If your spouse was molesting your child and your child told you, would you believe your child?
by 
AntigoneRising
ANSWERS: 100
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Yes, if the child is young, they won't know about (inappropriate touching (for the most part), unless it happens to them.
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yes and i would kill the spouse
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In an instant.
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yes, as a child that was molested I had no reason to make it up. I gained nothing if anything I lost so much. I was made out to be a liar and my uncle got away with it. he was able to go on with his life I still have issues. I would probably kill the sick son of a b**ch for touching my childran so it better not happen. I have had long talks with my kids and hope they feel ok to come to me at the first sign of "bad touch"
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Yes. This should always be taken seriously, even if you have a child with a flair for the dramatic.
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YES. If they're old enough and rotten enough to lie, they'll pay for it, but chances are they're telling the truth. Especially about step-parents. Do not confront him. Call the cops before he wipes his harddrive clean.
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Yes. Without any hesitation.
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I would have to know my child and my spouse before I could honestly answer this question. I would believe it was POSSIBLE and I would immediately protect my child, remove them so they couldn't be pressured or coaxed, and investigate. I wouldn't immediately take the child's word at face value and dismember my spouse out of rage, though. Children have been known to level false accusations or be confused. It is a VERY serious crime and I would of course take it very seriously and might even lean towards believing my child over my spouse...but everything deserves an objective view.
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Of course. You never know how sick people can be and gross. I've heard stories, though that usually the kid is the one who's lying, but still, I'll be careful, and move somewhere my child's safe.
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It would break my heart, but absolutely. The Child would be stashed in a safe place, I would be willing for the child to speak to professionals...and the spouse I would be hard pressed not to shoot deader than roadkill. When I was facilitator of the Partners of Survivors Group...back in San Diego I learned that an INSANE NUMBER of adult survivors HAD told their mothers of being insested by Dad, Brother, Granpa, Uncle...and the MOTHER had NOT believed them, or had denied that such could happen in THEIR family...sometimes it went on for YEARS. Often not until the child told ANOTHER adult, teachers mostly, did it stop. At least three women said that the MOTHER caught the father having sex with them and WALKED AWAY, SHUT THE BEDROOM DOOR...DID NOTHING. This is an issue that brings out any anger or violence I have in me...I can't stand it, I can't hardly believe it...If I SAW such an act...I think I'd flip and kill the bastard right there.
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I would believe the child until it was proven otherwise. If it isn't proven otherwise, then I'd become a single parent in short order.
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I would remove the child first, find the truth second.
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I would believe my children without doubt and would remove them from the situation, I also believe I would be doing time for murder.
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Without a doubt. listen to your child's statements. if what he/she is saying, arouses a suspicion in your mind, then call the police. If other events are occuring in your house that also make you suspicious, like child pornography on the computer, pornography in general, then definetely call the police. If your child is telling the truth and you do nothing, you will destroy your childs future as an adult and as a married woman. this happens everyday. Do not hesitate, call the police now.
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of course why would the child say something like that. Unless it was old enough to know that they don't like that parent!
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Nobody believed me but you can bet if I ever heard of a child being abused I would not call the police but take care of things myself.
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Nobody believed me but you can bet if I ever heard of a child being abused I would not call the police but take care of things myself.
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I would certainly investigate it!! Immediately
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I would believe my child and leave immediately no questions asked.
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Yes, and the only thing that would prevent me from taking some seriously, lethal, violent action against my spouse would be if he wasn't home at the time I found out.
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Absolutely I would leave all behind and run! I would press charges and put kids in counseling immediately and I would not let them stop til they were able to have the tools to focus on there future life. Have the tools to handle it when the pain comes back up. Wish some of your support would have been in my home when I was a child...sadly no one took me and brothers out until it was way to late.
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Yes I would...absolutely. And I would take my child and go, right then, right there. Then I would report him.
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Definatley, even if I wasn't convinced I wouldn't take the chance on my childs well being. I would have the matter investigated for sure.
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I was molested also and carried that secret for twenty years when I finally told I was yelled at for not telling sooner and asked what the f*** was I bringing it up now for
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I would not accept it as an automatic fact but I would make it a serious concern to find out. I would certainly do everything I could to ensure the child's saftey during this and if that means going off to stay with my parents or one of my trusted cousins (My brother can't handle kids well right now) then that would probably be in order. I would investigate it further and be very very watchful of the spouse. I'd do everything I could to get to the bottom of it in a quick fashion. Children have lied about these things before but obviously they are not always lying. I don't want to convict someone right away but I'm not going to ignore the accusation either.
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YES!!! NO one, even a spouse, should be molesting a child. That's sick. The child had even courage to come and tell you. That's good! Now don't dissapoint them with the spouses punishment...and I do mean PUNISHMENT!!!
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in a heartbeat, i was molested as a child but my parents never knew until recently. I have told my children that if anyone ever touches them I want them to tell me immediately and no matter who it is I will believe them and protect them. Then i would kill the scumbag that did it.
