ANSWERS: 6
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  • Yup, you should tell her. How long have you been together? Why doesn't she already know?
  • Yes, you need to tell her as a matter of course because people in relationships are honest with each other. If your girlfriend can't handle you having a close friendship with another female, perhaps now is the time to break up with her -- lying to her is not the solution, not morally, or even practically because surely she will find out and your secrecy will not put you in a good light.
  • If you don't tell her it will seem that you are hiding something and the longer you are with her the more difficult it will get to tell her. If your friend is important to you and you intend carrying on meeting her every other month you need to tell your girlfriend sooner rather than later - if she doesn't like it (which I am pretty sure she won't) you'll need to explain that it is a long term thing and in no way sexual. When your friend is in town maybe your girlfriend could meet her too for a coffee before/after your dancing?
  • This is a communication and a trust issue. As I see it, you and the "love of your life" are fighting and you have a problem communicating. You want to SECRETLY spend time with this other woman, BEHIND THE BACK OF YOUR GIRLFRIEND" or almost as bad, spring it on her at the last moment in front of this other woman! This shows me that you do not love your girlfriend and she is within her rights to tell you to "hit the road, Jack!" Tell me, would you trust her to drive 500 miles to see a guy friend of her's? Why have you not just told her your want to spend time with this other woman? I think you have not because you feel guilty about doing it and you are having trouble reconciling it in your own heart.
  • I think the circumstances are too significant for her NOT to know. You've really dug yourself a hole there. Is your girlfriend even aware of this girl's existence?

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