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by Anonymous on January 11th, 2007

Anonymous

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Help answer this question below.

Me & my bf of one month are 13. We live 20 mls. apart we go to diff. schools. His parents told him to break off w/ me they think he's too young & that he needs to concentrate in his studies. He said bye for now and wants us to be buddies. what do i do?

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Answers. 17 helpful answers below.

  • by Tex on May 13th, 2008

    Tex

    I know it sucks, but, you are WAY too young to be losing sleep over a boy. Trust me, you do NOT want to miss the fun of your teenage years by spending them trying to act like an adult, devoted to someone who there's a 99% chance you'll never marry. You will end up regretting it when you're older. Just go and have fun in your school, with your friends. At least wait until you can start driving before you start thinking about a semi serious relationship with a boy.

    Good luck.

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  • by Firebrand on January 11th, 2007

    Firebrand

    His parents sound very sensible to me. At your age what else would you want to be but friends?
    Being in groups with friends is much more fun than spending your time alone, just accept that you are going to continue to be friends you have many years before you need to start thinking about dating
    His studies and yours are very important they are what you build your whole life apon

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  • by __umz__ on January 11th, 2007

    __umz__

    Your parents know whats best for you and if you follow there wishes and stick to what they say you will always be in the right.

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  • by TLynnA on January 11th, 2007

    TLynnA

    I'm sorry sweetie. =( You still have a lot of living left to do. It is really terrible being 13, and we were all there. Just hang in there, and the best advice that I can give you is to just be respectful of his parents wishes. Try to show them how much of a lady that you are. (Maybe they will see how nice and respectful that you are and let there son spend more time with you.)

    Life is full of relationships of every kind, and if you really value this one, then you should approach it like a respectable young lady should.

    =D

    Hope that helps!

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  • by munchkin_kids_downunder on January 11th, 2007

    munchkin_kids_downunder

    you are only 13, respect his parents and your own parents. you still have alot of living and alot of things ahead as a teenager to tackle, so don't get haung up on this relationship. there will be plenty more.

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  • by FineBalance . on January 11th, 2007

    FineBalance .

    You did not loose him. It is good to find a friend first, lover later. You are still very young, one day at time sweety, one year at time. Do not rush to grow-up fast. Enjoy the innocence of this age.

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  • by Michellek518 on January 11th, 2007

    Michellek518

    Respect the parents wishes. And this is not what you want to hear, but it will do you both little good to create a rift between you both.

    Wait a couple years, and if you still feel the same about eachother, maybe the parents will think differently.

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  • by little sprout on May 13th, 2008

    little sprout

    I agree with everyone here. 13 is young and you will meet other boys. Wait a couple years before you decide to have another bf and focas on school and friends and just being a young girl.

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  • by call me Kat on May 13th, 2008

    call me Kat

    You're only 13, buddies is what you SHOULD be for now. Get an education! I told my son the same thing when he was a teenager. He now has a job, a home and a family, and they all are quite happy. Waiting won't kill you.

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  • by AgnusDei on January 11th, 2007

    AgnusDei

    Be his friend and wait. You really are pretty young for a serious relationship. I'm 16, and I consider myself a bit young for that. And at 13, I wouldn't have even considered. I don't mean to say that your feelings for this boy aren't real, but if they are, it won't kill you to wait before dating seriously. You'll probably be closer in your relationship if you do anyway, because you'll have spent more time getting to know each other.

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  • by Metaphiz on January 11th, 2007

    Metaphiz

    Do you have a younger sibling, or at least know someone much younger than you? Think of all the ways you are more mature than they are. Why? Because you have had more life experience than they have. Now think about how much older your parents are than you. Age matters, and your parents have had enough life experience to know what the pitfalls are for a 13 year old. They're just trying to stear you clear of them. That's worth your respect. Listen to them, and wait.

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  • by JUSTNORMAL on January 11th, 2007

    JUSTNORMAL

    I believe that it is possible that parents can know what is best for their children, even though it doesnt feel that way to you right now. But for you and your b/f is it possible to just hang out as friends, for now? No one says you cant still be "friends." In time, if it is meant to be, and you are both of age, you can start dating again.

