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by x3foreverlovedxx on March 13th, 2007

x3foreverlovedxx

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Help answer this question below.

Im 13 and ive been thinking that i have depression i dont eat and i cut myself 4 times. 1 time on the wrist and 3 times on my ankle. my mom found out today and shes mad and thinks i need help. i dont think that i need help... what should i do?

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Answers. 19 helpful answers below.

  • by anonymous on March 13th, 2007

    anonymous

    Hello. Right, first of all, I am a cutter. Haven't cut in a little while, though I am prone to the odd relapse. I have also been forced recently to realise I have a slight eating disorder. So I am going to tell you what I was like, someone who refused help.

    I've spent long hours sitting alone, in the dark crying, because I hurt so much. I became dependant on cutting to get me through a bad day because I couldn't function like a normal person without it. I literally tortured myself because I got so desperate. One day, I cut myself, and I couldn't feel it. I poured industrial drain cleaner in the wounds to feel the burn. It's no way to live. I starved myself for nearly three weeks to the point where I couldn't get out of bed because I enjoyed the burning feeling in my stomach.

    Anfd yet here I am, a lot better than I was talking to you. I did it first by acknowledging that 1) I had gone too far (and the first cut is too far) and 2) I had a problem, and I needed it sorted out. I did this myself by finding the route to my problem. For me it was blantantly obvious, but for others it is far harder. When you opress emotion for so long to the point where cutting is your only release, it is sometimes so easy to forget the root problem.

    Then I went cold turkey. It was nasty, but it had to be done. No weening myself off it, no gradual baby steps. Just stop. I kept my goal in mind (to be healthy once more) the root of it in mind, and it kept me going. It takes an awful lot of willpower and strength to do. I am actually amazed I did it.

    Thing is, I did it alone because that is the only way I can do things. I can't do therapists, I can't open up to them. It's not because I don't think I have a problem, it's just... I can't do it.

    Anyone who cuts has a problem. A serious problem. I would advise you did get help, just like your mum thinks. If you don't want it, then you have to make the decision, just like I did. Do you really want to go through it alone?

    Your mother isn;t mad. She is upset. Her baby is hurting and she can't make the pain go away. She probably seemed angry, but it was just her being upset. Please don't shut her out, she obviously cares.

    Please, whatever you do realise that this is wrong, the wrong way to deal with things. It only gets worse. I don't want it to go as far with you as it did with me. I have to live with it now.

    If you need any more help, just email me (see my profile) I am always willing to help, to talk, to do whatever I can.

    Let me know how you get on

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  • by Tranny on March 13th, 2007

    Tranny

    Not to be harsh, but if you're asking this question on AB it's apparent that you *do* need help.

    Cutting doesn't always mean a person has depression, either. Sometimes it's to lash out or even get attention.

    My advice is, read up about depression and it's symptoms. Ask a real doctor and do something good for yourself.

    As soon as you get help, the sooner you can go back to being the healthy, happy person you once were.

    I've been there too. In fact, I still am. But I'm getting so much better, and although I know this type of thing isn't cured easily, it's worth it. 100%.

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  • by melchizedek on March 13th, 2007

    melchizedek

    There is nothing wrong with getting help for depression. I've suffered from depression in the past. It's tough, and it's tough to let people know and ask for help. The fact that your mom knows is a good thing. She can help you. Medications do work and counseling can help you work through your problems. There's no reason for you to fight depression on your own. There is nothing wrong with asking for help.

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  • by mejinn on March 13th, 2007

    mejinn

    You're in denial, Mom is right. Therapy is nothing to be ashamed of, and it will also prevent things from becoming a lot worse. 13 is a tough age to be to begin with, don't make it any harder on yourself.

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  • by Ezzy on March 13th, 2007

    Ezzy

    I've been through the same thing....

    let someone help you

    Life is hard....But having someone to guide you along. Makes it worth living

    Your mom loves you...Trust her

    it may seem hopeless now...But give it a chance...You will never know unless you try

    god bless
    andy-b

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  • by Brian I on March 13th, 2007

    Brian I

    If you damage yourself you must know you that you need help. Let your mom help you... please.

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  • by R U Sirius on March 13th, 2007

    R U Sirius

    Lets see,

    You know about depression because you've selected the catergory for it. You wrote about cutting yourself and it is'nt a behavior associated with being well.

    You are clearly in need of some professional help for an attention seeking disorder and using AB to discuss it.

    I think you're using this serious condition for your own attention seeking and you should be doing something better with your time.

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  • by Seraphim Shinobi on March 13th, 2007

    Seraphim Shinobi

    You do need help, how long have you been cutting yourself? i have been through the same thing, i saw a therapist and i feel much better. you mother will be mad at first but she is just scared and probably feeling like she hasn't done her job properly. my mother still tells me she can't believe that i cut myself, and she hates it that i couldn't go and talk to her instead. your mother probably feels the same. you need to see a doctor, it can only get better from there.

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  • by mekare on March 13th, 2007

    mekare

    let your mom take you to someone to talk to and just see how it goes .... IF you do have depression it is much better to start getting help now .... i was about your age when mine started to get bad and i waited until i was almost 30 to get help and it made a lot of things very difficult .... see what you can do now so you dont end up like me ;)

    good luck

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  • by John. on March 13th, 2007

    John.

    I think you should take a deep breath, and stop.

