Am i right to blame myself for what my father did?
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ANSWERS: 57
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depends on what your father did?
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no never.an adult should know better
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No...not at all...
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NO IT'S HIS FAULT
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only if you want to
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No, no, and no. No one should blame themselves for what another did. Don't let anyone lay that on you, including you.
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No one is responsible for another adults behavior. Adults are suppose to be able to control their emotions, not children.
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You answered your own question. You said, 'for what my father did'. Why would you be to blame for what another person does?
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No, never. You are not responsible for what your father does. He is an adult and should accept the consequences of his own actions with no finger pointing.
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nope
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No ...not at all ! Not even a bit :)
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no. you can not. it is not your fault. you have no one but your father to blame.
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never own that kinda thing, its part of the effect, just assume your power and let go of it. its over, new moment now live in this one.
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NO !! Don't you dare blame yourself, if he did it of his own free will with out your encouragement and suggestion, then he is the only one responsible, not you. Why would you take blame for the actions of your father ?? What did he do ??
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You can only control your actions and your words, not someone else, you are not responsible for another persons behavior, they made those choices. -
Hey ,Nagol!Nooooooooooo.
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Don't blame yourself. As for your father, may his karma catch up to him.
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No, just blame me. I have a list of things I'm being blamed for.
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Come out of the blame game and make your life better.
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Nope, he did it not you. You cant have control over other people choices, and he made the choice for whatever reason. It was his decision, as wrong as it is, and as much as it saddens me.
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No, no child should have to answer for the doings of the parents!
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No way are you to blame, don't even think that.
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No certainly not.That is half of the abusers strength .They make the children believe that it is their fault and that is why the child is afraid to say anything. It is NEVER a childs fault they are abused by an adult.
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what did ur father do buddy???
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i read you're comment on what "he did" to you, and you are definately a survivor!! i thought i had it bad. i of course have always blamed myself (like most victims of child abuse do) and have been told many, many times that it wasn't my fault. (of course it doesn't matter how many times you hear it, you just can't stop thinking it somehow was something you deserved, even though you know the truth of it). the most useful thing anyone has ever said to me about the whole mess is "the best revenge is to live well" i pass it on to you now. :) hug.
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I think you know the answer to that already because you are a survivor. What he did is criminal. He should be in jail right now. I had a tough childhood and got some therapy. I am doing fine now but I went through a tough time. Good Luck to you.... take care.
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Yes
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nooooooo! ur not to blame ur self you dident do anythink wrong !
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hey dude,its not your fault as everybody replys but i think u should tell your dad that it was never your fault what he done but his and only his,his excuses are his weaknesses not yours.like i said tell your dad get it out your system.keep strong.
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Absolutely. Keep it up.
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nope.And i don't blame you.
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you didnt do it so ,yes
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No. It's understandable that you might blame yourself. That is a key part in an abusers power; making the victim believe it is somehow their fault. But no, it is his fault and his alone.
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No way what so ever, you know only too well what I think and how I see it :0(
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Maybe.(For example) Did he kill the neighbor because you lied about being raped?
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No. The sins of the father are never the sins of the child.
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no you should not blame yourself for what your father did too you. i went through the same sort of thing blaming myself for what a step father did to me but i know i am not to blame for it. so please dont blame yourself anymore aas it does get you feeling low in yourself and he isnt worth that
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i don't think you should nesseselry say that because i would put the blame on your father because he is the one that has done that and you arn't the one that done that to your self on perposses he sould understand that you are still a child and he should be the responceble on he should be looking after you!.
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NO, you can NOT BLAME YOURSELF for that. I'm SO SORRY for what ever he did to you child abuse is intolerable.
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OMG HONEY NO NO NO THIS IS A VERY HARD SUBJECT AND I HAVE BIN THRU IT AT A VERY YOUNG AGE 4 SO I ACTED OUT IN SO MANY WAYS BECAUSE I NEVER TOLD ANYONE YOU REALLY NEED TO TALK TO SOMEONE AND IF YOU WANT THAT CAN BE ME I AM 35 MARRIED WITH CHILDREN AND I FEEL YOUR PAIN TALK TO A SCHOOL COUNSELOR OR E-MAIL ME JC1004@COMCAST.NET YOU ARE NOT TO BLAME AND IF YOU ARE FEELING VERY DEPRESSED FROM IT PLEASE E-MAIL ME RIGHT AWAY
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This is impossible.... I've tried mailing you from my BT address to the address you gave me, it dont recognise it, I went into my google mail (which I've know idea how to use!!) and tried to send again but it said address not correct.......advice please, cos I about ready to throw it up the wall with frustration!!!!! god I'm glad I'm going out later for a curry & beer or I think I'd go mad (cos of computers!!)
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COMPUTERS!!!!!!!!! I tried commenting to you about the probs I'm having mailing you and my comment has gone into an answer!!!! it was answer 37 but may have changed now, please browse through for it, ARGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!
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NO WAY ITS NOT RIGHT FOR YOU TO PLACE BLAME ON YOURSELF AFTER ALL... YOU DIDNT ASK FOR HIM TO DO IT!
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why should you blame yourself for his actions he is old enough to know better.
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Course Not!!
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no how can you take the blame for someone who raised or help made you if anything
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I realize how hard it is when this type of thing happens. As a survivor of abuse from a dad, I can tell you I had plenty of things I was blaming myself for. I still do. I thought maybe I wasn't a good enough daughter, that I'd never be good enough for him. That he never wanted me and he never would want me. I was too stupid, too weak to be of any use to him at all . . . but eventually I realized that I did have worth, that I was worth something, and that even if he never wanted me, that didn't mean that nobody did. You can't control your Dad - only he can do that. What you can do is realize that when he's cutting you down you're only hearing half of what he says to himself. Chances are he was abused when he was a child too. So break the chain. Make that your statement to the abuse. Try to treat your father with the kindness he never showed you. Even if that doesn't change his behavior, at least you've given him the chance to change.
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What did your father do?
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NOT AT ALL!
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No, you are not responsible for his actions; only your own.
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Depends on what he did. If you shot someone and got him to dispose the body than yes blame yourself. But I think your question is not about that. What did your father do?
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Oh good grief and stop the madness. The blame is all his and he deserves every bad thing that happens to his sorry ass. Assuming if its anything along the lines of abuse.
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no it would be your fathers falt
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Never, never, never, never, NEVER! It is ALWAYS THE ADULT'S FAULT! I don't care what you think you did to encourage him. Until you are emancipated or declared an adult it is YOUR FATHER'S FAULT.
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only if you had a weapon on him and really forced him. otherwise every person makes "their" own choices and decisions.
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i am guessing that you were young......he was the adult.......he was wrong.......get some counseling for yourself to get over this and all...take care....brian.....
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depends what he did, not realy look man you are you your dad is your dad. your dad might have done something bad that you blame yourself for but why if get in trouble does it mean your dad gets in trouble no maybe sometimes at school or some other places but never blame your self for what others do even if hes your dad you dont control him he does what he needs to do and you what you need to do. if you told your dad what he did then blame yourself but if you didnt never blame yourself. i might not know your dad but even if you did it why would he want you to blame yourself.
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