What can I say... Im completely and totally gun shy and afraid to move or hope or even bother trying at all.

May I suggest something that has really worked for me? Upon rising in the morning I spend about 20 minutes meditating, talking to myself and to my God. I remind myself that everything that was negative in my life, is past and over, that there is nothing I can do to change anything. Then I ask God to guide and direct my feet on a path that he has chosen for me. Then I get up for the day and have at it. Then at bedtime, I meditate thanking God for making this day for me and allowing me to have experienced all that the day had to offer, both good and bad. Then I ask God to teach me through dreams, during tonight's sleep. All I can tell you is that I have come to a complete 180 degrees with a positive attitude. The events I put into motion during the day, seem to have God's hand in them. Give this a try. Good luck!

I know that feeling well. For me, I had to treat myself like a child in the sense that I talked to myself internally the same way i would talk to my child if one of them expressed similar thoughts. Would you allow your child to wallow in self despair? You would likely tell that child that giving an effort towards something will always yield more than attempting nothing at all. Even if your attempts fall short, you will most likely learn something that will assist you on the next try. You must move. You already know exactly what "there" is like and don't like it. It is only logical to go anywhere but where you are. If the pain was caused by a physical force, you would act immediately. If I place a red hot poker on your ass, you would move that ass. Where or how would not be nearly as important as the fact that you know that leaving it on the po9ker will just keep burning.

I went through a rough period after I had a heart attack. I was totally convinced that the end was coming and I was afraid to do anything, raging depression. I tried medications without much luck. But what I found worked the best for me, was to take time to sit down and write myself a letter. I would put into words exactly what I was feeling and what I was afraid of. And since I was the only one who ws going to read it, I could say anything I wanted. It seemed that just puting my fears and thoughts into words took a lot of the fear away from them. I hope this is helpful to you. And one more thing to remember is the word FEAR. Fear stands for this: F alse E xpectations A ppearing R eal And that is all our fears actually are. Good luck, you aren't alone in this. There are millions of us who have, had, or will have the same thing you are feeling now.

I am in somewhat the same situation. I have settled into a comfort zone that is stagnant and non-productive. I have the road map to move forward, but that will take me from my comfort zone. The key is to close my eyes clinch my fists and just jump into the water. But the question is how cold is the water, how deep is the water and will I remember how to swim. I'm just going to stand on this cliff for a few more minutes. I just hope that I jump before the wolf gets me. I'll keep you posted and let you know how the water is when I get back in.

If you place your life in God's hands and pray for His guidance in all things and follow your conscience things will work out. But, you have to have faith. Also, you have to give things time. Be selective of who you befriend. It's better to have no friends than to have bad friends. One of the things that you are referring to, I believe, is the hole that has appeared in your heart from the loss of a loved one. I have lost parents and a child. It leaves a terrible hole in you heart but, please believe, although it never goes away, the edges to get less sharp and the pain does subside so that you can remember them and the good times and those memories will bring pleasant feelings. I hope that this helps.

I stumbled on AB almost a year ago after struggling with the worst things that had ever happened in my life. It had to do with one of my grown children (I can talk about this to an extent by email if anyone cares to email me.) Really, I'm still working on getting things back together because it was so traumatizing. At that time, if I hadn't had my oldest son to talk with, AB and the hope that God would take care of things (I'm not trying just to talk about God or anything like that I promise, just telling you what I did), I don't know what I would have done. I personally was there for my grown child and did absolutely everything a good mother could do for about a year and a half. There was opposition, lack of support..I'll go further and say someone (extended family) actually outright attacked me (verbally) because they were ignorant in that they did not know the whole story. Finally, I stepped aside and prayed yet again for God to take this over because I could do nothing else and that it was my grown child's journey - I could not travel their journey for them. So, to sum it up, I lived with fear and was terrified. I clinged to every bit of hope that I could find. I vented to trusted family and friends, I tryed to have more faith and I learned to laugh more at AB. Also, and this is very important, I stay away from everything that I can that is negative - people, tv shows, etc. I search for the positive and hope.

YOu have to start meditated and taking long walks you will feel better and your mind will clear its self..Don't fear about failing, its part of living...We all fail at one time or another, but we pick ourselfs up and do it again...Its OK, for when we fail sometimes we win....Think positive...WIN..