos he won't be getting any for a while. Hehe.
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i agree...... but if the cookings no good at home he should eat out!
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i agree...... but if the cookings no good at home he should eat out!
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Yes.
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yes, for me thats as bad a cheating, it emotional cheating, all the things he was talking to her about, should be for his wife.
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I'd be upset because it would be like cheating to me. It is forming an intimate, private relationship with someone other than his spouse. That's cheating. If he's doing something he wouldn't share openly with me, it's cheating. If he wouldn't do it in front of me without guilt, it's cheating. Emotional cheating is just as much cheating as physical.
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I would not be upset if my husband went online and chatted up another female, he is free to do this, if however he wanted to take the relationship to another level I would want him to tell me and then we could reassess our relationship. I would not want him to be in a relationship with me if he had feelings for someone else. I have told him that repeatedly and he understands this and I would hold him in the same regard.
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Spending an hour, daily, in conversation with anyone is a big investment in a relationship. As a therapist I have worked with several couples who have either divorced or came close to it over this issue. Often the wandering spouse says it began as a superficial contact but it developed further, sometimes to the point of making contact in real life. On the other side of the coin, I have talked to single people who have connected with partners this way. In one of those cases, however, the single was devastated to discover their "soul mate" was not only married but had misrepresented himself in some other, serious ways.
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um, it depends if he would let me look at the conversations, and they were just small talk because he was bored, then no But if it was the same woman, same time of day, and he would act suspicious about what they were saying.. and he always made sure he didnt talk when i was there then yes. so it would depend :D
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Yeah, because if he's doing it for the reasons I think he is, it's cheating.
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I am a married woman and my Partner of 27 years drives OTR semi. She's often on the cellphone with our friends and her own friends (some of which, I have to admit I've never met). I've learned in the 12 years she's been trucking that trust is a thing you need to give to get back and before you say "it's different for a man", just think that she's out on the road five days of the week and only home on weekends. I have to trust her (and I do, implicetly) to uphold her honour and mine. Some men will and some men won't be honorable. Some men are Dogs and so are some women. We know which ones are and which aren't; but for me, if my Best Beloved was chatting with someone on the computer, fine and dandy. I spend enough time on here on AB and Y!A. she has the right to have her own cyberfriends.
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Upset is not the word I would use, I think more like I'd be a woman with a weapon, lol
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Yes.
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Yes.
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I would be irked he was not open with me on that. But more importantly I would want to know what it was about.
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All of us are doing it so I would have to say probably not.
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It depends on what its about. Also, if it only lasted a few days. I dont see any problem with that. In fact it would be less painful than watching the divorced man her divorced sister is dating kiss your wife on the lips when leaving your house if you are a man.Also, you start to see why they are divorced.
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I would be curious. Especially in a marriage. It wouldn't hurt to check on it, it will do one of two things A) solidify your trust, or B) give you a reason to ask him about it. As I said, it's marriage, not a fling. It's a serious thing.
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I am a married woman, and I would just want to know who she was and what they were talking about. I have friends (some of whom are male) I talk to on the internet sometimes hours at a time, but it's better than running up a phone bill, and it's not relationship-damaging in any way. In fact, it's probably good for us, since somehow my friends always seem to side with me being kind to my husband and loving him and things.
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Not in the least, as long as my husband was open and honest about it. He does talk with women online, most of them very harmless, one or two a little flirty, and he tells me flat out. I don't consider flirting cheating, especially since he tells me about it every time it happens and even lets me read his logs if I want to (which I really don't care to anymore). These Women live far away and he will never get together with them, so I consider the whole thing harmless. It's secrecy that is a warning sign, not talking or even flirting, but not wanting you to know about it.
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Depends what they are talking about. But that's not the real issue. You need to find out why he's not talking to you. Communication and working to make sure you do it is the key to a good marriage.
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no, i would encourage it. he needs all the psychiatric help he can get
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Yes. It happened to me and I put my foot down. I sent the woman an IM and told her I was his wife and told her not to contact him any more. I then told him if he had an issue with that then he could take his crap and find his cyberfriend and I'd wash my hands of him and our relationship! I don't know WHAT he was thinking but he stopped and "grew up". This happened 10 years ago. Somehow I don't think I'd react the same way if it were to happen again. I think now I'd just say, "whatever"! ha ha ha!! But at the time I said "cut it out" and honestly, I'd probably say it again only this time I'd probably say it while making new plans for my life that didn't include him. Screw me once, shame on you, screw me twice, shame on me!
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i was in this situation with my hubbie its emotional cheating and its painful as hell trying to do the right thing and work it out but honestly i gotta say i cant trust him worth a hill of beans around a comp....i get super paranoid i think maybe with time it might get better ... whatever he says doesnt matter its up to you and youre feelings to see if you want to forgive him
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Yes I would, Cyber contact is dangerous territory. It starts of with chatting and ends with with virtual sex. My husband "Cheats" like this all the time and I cannot figure out how to leave him because I love him!
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You know what, a little variety is good. I dont know why we women, or for that matter even men, make such a big deal about fidelity. There is lot more to marriage than sex. But if u still feel insecure about your spouse cheating on you, than probably you should beat him to it. Cheat on him before he cheats on you. Btw, wonder why its called cheating. PS. I am a married woman.
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Every now and then its not a big thing. If he were making sure to log on every day, and neglecting things in his life to do so, then I would be upset.
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I would. but thats because my brother lost his wife that way and shortly afterwards, "took is own life" over it...(I would, but thats me and I have my reasons)
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if it was being kept a secret from me, yes.
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I've chatted for almost 4 years, I had one male close chat mate, that I realized that it went something intimate. I love my husband so much, especially my children. So I completely STOP chatting with him. One time, I taught my husband how to chat, and found out that he has now one female friend he always chats everytime he opens the messenger. I sensed something is not going right. I told him that it's fine to chat, for purposes of having friends, but the way I saw it, he has only one friend he constantly talks to. I reminded him, to beware, that friendship would turn intimate and I don't want to lose that trust I have in him for 14 years. In short, I just got jealous. This is my first time I felt this way.
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I would be very upset if I found out my husband was in an intimate relationship, even over the internet and without cybersex, with another women to the point he was talking ot her for an hour a day. This is time and energy that's being taken away from fostering a health and strong relationship with me, his wife. I wouldn't stand for it one bit.
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If he is talking exclusively to one woman, I would be concerned. But I talk to men online every day and it doesn't mean I am sexually nvolved, or even sexually attracted to them.
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I would question why he needs to do that? Why is he spending so much time on the Internet? It sounds like a husband who does not have enough to do with his time. Can he not find a good hobby? Is there no common interest with his wife, e.g. playing tennis, squash etc? If a man has time to spend on the internet talking to another woman, it's probably because he's bored and needs to get something decent to do. I would certainly encourage him to get off his bum and get a hobby or do all the jobs he needs to and has been neglecting around the house. There is certainly no excuse for chatting to other women and being married should give him a sense of responsibility to keeping his own marriage alive. This man needs to look at his marriage vows again and stop getting involved with other women, even just for talking, because he is certainly not adding value to his own marriage.
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Yes,my husband was on the compute haveing online affairs and i found out about it I was crushed....
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i would be ok with that. he could go online an hr every day
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Definitely
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yes i would be upset i would look at the chat logs and see whats going on before you do anything
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