Why do people get mad at me if I tell them I don't want kids?
by 
earlysunsets2013
ANSWERS: 25
-
I think many people think that not having children is selfish and immature. Some believe that its everyone's responsibility to reproduce because its God's will. Others believe that by not having children, one is depriving themselves of the miracles of life and the wonders of parenthood. However, I also believe that their anger, outrage and/or personal opinion on that topic doesn't really matter. Who cares what they think? Its your body and your life. I'm sure you have a better idea of whether or not you should pursue parenthood then they do. Just ignore them. After all, you know what is right for you. I wish you the best!
-
I think that by makeing the statement "I don't want kids.",it puts the other person in a position of having to defend their own position.Maybe they even feel like they're own decision to have children is being questioned just by your simple statement. IMHO,reactions of anger are covering fear.
-
People are idiots.
-
There are a lot of reasons...jealousy regarding your freedom, they feel you are selfish for not wanting to share your life and most people have an overwhelming need to have children. It's hard to relate to someone who doesn't feel that way. I have one child and I get sooooo much flack for not having more. I've been told I am selfish and cruel for not giving him siblings to grow with.
-
That's when you say how there's not enough resources in the world and how they're being selfish hogging them up....no, that was too offensive, even for my humor. Anyways, I agree that when people hear that you don't want kids, they feel threatened and maybe morally wronged somehow. Definitely with the maternal instincts women have engrained in them, I guess everyone just assumes you're against having kids or maybe just not wanting that "perfect family" image. Personally when people tell me that, I say it's a choice that they're allowed to make, especially in this economy where there's hardly enough money as it is. You don't want to have a kid that can only have a poor life and can't be taken care of.
-
That's crazy it is your decision and yours alone (or you and your husband's) lol. I think he gets a say in it!!! Having children is not for everyone and sadly there are far too many unwanted children born and many children born to people who do not make good parents. I know several couples who, like you, made the same decision and strangely enough I would say that if they had chosen to have children I believe they would have made excellent parents. I sometimes wonder whether it is because they take responsibility seriously hence their decision not to have children. As much as they are a joy it is a very responsible, time consuming job and we are not all the same and entitled to our own opinions. The important fact is that you do what's right for you and not what other people think you should be doing.
-
Depends who it is you're saying it to.
-
I have no idea, but I have the same problem. People also tell me I'm crazy for not ever wanting to get married.
-
They shouldn’t be. They are probably afraid that you will have no siblings when you pass on or nobody to leave your precious possessions too.
-
I think some people have a fear of being alone, and if they have children they will always have people around them. I want children, but it's a personal preference and I have nothing against people who chose not to have children. Some people are just not maternal, and trying to force that emotion would be depressing for the mother (or father) and the child.
-
You can't let other's beliefs sway you or you'll never be happy. Only you know what's best for you. It wouldn't be fair to the child either, not to be wanted. And think of all the money you'll save not having kids!
-
I would like to say it briefly! This type of thoughts are considered bad in society!
-
reproduction gives ultimate feeling of creation"i do'nt want kid is self-destructive behaviour"
-
Do they? That I think is strange ? !
-
Perhaps it's in the way that you tell them?
-
The only people I have ever heard say that are the ones with annoying kids. They think their kids are the best and its selfish if everyone else doesn't want to have some also.
-
Those people are just "baby lovers". They think that kids are so great and so fulfilling. They have the impression like, "Kids are so great, who WOULDN'T want one!!??". It makes me sick to be honest lol.
-
Because some people find this absurd need to set standards for other people. People who do not wish to have children, definitely shouldn't...and there's nothing wrong with that. Stop telling people what's none of their business in the first place!
-
I don't remember ever telling anyone this, other than my Mum at the age of 7 or 8. She said I'd change my mind, but I never did. Some of us just don't have that 'maternal instinct', and it's not right that we should feel pressured to add to an already over-populated world. Two of my closest school friends felt the same (yes we're all straight)and now, in our 50's, still have no regrets. I was the only one of us three who got married, but I was widowed at 24, and am still happily single.
-
I have no idea. I applaud you. There are too many lousy parents already and children suffer for it every day. If you know you're not parent material you are doing children and society a big favor by not having them. Good for you. Happy Sunday! :)
-
I have one daughter who doesn't want to have kids....which is fine with me....if that is what she wants then it is her life to choose what is right for her. I do not have a need to be a grandmother but will be one in June and am very happy. My son's mother-in-law took it that I don't want or like grandchildren, which is totally wrong. I just want my kids to be happy with their life choices. They are not here to fulfill my needs.
-
Who knows?Some people really can't imagine someone not wanting kids and think it's ok to comment on other people's choices...or maybe they want you to suffer like they're doing.lol!
-
Maybe they want to see you have kids! but i tell people that ive never had someone get mad at me,,maybe a little dissapointed, like my mom... one of my older friends said thats good look at my kids you shouldn't. LOL
-
It did not make me mad. I respect your wishes and know a lot of females who do not want kids. I do not know why anuybody thinks it is their business as to you wanting kids. Are they going to raise them for you?
-
Vampire ... people who are mad at you are plain stupid. You are entitled to your personal wishes. You have your own priorities and you have right not to have children. Don't take it too personally.
RELATED QUESTIONS
Copyright 2023, Wired Ivy, LLC