    Think for a moment whether you're depressed, or whether you're lonely.

    I've knew so many people who self-harmed at school and generally they werent depressed they just thought that they were.

    If you are self-harming then you do need help. This doesnt mean however that you should go see a doctor immediatley. This is something I think a lot of people go through as a phase and will eventually leave behind.

    In our society young people seem to think that if you're depressed you should cut yourself, because thats what depressed people do. This isn't the case though. I'm not trying to patronise you and brush your problems aside here but I think you should really try and just not self-harm and to start thinking of yourself in a better light.

    If you try to take a positive attitude and leave all of that behind, then you may see that you're not depressed and that you can be happy after all.

    If you stop self-harming and change your lifestyle, yet still feel glum and unhappy then it may well be that you need to see a professional.

    You're only 13 and I'm telling you now that in 5 years you could very well be looking back on this going "Well that was silly."

    Try not to self-harm and follow all of the other social constructs related to depression, forget everyone else and think about yourself.

    Good luck.

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  • by michelle on March 13th, 2007

    michelle

    I think that you should go and get some help for this. Try it and see if it helps you. We all need some help in our life time.
    Your mom loves you and wants to have you happy and not only are you hurting yourself but your family as well. So when you go for help, your going to help them too.
    When my sister was about your age there was so much going on in our life. She turned to cutting her self too as a way of dealing with the crazy things that were going on in our life. Its a very hard thing to deal with but you need to reach out to those around you because they are there to help and are willing.
    Good luck

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  • by jae3214 on March 13th, 2007

    jae3214

    Why would you want to cut yourself? Seriously? If you keep on doing that, I'd have to say that it's something more than depression and that you need to be in the loony bin with padded walls.

    Anyway, I think that school causes a lot of depression. Until I graduated, I was depressed all the time. I would cry when there was nothing to cry about. I was on medicine for a while but I decided that I didn't want to be one of those people who need drugs to be normal. School was definitely my problem.

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  • by veedubl0ve on April 13th, 2007

    veedubl0ve

    okay..simple..DO NOT KEEP CUTTING YOURSELF..IT IS EXTREAMLY HARD TO STOP AND IT WILL CAUSE MORE PROBLEMS THAN IT IS WORTH.. PLEASE LISTEN TO ME I HAVE BEEN A CUTTER SENCE I WAS 12..I AM NOW 15 AND IT HAS CAUSED MANY PROBLEMS AND EVEN THOUGH I HAVE NOT CUT IN A FEW MONTHS I STILL WANT TO AND NOT DOING IT HAS MADE ME VERY MEAN..yes, you should get help..a therapist would be good..not a psychayatrist, they give medicine out, you dont want to become dependant on medication..and force youself to eat..i have to force myself to eat everyday..i lost 20lbs and now my school thinks im anoxexic/bulimic and i am watched to see if i eat and i am weighed constantly by my school nurses..it is all very hard to deal with i know but please eat and do not get into the habit of cutting yourself..i hope things become better for you..

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  • by P. W. Pasobrio loves Marines on March 13th, 2007

    P. W. Pasobrio loves Marines

    Oh, you need help all right. And soon. This is a sign of a very seriouse form of depression because you're not only cutting, but starving yourself. I've been whare you're at so I know kind of how you're feeling. I would go days on very little food and poke my wrists with staight pins till I felt pain, but no blood. So nobody would notice what I was doing. I would also punch my legs and dig my nails into myself. And my fiancee was a cutter, he had scars on his upper arms from straight razors. You need to get help right away because without it you'll just continue to suffer needlessly.Like we did. And your mom's not mad. She's scared. Don't worry nobody will think any less of you. And in the end you'll be better off.

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  • by Juggernaut on March 13th, 2007

    Juggernaut

    this could be a serious malady..yes, please allow your mom to help you! dont go on suffering the way you are now. take care of yourself!

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  • by little sprout on May 23rd, 2008

    little sprout

    Ok here is a simple answer to your not so simple question. I suffer from depression but have never once thought of hurting myself. Sweetheart, get help ok. Listen to your mom. You are only 13 and have some of the hardest years of your life coming up, High School. Those years can be diffecult and without a clear head going into it could make your problem much worse. Get the medical attention you so need desperatly right now. You have admitted you have a problem which is much more then people twice your age could do. That is the first step. Your mom is probably more worried then mad. Ask her for your help before she forces you to do it and then it could backfire. Take care of yourself.

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  • by Haha. on March 13th, 2007

    Haha.

    Hey, some one at my school did this before too. She told me that she went to get some professional help and it helped her. First have your mom try helping you then if that doesn't help with what you need to help with your depression, get professional help, it may help you A LOT!

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  • by sillibilli on May 23rd, 2008

    sillibilli

    Your mom isn't mad. I love my daughter more than I have ever loved anyone or anything. I don't imagine your mom feels any differently about you. You may never know how much she cares for you. Stop hurting yourself and if you don't think you can-you do need help. Being 13 can really suck, I know.

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  • by xxemogurlxx on May 23rd, 2008

    xxemogurlxx

    im a cutter/exbulimic now anorexic but i have stopped 3 other friends from cutting/self inducing puke, now im not a professional or a perv but if you want some help email me at ellagirl94@yahoo.com (this also goes 4 any1 who reads this and wants help or to talk to someone who wont tell ur parents)

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