No one is really that good at it

Because a REAL football is brown pigskin, pointy on both of it's ends, and has lacing on one side, by which it is thrown !

Because soccer is a part of the axis of evil. No, I dunno, the States has more sports that they are involved in. I couldn't tell you why that is, but remember, England doesn't have american football, and they don't play baseball or anything really.

I have two theories on this: 1) Soccer lacks the dominance/violence aspect of the major US sports (notwithstanding the violent 'soccer hooligan' fans...:-D...) If you look at major US sports, the ne plus ultra of each sport is an act that embodies dominance and/or violence. The 'slam dunk' in basketball, the home run in baseball, the 'big hit' in football, the fist fight in hockey. In constrast, scoring a goal in soccer is usually the result of speed, cunning, tactics, skill and a bit of luck. In America's quasi-adolescent "Look at me, I'm the Man!" culture, that just doesn't resonate with the masses. 2) Unlike the major US sports, soccer lacks *scoring opportunities*. Not scoring, per se, but the tension resulting from the fact that at any moment the score may change (confession: I find soccer uninteresting for this reason). A 1-0 baseball game can be exciting because *every pitch* there's a chance that the score will be altered. In contrast, a 1-0 soccer game can be stifilingly dull because 85 minutes of a 90 minute game are spent kicking the ball around the midfield tens of yards (and seconds or minutes) from a realistic chance to score. Please don't misunderstand me. I have enormous respect for the athletic ability and skills of soccer players and I'm sure there are fascinating intracacies of the game that have escaped my attention. But I (and most of my fellow Americans) find it dull watching. My suggestion: eliminate the offside rule. If a team wishes to risk its defensive integrity by having players 'cherry pick', let them. That would turn almost every change of possession in soccer into a potential scoring opportunity.