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Yes I would , even the mere chance that it was happening to a child is reason to believe and act apon that belief
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Yes I would and I would remove this person from anywhere near me or my child. If and a big IF that my child was telling fibs, this so called spouse would respect you enough for doing what you see fit to protect you child
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Yes I would - No mistake and I would take all measures to deal with it --- My big sister told my stepmom and she didn't beleive it - So therapy for me forever
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Need you ask? Duh even imaginative kids don't fancy their parents so why on earth would they lie about such embarassing hurt & abuse.
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Yes definitely! I've lived with something similar (sub spouse with uncle). My mother still won't acknowledge the truth, even though she knows it.
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1. Ewww... 2. how old is this child? 3. The kid needs help... 4. What proof does he have? 5. Probabily, i would
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you shouldnt even need to think about it. LISTEN TO YOUR CHILD!
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Any child should be taken seriously whenever any comment hinting at sexual abuse is mentioned. If you're unsure, and dont want to remove the child or press charges until certain, never, NEVER let the two alone together. Observe the two and their interaction when together, listen to types of conversations, and subtly see if any threatening looks are passed from abuser to victim. In any case, let the child know you are taking steps to get the abuser out of the house above all else, make them comfortable.
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I would take it very seriously, Here, we have a saying that says The truth always comes from children... Unless my kids told me directly that they made it up, and I would ask if the person asked them to say that, I would take no chances.
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You have no choice but to believe it! Call the police asap, ofc your partner should be able to proove their inocense (and I would pray they were inocent) but for something as serious as this, you NEED to believe the child!
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thats a big question it depends on a) how old your child is b) what your childs like e.g. manipulative and c) what your spouse is like
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i sure would, then i would shoot the spouse, right away.
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Absolutely.
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Without a doubt, and I would immediately be on the phone with the police.
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100% !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Yes. My child would have no reason to lie to me about that. Kids always come first. A spouse can leave you anytime they want, your child is your child forever. It would be really hard to take that information, especially since I have love for that person. Whether it be my spouse, or a family member. Thankfully, I know my husband would never do such a terrible thing. I hope this is just a question asked out of curosity and not something you are going through.
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That's something you cannot doubt from your child. A child who actually has the courage to say something about it at all, that right there says everything. Even if you're not sure. The safety of your child comes first.
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Definatly. I'd belive my child because they have no reason to lie.
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If I were in this situation then of course I would prefere my son to be lying than have it be true, but I would still call the police and demand an investigation! If it turned out my boy was lying then all that is happened is a wasted few hours of the polices time, if he was telling the truth then the police had better arrest the person in question before I got to him!
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I would never forgive myself If I didn't believe her. Kids just don't make stuff up like that. Thank God I'm married to a wonderful man.
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I would never forgive myself If I didn't believe her. Kids just don't make stuff up like that. Thank God I'm married to a wonderful man.
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YES; kids have no knowledge of this kind of thing and have no reason to lie about it. I wouldn't question them for a second; I would call the police immediately.
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absolutely, why would a child lie about that?
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Yes....you would be wrong to break the trust he or she has instilled in you by telling you....plus young children have no knowledge really of stuff like this....;)
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Yes .. without a doubt .. and the one that did it better be on a different planet when i find out ..
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Yes
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yes - in a heartbeat and my spouse would do the same. If I was wrong and the child is wrong, then that's okay we're adults and we'll deal with the consequences but there is no way I would not keep the best interests of my child at heart.
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It would depend on the situation--the age of the child and the severity of what I was told. I might call the authorities if I was in doubt.
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i would beleive the child. children don't joke about that and/or it is definitely wrong to lie about it.
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YES YES YES. My child wouldn't lie like that. Children are innocent and don't know about sexual encounters. It would hurt. But I would investigate. Personal experience of an idiot mother that wouldn't believe her kid. Counseling and hatred anyone?
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yes of course, even if they were a liar
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As a parent you must believe the child. What if you didn't and it were true? Could you live with the consequences?
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I would definitly believe my child, even if it turned out later to be a lie. I would much rather lose my husband for a lie than take a chance that my kid was telling the truth and do nothing..
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Yes, then I would have to go to prison for pulling an OJ.
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of course. my child would always come first no matter what. And if the child was young there would be no way they could make something up like that
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Depending on whether you are the father or the mother. Regardless of the sex or age of the child if the mother is told something by the child she would know it to be the truth. If it is a broken home where step parents are involved, always trust what the birthmother believes in her heart as the truth.
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If my spouse was molesting our child there would be a problem. We are talking about violence against children here, not just some mild punishment. If my child told me that my spouse is molesting them, I would take it seriously, and I would try to find out the truth about it. For instance, I would not necessarily believe what my spouse would tell me. However, I admit that I would normally rather believe my spouse than my child. Children sometimes tell stories, but I don't think that my wife would tell this kind of lies.
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Yes.By god children can never lie.
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Yes.
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yes i would also divorce her too!
