If your spouse or S/O comes off at you in a challenging or confrontational way when you ask them a question you want clarification on (so you can better understand intent), do your feelings get hurt easily or do you just "blow it off" as just being them?
by 
Millenium - The Mysterious M
ANSWERS: 11
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That would hurt my feelings and my husband knows it. If he does that I let him know and tell him that I'm asking because I don't have enough information and need clarification. That has caused uneasiness at times in our lives. One of the things I learned in our relationship is that he thinks a few words should suffice and as a detailed person, I like more information. We're just different.
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It would hurt my feelings, but if I told him that I just wanted clarification and no offense, and he apologized, then I wouldn't be upset at all.
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My experience has been that my s/o doesn't like to be asked questions...learned to blow it off. That's his issue not mine. (Have enough of my own...smile)
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First,let them know you recognise there is a problem, and ask if there is a way you can help. Then if they are confrontational, speak up firm, but not angry, and let them know you would like to help if you can, and relay what you expect of them in this situation...ie kind words, and an apology.Be Strong !
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Challenging I don't mind, it's a good way to learn. It would mean to me there is something I had not considered.........possibly. As an adult, confrontation is not necessary. My feelings don't get hurt easily about most things........but it can happen if it's taken to a personal level.
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I try to avoid confrontation like that but sometimes we just get snappy, not trying to take it out on the other person. My feelings don't get hurt and I do blow it off but only as she's having a hectic time right now.
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Well, I'm not very good. If that happens I get angry aaaaargh! Ofcourse I know it's them, but aaaargh!
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I use to "blow it off." Lately, I have used the power of communication. I told him how I really feel (upset, hurt) and he did not even realize he was acting this way. I have learned that it is important to talk with your S/O about these types of issues- You learn more about them and yourself in the process, which makes a stronger, happier relationship.
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i would just drop it, blow it off, but I would also REALIZE there is something or some reason for their being 'so defensive'....and yes, my feelings are hurt because I do not do that to them....
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I'd immediately go silent. Not speak a word to him for at least four hours, and then after that time, bring up the question again, in a very gentle, "kid gloves" way. In the mean time, my brain's wheels would spin at the analyzable data...Why did that question make him upset? How can we have thorough communication about this subject without feelings being hurt, etc. +5
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I'd let him know immediately that I don't appreciate the attitude, and that if we're in a true partnership I shouldn't feel intimidated for asking a question. Then I'd ask, "Now, Honey, can we try discussing this again?"
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