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  • by zazzy_one on January 11th, 2007

    zazzy_one

    Ahhhhh. I re-read the question better than I read it the last time. Given that your BF's parents convinced HIM, I'll say that unless you can convince HIM to give it another try, then you're out of luck. If you can, then back to the two of you approaching. If you can't, the advice given to him was not unsound. You can't control the destiny of others, only your own. Good luck to you!

    http://www.answerbag.com/q_view/115619/262008

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  • by Sarahsmallz on May 4th, 2008

    Sarahsmallz

    Oh i remember being 13 and had a boyfriend that lived even further than that, we had to break up to because of school. This is what I did, try to be very respectful and understanding of his parents wanting him to study more, if you have to set up dates where you guys can study together ( it doesnt matter if your in diff schools you can still teach each other something) and see if his parents will let you guys hang out to test each other on who's smarter! :)

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  • by Jane on May 13th, 2008

    Jane

    say bye for now and be buddies


    PS you are too young anyway.

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  • by baby jordan x3 on May 13th, 2008

    baby jordan x3

    theres nothing you can really do. just stay friends with him. if you too really have such strong feelings for each other than youll get back together sooner or later.

    just dont worry. your young.

    im not saying its not gonna hurt but im saying maybe this is best. who knows maybe itll make your and his relationship stronger.

    just wait.

    itll work out for the best.

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  • by zazzy_one on January 11th, 2007

    zazzy_one

    Making people break up is like writing a law that they stop caring about each other. That is futile. And since they want you to be buddies, they haven't prohibited you from having contact with him?! I think the two of you need to go to them and say: ahem..."Romeo and Juliet"? Just kidding. Don't say that. But perhaps you should sit down and have a discussion with both sets of parents in all seriousness. They might be so impressed that you weren't scared by their silly mandate, that they will think you are more mature than they understood. Find out: 1) what exactly they think they have prohibited by ORDERING your "break-up," 2) find out what they are scared about, 3) figure out in this very open forum if there is a way that the two of you can satisfy their fears without having to pretend that you are "broken up." Then say, "remember Romeo and Juliet"?

    Just kidding again, sort of. I think that families break-down during these intervals when no one is being reasonable. But the true lesson from R and J is that it is impossible to break-up two kids who want to be together. That lesson is as old as time, and any one who ignores the bard on this is acting like an old fool.

    You, on the other hand, are acting like a young fool if you don't listen to the, apparently logical, concerns of your bf's folks. 13 is too young for a lot of things. It is too young for parenting, so it is too young for sex. There are PLENTY of young people who have screwed up their future because their minds were in the clouds and couldn't keep it on school work.

    Perhaps at the pow-wow, you could tell the folks, I assume you are worried about grades and sex, here are some suggestions we've brain-stormed to alleviate your pact: 1) grades must stay at _______ or no contact until they are brought back up; 2) we aren't having sex and are willing to sign a no-sex agreement for the school year; 3) we will keep our contact down to ___ hours on the weekends and three phone calls per week, and no contact until homework is completed.

    I have been a kid. (I got pregnant before I graduated college and only finish law school by the grace of god.) I am a parent (with a kid who never talks to me about his girlfriends. I'd be honored if he let me in to this part of his life.) If two kids had the gumption to walk up to me with a plan like this: I would be bowled over and try to work with them so that everyone ends up in a win-win situation.

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More Questions. Additional questions in this category.

You're reading Me & my bf of one month are 13. We live 20 mls. apart we go to diff. schools. His parents told him to break off w/ me they think he's too young & that he needs to concentrate in his studies. He said bye for now and wants us to be buddies. what do i do? - which can also be phrased in the following ways:

  • We are both 13 and my bf's parents made him break up with me 'cause they think he is still too young and he should concentrate in his studies and he says bye bye for now and wants us to be buddies. what should i do?
  • My bf and I are both 13. My bf's parents are very conservative and think we are still too young to be in a relationship. They made him break up with me. He said bye bye and said we need to be friends for now. what should i do?

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