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by vegasgirl110 on January 22nd, 2007

vegasgirl110

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Is it possible to find love at 47. Like I mean holding hands, Talking, Caring, Enjoying each others company, Sex at least twice a week. I don't believe it has to die when you have been together 20 years. I just can't keep the fire burning by myself.

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Answers. 6 helpful answers below.

  • by JaiyneFortune on January 22nd, 2007

    JaiyneFortune

    It is definitely possible to find love at 47. Love can and does blossom at all ages! If anything, being 47 gives you an advantage over some people searching for love. You've got more experience in dealing with relationships, and life in general. Hopefully you'll have added wisdom about yourself as well. Knowing and loving yourself is the first thing that must happen before starting the quest for love. If you're not just "looking for love"; but instead trying to keep an established flame going, it's important to communicate. Hopefully the love will continue to exist, but you're right. You can't do all the work yourself. Love is give and take from BOTH parties. Kudos to you for realizing that!

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  • by postmuffin on January 22nd, 2007

    postmuffin

    Gee I hope so. I'm a 49 year old widow and I hope to find love again.

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  • by Wendora on January 22nd, 2007

    Wendora

    Yeah, there are tons of men looking for all these things. Sad that your husband is so emotionally and physically disconnected from you. You do sound like a sweet gal who has a lot to offer.

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  • by A on December 19th, 2008

    A

    Why wouldn't it be possible?

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  • by M Moon on October 15th, 2007

    M Moon

    I hope to only be of assistance. If I have 'jumped the gun,' or do not understand all the details that have made this discomfort, I first ask that you forgive my ignorance of these, but understand only I wish you both well!

    It is possible to rekindle love if both parties are willing. Intimate relationships can and do remain when both individuals catch 'situations' long before they become to the state that you are referring. However, may I suggest that your problem has been going on for a very long time? And, for whatever reason, there is so much water under the damn that whatever might had been caught and discussed earlier on is now firmly placed into 'positions?'

    There is no denying that I could assume that once there was love, romance and all those butterflies when you first met?

    There is never any good that comes from blaming, especially toward one we are committed to, having created a life together over many years. When we find ourselves in difficult challenges, we all become somewhat protective, especially if we don't understand or are unable to communicate the cause of that discomfort! In my view, if your situation hasn't gotten to a 'war state,' it is best to first start with perhaps, 'What am I willing to give in order to get what I want?' If you have already considered these elements and honestly feel you have made personal, conscientious efforts to 'heal' discomfort, let alone address romance and intimacy, this is even a more challenging dilemma.

    When we are in feeling distance, for whatever reason, I believe it is best to accept and suggest that if 'talking' about whatever discomfort hasn't worked between the two of you, that neither of you (currently) have the tools to move forward without outside assistance.

    In order to find those tools and to move first back to FRIENDSHIP (the precursor of intimacy of the best kind) you both then should seriously consider going into professional counseling to receive them. If the other party is unwilling, while incredibly sad, it is very good information. The least of which will allow and encourage you to take better care of your own needs and decide what to do next.

    We cannot 'fix' anyone else. Nor is it our 'job' to do so. Each individual has to come to their own decision and forms of behavior in 'their' time. No matter how much we desire or even wish it or them to be different, if we have a relationship that lacks real permanent partnership, there is no 'cure.' Cooperation comes only from those willing to obverse, offer and practice it. No matter how badly either wants it, if it isn't there, there is no amount of asking, pleading or talking that will make it so.

    Perhaps that is yet to be seen?

    However, all of that appears to be only negative ... IF you find that both of you are 'stuck,' caught in resentment for things that you honestly don't even remember how they got started and are now caught in a protective position (for yourself only) there may, indeed be hope. People who WISH to be resilient ... are. People who want to be cooperative are and will do whatever it takes to be so.

    I only send my very best wishes for both of you to find the compassion and empathy required at 'this stage of the game.' You BOTH deserve a peace filled life, one with love and all the touching and affection time would allow.

    My beloved and I work on our relationship and most of it isn't accompllished by 'just' talking, though there have been times we too saught out 'a third party' viewer for better ways to behave. Friendship, trust, the sensuality of affection and love, emotionally intelligent understanding and passion come only from action. Again, both must be will to act!

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  • by M Moon on October 15th, 2007

    M Moon

    Before I offer my own personal answer:
    I went to your profile to discover whether you were male or female, not that this matters to generally offer 'answers' let alone suggestions. Please, then, would you be so kind as to offer and share more specifics to me?

    Beloved and I have been married for 25 years (November 13) and fell in love during our late thirties. Both had previous serious relationships and came into this one with very specific ideas and standards about what we each, individually wanted in one. We are deliriously in love. We still believe and act as if we are STILL on our honeymoon. No kidding.

    However, like I mentioned above, I would love to offer emotionally intelligent and practical ideas you may do to move your relationship toward what you want and desire. I just 'need' to know more, okay -- not the least of which is WHAT does the other want or, as best as you are able, what does the other 'need.'

    Thanks for your question ... everyone deserves the best in life, not the least of which is a serene and sensual 'soft place to fall,' and be romantically and intelligently encouraged to do so!

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