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Yes you always give the child the benefit of the doubt no matter what!!! If you dismiss something as seriously as that then you have no buisness being a parent.
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Absolutely.
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It would be a race against time. Who would get to my partner first Me or the police cause i would kill him. If adults were to listen to children more then i think there wouldn't be as many problems in society today.
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absolutely! i would leave the said spouse and get the police involved. this is no joking matter and do everything in your power to make the abusive spouse wish he had never done what he did.
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You should always side with the child. It's a really big thing to be able to go to another adult for help and usually kids are telling the truth. It's a really common situation unfortunately.
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YES YES YES no doubt!!! listen to your child carefully . Take the child in for an exam for possible sexual assault most hospitals have a special unit for that . Believe your child , it happened to me and my mother wasn't there for my and lets just say past my 20's and still trying to get over it. Once you listen to your child and get an exam done get your child into theraphy now! You are not alone nor is your child and it is not your fault and tell your child it is NOT their FAULT!!! I am sorry to hear this you will be in my prayers and I hope every thing works out.
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Children don't make things up, if your child is telling you this then you need to do something about it before it's too late.
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That means I would be torn between two of the most important people in my life. It's a hard choice, but I think I would believe my child, my own flesh and blood.
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Its a situation where I would kick ass first and ask questions later, but I doubt my s/o would be able to talk from all the internal bleeding. That's if I was a woman that is that's doing the kicking ass part.
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YES! Most kids don't just make stuff up like that!
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yes you should believe your child. It would hurt worse knowing that you were informed about it and didnt do anything.
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You can't ignore it, that's for sure. Find out what's going on immediately!!
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always believe the child. Then investigate on your own first. Here's a thought. DONT LEAVE THE KID W/THE SPOUSE ANYMORE! JUST IN CASE! If you find anything strange, take your kid to the doctor.
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why would a child make that up, if you don't belive her/him who knowx what will happen
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Yes, I did.
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Unless and ONLY unless your child has a well documented history of lying to get people in trouble for no good reason, ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS side with your child, you are their parent and if you don't protect them who else will???
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Yes.
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yes you should. I was molested from 3 yr old to 11 or 12 years old. so please do, children doesn't lie about such a thing like that.
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100 percent YES , I was to scared to speak up about my father's abuse
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i would call the cops and believe my child.
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I would after a hospital examination backing up what they say. I've heard abot alot of kids falsely accusing their mothers boyfriend just to get rid of them. When It is proven without any doubt I'd call the cops or let the Doctor report it.
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Firstly I was molested when i was a child and i told my mom and she didn't believe me, im now 19 and i hate my step father and mother because she could off stopped it, so believe your child because they dont make stuff like that up, if you dont your child will end up hating you at the end
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Youre dam right i would believe my child! u r there to protect ure children and if u dont beleive them, wot else do they have?
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One and only word - YES!
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yes i would definitely believe my child..because there is obviously some reason as to why that child does not like that person.
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I'm glad people would believe their children. It's alwasy better to be safe than sorry, and if your spouse isn't doing anything and it was a lie, they should understand that you always put your child first and if they don't, they weren't worth it.
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YES. I would believe the child and ask questions later. I told my mother and within two days I was kicked out of my house and sent away. Forever. She now knows I was telling the truth but all those years are lost. It has hurt me for a long time. It's your duty as a parent to protect your child FIRST and then see where it leads.
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YES...!!!! How do you not! Get help and get the child help!
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YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Why wouldn't you? thats what you should be asking. a child wouldn't lie about that kind of thing. chances are, they don't even know the right words to say to lie properly.
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OF COURSE! Even if for some bizarre reason they are not telling the whole truth, it is better to make sure it doesn't happen ever again then to take the chance that they are lying. And if it's not the whole truth, there is a reason for the lie, it may even be worse than what they are telling you. Call the police immediately.
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I say a big yes. I have been in the same boat my mums boyfriend did things to me and my sister. We spoke out 4 years ago, my mother stood by him and even now is with him most of my family didnt believe me was called a liar and so on. It hurts more then any thing to not be believed. I now dont speak with my mum and many family memebers. Sad sad story but happens to many others. I would have no reson not to believe my child. My children come first in my life always will no man will ever come between that.
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This one is hard, I also had inappropriate things done to me as a teenager by my step father, my mother did not believe me. It hurt so bad that she chose him over me. This also happened to my sister. But we were both making it up, and he didn't realize it was inappropriate, this is what my mom said. Till this day she says we made it up, but she knows different. After that she would not leave us home alone with him, and she always asked us if he did anything while she was in another room. So obviously she knew. That being said there are some kids who want the attention, and I have seen this from a neighbor. The best possible thing to do is to at least get the child out of that house and away from that person, then do a full investigation and get people involved who can help(note to some:I live in IL. and have never seen DCFS help anyone around here, I have seen really bad things and they say they can't help because they are too busy and under staffed) Good Luck whoever is in this situation.
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yes you should belive them, they wouldn't know anything about it so they wouldn'y make it up.
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