Why is it that sometimes I want to choke the very life out of my husband, and sometimes I love him to death and can't live with out him. Do all married people feel that way or is it just me?
by 
littlecreeka
ANSWERS: 33
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I've heard that Ruth Graham, Billy Graham's wife, was once asked if she had ever considered a divorce. To which she replied, "Oh, no! Murder, maybe, but divorce, no." You sound pretty normal to my ear. Which is not to say that your relationship can't be strengthened and improved so that the choking desires diminish and the affection and romance grow. That can be a delightful lifelong project for any couple.
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Yes. People that tend to feel a lot of passion towards each other, certainly tend to get these feelings from time to time. I would consider both of you quite lucky, because it is better to have passion, than be bored with one another.
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it sounds to me like excessive dependency is at play.
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I am married and I feel that way sometimes. I am not bored and I do keep busy with the house, kids, and a part time job. It is just human nature. Women have a lot of domestic responsibilities and I think we are just jealous about how calm and flippant men react to certain things while women stress and over think over daily problems. I believe this is normal.
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I have never felt that way. I always think of my husband and I as being on the same team and if one of us fails or wins at something, I experience that as well. So we don't argue since that means the tam would be fighting itself, disagreements are easily sorted out because we always place the other person first. We respect each other deeply and it gets us through just about anything.
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LOL. As I told my hubby the other day. "I sometimes really dislike you but I always love you" Even though we love our spouses, etc. we do not always like the things they do and this should not be confused with our love for them.
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Yep pretty normal. If we agreed on everything than you married yourself. My husband can drive me insane some days but I admire the fact that he isn't scared to speak his mind or indifferent, as to let me have my way to just keep the peace. If it wasn't for conflicts, we would be in the dark about each other and our relationship wouldn't move forward. Doesn't mean you want to hug after every conflict but I wouldn't change a thing. (ok one thing. I would like it if he shopped less)
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Normal. My wife and I joke about it sometimes. Don't keep that annoyance bottled up. My wife has teased me about poisoning my dinner. I tease her about smothering her with a pillow. Sounds awful but it's funny and we laugh it off, which is a kind of release of stress. Just tell him, "Next time you leave the toilet seat up, I'm going to cut the brake lines of your car." Well, if he has a sense of humor. My wife and I share the same quasi-morbid sense of humor so it works for us. However, and I stress this part, we NEVER EVER put each other down -- even jokingly-- in public. That's our big rule about joking with each other.
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Sounds normal. Just don't get too close to the actual murder.
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No, it's just you, you are a bad evil sorry excuse for a wife, LOL. Nah, its all of us. LOL.
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It sounds like you need some help. People are making light of it but some married people HAVE snapped and acted on those feelings.
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After 23 years of being married I am surprised I am not in jail for murder. :P Perfectly normal in my book hurtzsogood
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No its not natural. You need help learning how to cope with your anger.
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Sounds like "marriage" to ME! LOL
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Male and female - both of us feel that way. It's marriage.
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I hope most most married people don't want to murder their spouses. Sounds like therapy might be in order if that's really the case.
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Not married yet, and I am not by far the most wise here, but this is how I feel about my bf thanks for asking this question!
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Very normal. Many of us feel that way from time to time. It's called frustration. If you didn't care about him, you wouldn't get so upset with him. I know a husband and wife that rarely talk to each other. No passion left in their marriage.
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my wife says i do the same to her
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Yep. That sounds very normal. You must have been married to him for more than 5 years.
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Sounds like mental illness. Tell your doctor you want to kill your husband. He will give you a referral to a shrink. Do it with the quickness.
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I think we all feel that way sometimes.
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It's fine as long as you don't actually choke him to death.
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You are okay. it gets better with longevity, at least thats what i have been told. All couples have differences. the best part is the makeup and you know what i mean. You can fuss you can fight just as long as the love is still there.
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Familiarity breeds contempt and absence makes the heart grow fonder. It's important for married people to respect each other's space.
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I can't say that I've ever been that angry at my husband. It isn't that I couldn't find little things to blow up to that level of anger, but I choose not to. When he does something that isn't up to my level of perfection, I remind myself that I'm rarely up to that level of perfection either and let it go.
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Very normal. My mother always said, "The one you love the most is the one you hate the most." This is true because the more we love someone, the more power they have to hurt or aggravate us. Whatever we feel towards them will always be intense, whether it's love or hate.
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oh come on,we know that you are talking about the gray part of the month. when you get up you have one nerve left and that ole man of yours gets on it. and then about a week or so later you can't live with out him. i good husband knows about this and stays the hell out of your way,usually by the time most men figure this out you are in the change and you just throw his dumb ass out. Really,just talk about it with him,if he is smart he will hear your words and change(LOL thats a real knee slapper,Huh?)but most don't and then they sit down at the local bar and say,I don't know what the hell got into that woman,all i said was"you putting on a little weight,Honey. yes all married people go through this,for some it's a tuff row to hoe.
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Normal
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Very normal. And trust me... He feels the same way! LOL
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Check with your doctor. You may be bipolar.
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It's just you, so calm down. You don't want to choke your husband to death. In the past, domestic violence incidents in which the victim was choked rarely warranted more than a misdemeanor charge. Not anymore, strangulation is attempted murder.
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Linda Joy Also (God forbid) he ever does get murdered you are on record for threatening his life. And the spouse is the first (and sometimes only) suspect. So even if you feel it don't say it or post it online!! -
Jenny The Great ⭐ The questioner by the name of 'littlecreeka' is on record. It is not a good idea to joke about killing someone.
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Normal, that's what happens when two people spend so much time together, when that happens get some distance. When one partner feels indifference is usually when it's over.
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